SML Movie: The Last Cheese Stick!

Oh man, those cheesesticks are crack. >> Yeah, I will give Papa John's damn word pass just for these cheesesticks, bro. They're so good.

>> Oh, I ate way too much. >> Oh my god. >> Tell you what though, you guys are fun to take that last cheese stick.

>> I want that last cheese stick. >> No, no, I want the last cheese stick. It's my house.

I get it. >> Wait, I'm a visitor here. You should let me have the cheese stick.

>> Yeah, I'm also a visitor and I want >> Okay, but it's two visitors against one owner. Owner gets the cheese stick. >> But no, I don't think that works.

You're outnumbered. The visitor should get the cheese stick. >> Yeah, dude.

Let me have the cheese stick. Now let me have the cheese. >> Let me have the cheese.

>> I'm homeless. >> Well, I'm hungry. >> Well, I'm also hungry.

>> I'm hungry bungry. >> Oh, you're hungry. Oh [ __ ] he's hungry bungry.

>> Oh, this is the next level hungry. >> Listen, guys, there's a whole another pizza over there. Why don't you just eat that pizza while I eat the cheese stick?

>> Well, why don't you eat the pizza and we eat the cheese stick? >> Cuz I don't like red sauce, Cody. There's no red sauce on the cheese stick.

Red sauce gives me ass reflux. >> Why would you buy the pizza, MAN? THAT'S SO STUPID.

>> I THOUGHT YOU GUYS WANTED A pepperoni pizza. Look, you guys can pull the pepperonis off and eat the pizza and I'll eat the cheese stick. >> No, we want the cheese stick.

>> I want the cheese stick. Okay, there's got to be a way for three of us to figure out who wants the cheese stick. >> Okay.

Okay. How about we cut the cheese stick into three equal slices? >> Oh, no.

No, no. That's so tiny. That's not going to be yummy.

>> Yeah, that's not going to satisfy my my hunger. >> Oh, yeah. Be one little tiny bite.

>> Yeah. I mean, I also want the whole cheese stick. >> I want the whole cheese stick, too.

Okay. When when there's when three people want one thing, how do you guys figure it out? >> Rock, paper, scissors.

>> Bite to the death. >> I do not want to play rock paper scissors. It's unfair.

>> How is it unfair? >> Because people know how to rig it. They know how to cheat.

>> You can't cheat in rock paper scissors. >> Some people are better rock paper scissors than other people. >> Yeah, you can do like rock paper scissors grenade.

Someone Someone always throws grenade. They never play rock paper in that. >> I've never heard of a grenade.

See, look, he's adding grenades to it. >> Yeah, it's already getting complicated. >> Yeah.

No. See that? People know how to cheat.

We're not doing that. There has to be another way. Oh, I got it.

I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10. Whoever gets closest to the number gets the cheese stick. Go.

[snorts] >> Seven. >> I said seven first. >> Well, no.

I was already thinking about seven. >> Well, the number was three and I guess three, so I get the cheese stick. >> What the hell?

>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU GUESSED THREE? You already knew the number. >> Not fair.

I didn't choose it. >> I swear before I picked the number, I was going to guess three and then I picked the number three and I was right. >> You didn't pick.

It sounds like you were already just thinking about the number three. >> I swear to you, if I would have thought of the number seven and you guys have voted seven, then then you guys it would have been tied between you guys. But I was thinking three.

I I picked three and I got it right. >> Wait, but how do we know you wouldn't just say, "Oh, no, that's not the number I was thinking of. " So you could take the the cheese stick.

>> I wouldn't lie, Cody. I did not li Okay, fine. You want someone else to pick the number?

>> Yeah, somebody else has to do it. >> Okay, someone else PICK THE NUMBER. CHEF PEEP, GET OUT OF HERE.

>> CAN'T believe you guys don't trust me. >> What do you bre? I was just in the kitchen cooking.

>> I don't know why you're cooking. We ordered pizza. >> Wait, what the hell?

Pizza? Nobody told me about this. >> Well, listen.

There's a lot of pepperoni pizza if you want any, but there's one cheese stick left. Me, Joseph, and Cody all want it. How do we determine who gets it?

