Peter Dinklage '91 Addresses Bennington College's Class of 2012

[Applause] [Music] [Applause] don't be frightened who aren't a Bennington student ten minutes before you come up to the podium hands you a mace that he made if you don't bring it to the podium with you you'll never be Bennington so I would like to thank you Ben for helping me put the fear of God in the audience tonight but I have to put it down because I'm an actor and I'm really the week that was heavy it wasn't like a prop that [ __ ] was real thanks Ben uh so now I'm gonna read and

I'm not off book sorry I might be looking down a lot Thank You president Coleman Brian and Conover faculty students family alumni some of whom are dear friends of mine who have traveled all the way from the big city to see me hopefully not humiliate myself tonight and especially thanks to you the graduating class of 2012 see I as a joke I wrote hold for applause and I was actually gonna read that so you kind of killed my joke let's let's do that again mm drop hold for applause 2012 wow I never thought I'd see

2012 I thought perhaps the Mayan calendar would prove correct and the end of the world would have been the greatest excuse to get me out of this terrifying task of delivering the commencement speech but wait according to the Mayan calendar here when does the world in December December 2012 damn okay maybe I shouldn't talk to the graduates eager to start the new lives about the end of the world okay really really of all the novelists teachers playwrights poets groundbreaking visual artists and pioneers of science you got the TV actor [Applause] and I actually heard you

petition for me oh you fools you know what for those of you who didn't petition for me I would love to later on talk about the problems in the Middle East and the you know the downfall of the world economy and for those of you who did petition for me I don't have any signed DVDs of the game of Thrones but I'm happy to talk about the parallel lineages of the Targaryen Zin the Lannisters later at the bar you see it took all of my strength and of course a little extra push from my wife

Erica for me agree to agree to do this because I don't do this in my profession I am told by people who know what they're doing where to stand how to look and most importantly what to say but you've got me only me my words unedited and as you will see quite embarrassing okay let me think I'm thinking but max I didn't read that that was ad-lib let me think what has everyone and their uncle told me as I desperately seek out advice on how to give a commencement address tell them what they want to

hear talk about your time at Bennington know that there is no wrong speech I like that one just keep it brief that was my father-in-law be brutally honest tell them how hard it is after you graduate we'll get back to that one just watch Meryl Streep's commencement speech at Barnard and you'll be fine what did Beckett say I can't go on I'll go on so even if I don't burn in your hearts and minds long after this speech is over even if I don't inspire you to reach for the stars and beyond even if I

am erased from your memory after one glass of wine tonight where am I going with this I can't go on I'll go on you know I won't speak of my time here like some old fisherman you have already had your time here you have your own story to tell but I have to say for me it did start here in Vermont on a very rainy night it was 1987 and I was a prospective student the rain was coming down so hard it was impossible to see that I was meeting the person who would later become

my greatest friend and collaborator a freshman who would 17 years later and introduced me to the woman that became my wife I'll call him Sherm because I do it was late at night on the road right there near booth house and despite the dark night and the heavy rain this place was so alive the lights pulsed from each of the dorms now I was a kid from New Jersey who went to an all-boys Catholic High School I was four foot something I mumbled when I spoke I wore a sort of woman's black velvet cape black

tights combat boots and a scowl but here at Bennington I was home and I have to say it doesn't get better hmm let me clarify there are not shinier more important people out there your fellow students your friends sitting around you are as good as it gets 22 years after my own graduation I have worked with my rainy night friend and fellow graduate Sherm on countless productions he has written in all stages of development from living rooms to off-broadway Brooks Ian Justin breath John Matthews Jim Shawn Hyland Ikki entha B are all classmates I shared

my time with here and still work with and I'm lucky to call my friends we are very spoiled here people always say to me for such a small school it seems like there are so many of you I find that really interesting and I kind of think that's perfect we can't help it we burn very brightly please don't ever stop graduates now when I sat where you are right sitting right now I had so many dreams of where I wanted to go who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do theater companies I

wanted to start with classmates movies I wanted to be in directors I wanted to work with stories I weeded to tell it might take a little time I thought but it would happen when i sat there excuse me 22 years ago what I didn't want to think about is where I would be tomorrow what I would have to start to do tomorrow and I graduated in 1991 a great year a time of resurgence for independent films in this country a time of relatively affordable rents in New York City let's see I assumed that I could

make a living writing my plays acting way off off off Broadway and hopefully one day join the actors I loved and respected in those independent films TV Oh what no what are you kidding me no didn't even consider that I had much more class than that much more self-respect than that soap operas in ship what I didn't have was cash a bank account a credit card or an apartment I just had debt a big hungry growing larger every moment debt so as you will tomorrow I had to leave beautiful Vermont I packed the life that