>> Wait, wait, wait. Didn't you guys do this like 2 years ago over a damn cookie? Grow the [ __ ] up.

>> Maybe he's right. Maybe we should grow the [ __ ] up. >> Okay.

Well, if you're going to grow up, Cody, and be a big boy, then let me have the cheese stick. >> No, I'm a big boy who likes cheese sticks. >> Me, too.

I like cheese stick. >> I want the cheese stick more. So, chef, I need you to think a number between 1 and 10, and whoever's closest guessing it gets the cheese stick.

>> Okay. Well, what do I get out of this? I don't benefit out of this situation.

Well, you can have some of this pizza. Nobody wants >> Yeah, you can have the whole pizza. >> Pizza.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

I'll pick a number, too. >> Okay. So, pick a number 1 through 10.

>> All right. Um, seven. >> Well, that's crazy.

You guess the same number as me and Jo. >> Wait, wait, wait. You're not You're not supposed Chef People, you're not supposed to tell us.

You're supposed to have it in your head and we guess it. >> Well, you didn't tell me all that. You just said pick a number.

>> So, pick a number. Do not tell us and then we all guess. >> Okay.

All right. All right. I've picked a number.

Okay. So, >> I'm Cody, you guess first. >> Uh, nine.

>> Three. No, Joseph, you know, I was going to guess three. >> Well, I don't know WHAT YOU WERE GOING TO GUESS.

>> OKAY, YOU KNOW, I'LL GUESS four then. >> Well, it was three. >> WHAT?

OH, HELL NO. NO, NO, NO, [screaming] NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. YOU DIDN'T WIN.

NO, NO, NO, NO. YOU You don't get You don't get chef Peep. How do we know that you just don't like me?

And then the actual number was four. And since I got it right, you you picked Joseph cuz you like him more. >> Cuz it ain't that deep, [ __ ] I just want some pieces.

>> No, no, no, no, no, no. Get a piece of paper and REDO REDO. >> WHAT?

WHAT? >> YEAH. We do not know if Chevy be telling the truth because he he sometimes hates me.

So, how about this? Shamp has to think of a new number. One through 100.

Write it down so we know he doesn't change it. And then we guess he flips the paper over. >> BRO, I WON THE Just give me THE CHEESE STICK.

I ALREADY WON. >> YOU DID NOT WIN, JOSEPH. SHIBBY, go get a piece of paper now.

>> Oh my god. IT'S NOT THAT DEEP. >> Joseph did not win that.

That Shappy easily rigged that. >> Junior, I really want the cheese stick. But Joseph totally won.

>> I totally won that [ __ ] >> You did not win, Joseph. You know, I guessed three the first time we played it when I had the number in my head. >> SH WASN'T EVEN UP HERE THEN.

>> LISTEN, we're going to just It's going to be fair. This next time's going to be fair. >> All right, Br.

I'm back and I wrote down the number. >> Is it between 1 and 100? No, it's between 1 and two, dumbass.

>> Then I guess two. >> I think he's being sarcastic. >> I'm being sarcastic, you idiot.

Choose a number between 1 and 100. >> Uh, you go first, Cody. >> I'm going to pick 69.

>> Um, when did Ellen Degenerous come out as gay, Cody? >> 1997. >> Uh, I'll choose 97.

>> You guys are stupid. I'm picking the winning number, which is three. >> Why would you choose the same damn number, dude?

>> He's not going to pick it again. >> Okay, cuz the first time I picked the number, it was three, and then Chef picked three the second time, and you stole my number, Joseph, >> I would have won. You made me pick four because you chose three first time.

You just >> No, I'm picking three. I'm picking three. I'm picking three.

It's three. All right. Sh.

What is it? [snorts] >> Well, it's not three. It's 100.

>> Well, see, I win cuz I was the closest. >> Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You You didn't win.

>> Even though Jo did not win. >> No, I think he won. >> No, no, no, no, no.

He didn't guess 100. No one guessed 100. We have to do it again.

>> No, he was closest though. >> I was the closest. >> It was not closest.

It was whoever could guess number between 1 and 100. >> But, but he was the closest to >> it. No, no, it's not closest.

And also, I picked three. I said three. >> That's the furthest number.

>> I I said threedigit number, which >> you did NOT [ __ ] SAY. I SAID THREE DIGIT NUMBER. I SAID THREE DIGIT NUMBERS.

THIS IS >> WHY JOSEPH and I DON'T TRUST YOU. >> EXACTLY. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

You picked the wrong number. It was between 1 and 100. You cannot pick one or 100.

Pick a number between 1 and 100. He picked 100. You can't pick that number.

You have to pick 2 through 99. >> Wait, wait, wait. So why did you pick two when he said 1 and two?

>> Exactly. >> The rules are established now. >> The rules change every time you don't like him.

>> YOU KNOW WHAT, SHEP? WE DON'T [ __ ] NEED YOU. YOU MADE IT WORSE.

You complicated. Give him his [ __ ] pizza relief, >> please. Yeah, take a pizza.

I sweat one of yall. >> Yeah, take a stupid pizza. We don't need you.

Made things worse. >> Thank you, Pete, because I actually won. >> You did not win, Joseph.

Three. I said a threedigit number, which is 1 0 0. I got it right.

>> You did not say that. >> Okay, listen, guys. We'll find a different way.

Oh, I got I got I I know what I do. I'm going to get a deck of cards. >> What?

>> Boom. A deck of cards. Whoever draws the highest card wins.

>> Okay, I like this. Completely fair. No cheating.

>> Mhm. >> I get to draw first, though. >> No, no, no, no.

Hold on, hold on. I got to check something. >> Wait, no.

Wait, wait. Okay. So, I'm guessing you put a king on top so you win.

[clears throat] >> No. No. I shuffled it.

>> Oh, yeah. Okay. So, the next one or both two.

So, me and Joseph would tie and you would win. >> [ __ ] I knew it. >> I swear I did not put those on top.

>> Yes, you did. >> You got the deck. SO, HOW HOW >> I I I SWEAR OH, you know what, guys?

I'll be honest. I did do that. >> I did I did try to cheat, but I swear to you that I don't know the next few cards.

So, you I I'll draw Cody who you draw next. >> No, you wanted to go first. You go first.

>> I don't want to go next. >> No, let's go first. Yeah.

>> Okay. Give me the Give me the card. >> Oh, look at that.

It's the four of hearts. >> Okay, Cody, you go. >> My turn.

I got the eight of diamonds. Guess I'm eating a cheese stick. >> Oh, no, dude.

Give me my card. >> See what you got. Oh, it's the eight of hearts.

>> Eight of flowers. Yeah. Look like we tied.

>> Wait, y'all both got eight. >> Yeah, but you're out, Junior. >> Well, no.

No. I'm not out. >> Yes, you are.

You have the lowest number today. >> No, no, no, no. Listen.

You got eight of diamonds. You got eight clover flowers. And I got four hearts.

What is more valuable? Four human beating hearts. >> Eight [ __ ] diamonds.

Eight flowers depending. >> No, no, no. The flowers are stupid.

Flowers you can go pull out of the ground for free. Diamonds. Are you kidding me?

Four hearts. Heart transplants are so hard you have to get on a weight list. A human heart.

We all need a human heart to live. So four human hearts is more valuable than eight stupid dumb diamonds. >> Well, it depends on the diamonds.

That's a pretty [ __ ] expensive diamond. >> Look how tiny those diamonds are. >> Look how tiny your hearts are.

They're like rat hearts. >> Listen. Listen.

On the black market, people are going to pay more for a human heart than a stupid diamond. >> No, I think I Okay. Okay.

How about this? What about a heart-sized diamond? That would be a pretty big diamond.

But but the card doesn't specify how big the diamond is. You have to go off the base that it's that small. >> How about your heart is that small?

>> Yeah, we don't even know the [ __ ] wrench heart. >> The cards are stupid. This is a dumb idea.

The cards were a dumb idea. >> It was your idea. >> You know, I I don't like the cards idea.

You know what? I'm not going to come up with any more ideas. Cody, since you're smart, you think of a game that's fair that all three of us can play that doesn't involve running, that doesn't involve counting money.

All right. >> Something a white non-Jewish person could win. >> Okay.

So, you >> something in your favor. >> Something that is fair for all of us. What is something that's fair for all of us?

>> Okay. How about this? Dice.

There's no hearts. There's no no diamonds. No flowers.

Just Just pure numbers. Just dice. >> Okay.

Okay. I like that. >> What What do we do with the dice?

>> We roll them. And whoever has the highest number wins. >> Yeah.

Simple. >> What What the dice are weighted? >> They're not going to be weighted.

I'm going to get them from Monopoly. >> Mhm. No way to cheat.

>> Standard dice. >> Oh, okay. I guess that's fair.

All right. >> You got a problem with that? >> No.

No, no, no, no. It's >> okay. Seems like you're shaking.

Go get them. >> No. Let's go clean up the cards.

>> Okay, I got the dice. They're just normal dice. See?

Nothing wrong with them. >> Yeah, it looks normal to me. >> Wait, are they weighted?

>> No. Why would they be weighted? >> Then why are they already on six?

They're already on the highest numbers. >> Stupid. >> Is this better?

>> No, that one's still on six. >> How about this? >> Okay, make sure you shake them before you throw them.

>> Dude, you're the one that was cheating the most. >> I think he's just trying to place them down so he gets the highest number. >> No, I'm going to roll them here.

>> Yeah. Okay, how about that? Seven.

>> Okay, I like that. Yeah. All right.

Give me them dice. Watch me roll. Give me a big number like a pregnant [ __ ] with twins.

Oh, seven. >> Wait, what' you get? >> I got seven.

We That's another tie. >> So, I got to roll again. Huh?

>> Wait. Wait. No.

No. Hold on. Let's just see if I roll higher.

If I roll higher than you guys, I win. >> Okay. >> Can you give me the dice in my hand?

>> Yeah. Yeah. Here we go.

There we go. >> Okay. All right.

And Oh. Whoa. Whoa.

Whoa. LET >> IT'S A 12. >> HOW THE HELL IS THAT?

>> SHUT THE [ __ ] UP. THE DICE FELL OFF THE COUCH AND those are just under the pizza box. >> You planted that there.

>> No, I did not. They went under the pizza box. >> They went under the pizza box, guys.

I rolled a 12. >> I watched them on the floor. Look, I see.

>> Oh, you had hidden dice on the ground. >> You had hidden dice under the pizza box. >> See, here you go.

>> You are disqualified. You don't get to go. >> NO.

NO. NO. OKAY, FINE.

HOW ABOUT THIS? WE'LL ALL RESTART. I'll go first and THEN YOU YOU GUYS BOTH GOT SEVEN.

I'll roll first and then you guys both roll. Okay. >> Okay.

>> Okay. I said you guys. All right.

Let me go give you Okay. I'm going to roll for real. Why you seem so sad, >> right?

What's wrong? >> That's a two. >> It's about as bad as you can go.

>> Oh, can I roll? Can I? >> It's my turn.

Let's see how I did. Okay, I got another [ __ ] Joseph. It's looking pretty good for you.

>> No. Okay, that's [ __ ] >> Well, if it looks like it's a bad day for y'all cuz uh cheese stick time. >> I thought you got a four.

>> No, no, no, buddy. That's a eight. GIVE MY CHEESE STICK, [ __ ] >> NO, [screaming] >> WE BOTH TOO.

THAT THAT'S GOT TO BE LIKE A ROLL. WE GOT TO REROLL. Oh no.

>> We tied. >> He deserves it. He won the OTHER GAMES.

>> WE TIED, CODY. WE TIED. THAT MEANS WE HAVE to replay.

>> Doesn't matter, Junior. He deserves to win. >> What's wrong?

>> This was cold. >> Oh yeah, we did take a long time. >> Took forever.

It was frozen, basically. >> Wait. Give me the dice.

>> God damn. >> Give me the dice. Put in my hand.

PUT MY HAND. >> WHAT? >> PUT PUT MY HAND.

Put my hand on, Junior. Okay. >> The cheese stick's gone.

You see you still [laughter] [ __ ] Junior. Dumb ass. You're pathetic.