I knew with socks and a toothbrush into my backpack and I slept on couch after couch after couch after couch at friends apartments in New York until I wore out their rent paying roommates welcome I didn't want a day job I was an actor I was a writer I was a Bennington graduate I had to get a day job I dusted pianos at a piano store on Ludlow Street for five months I worked on the property of a Shakespeare scholar for a year pulling weeds and removing bees nests I went on unemployment once but for

not for long I couldn't handle the guilt eventually I was able to pay rent for a spot on the floor of an apartment on the Lower East Side but my roommate had a breakdown and disappeared he later resurfaced in a religious cult I'm making this sound romantic it really wasn't I helped hang paintings at galleries paintings that inspired to inspire you to think I could do that and then finally after two years of job and couchsurfing I got a job in application processing as a data enter er at a place called professional examination services and

I stayed for six years six years longer than my time at Bennington from the age of 23 to 29 well they loved me there I was funny I wore black no cape no tights I smoked in the loading docks with the guys from the mailroom and we shared how hungover we all were everyone called each other shorty what's up shorty how you doing shorty also hungover shorty I called in sick almost every Friday because I was out late the night before I hated that job and I clung to that job because of that job I

could afford my own place so I lived in Williamsburg Brooklyn ended [Applause] yeah you say that now or my kingdom for a time machine yeah that's right I lived in an industrial loft my rent was $400 a month my dream of running a theater company with my friend and fellow Bennington graduate Ian Bell had died I won't go into those details but neither one of us had any business sense and the theater we lived in it had no heat or hot water we didn't smell very good but we had our youth the youth gets old

very quickly you'll see so Ian moved out to Seattle and I moved up to the street to my loft and I still didn't have heat in 1993 industrial loft meant not legal to live there I see I don't want this to sound cool and I feel like it's sounding cool ad lib but I did have hot water mm-hmm hot water in my bathroom which a friend of mine using said bathroom once shouted it smells exactly like a summer camp in here it was true for some reason in the middle of Brooklyn there was earth in

my shower actual earth and then look mushrooms growing from the earth but I was safe though the ideal fire control company was right across the street where they make all the chemicals that put out chemical fires I did not fear a chemical fire I would be okay and all those chemicals in the air were okay too because up the street we had the spice factory they made spices and that just covered everything up in a nice human scent I had a rat but that was okay because I got a cat his name was Brian no

relation my grandmother had given me a pink pull-out couch oddly no friends or recent graduates wanted to crash on my couch so I put the couch on its end so Brian could climb it and look out the window I had only the one window I myself could not look out the window it was it was quite high so I had no heat no girlfriend what are you kidding me no acting agent but I had a cat named Brian who told me of the world outside and I stayed for ten years no don't pity me there's

a happy ending when I was 29 I told myself the next acting job I get no matter what it pays I will from now on for better or worse be a working actor so I quit my position at the professional examination services my friends really weren't happy about that because he was so easy to find me when I worked there work was the only place I had the Internet this was at the beginning of the Internet and now I didn't have either the internet or a cell phone for a job but something good happened I

got a low-paying theater job in a play called imperfect love which led to a film called 13 moons with the same writer which led to other roles which led to other roles and I've worked as an actor ever since but I didn't know that would happen at 29 walking away from data processing I was terrified ten years in a place without he six years at a job I felt stuck in maybe I was afraid of change are you my parents didn't have much money but they struggled to send me to the best schools and one

of the most important things they did for me and graduates maybe you don't want to hear this is that once I graduated I was on my own financially it was my turn parents are applauding graduates are not but this made me very hungry literally I couldn't be lazy now I'm totally lazy but back then I couldn't be and so at 29 and a very long last I was in the company of the actors and writers and directors I'd sought out that first year that first day after school I was I am by their sides raised

the rest of your life to meet you don't search for defining moments because they will never come well the birth of your children okay of course forget about it that's I just six months she's my life is forever changed that's the most defining moment ever but I'm talking about in the rest of your life and most importantly in your work the moments that define you have already happened and they will already happen again and it passes so quickly so please bring each other along with you everyone you need is in this room these are the

shiny more important people sorry it sucks after graduation it really does I mean I don't know at least it did for me but that's the only thing I know you you just get a bit derailed but soon something starts to happen trust me a rhythm sets in just like it did after your first few days here just try not to wait until like me you're 29 before you find it and if you are that's fine too some of us never find it but you will I promise you you are already here that's such an enormous

step all its own you'll find your rhythm or continue the one you I've already found I was walking downtown in Manhattan the other day and I was approached by a group of very sweet young ladies easy actually they're sort of running feverishly down the street after me when they got to me breathless it was really they didn't know what to say or it couldn't form the words but it came out that they were NYU freshmen and they were majoring in musical theatre of course come on there are like science majors we're running after me what

musicals are you doing I inquired well one of them said looking down at her shoes we aren't allowed to be in plays our yet our freshman year now they were paying a very high tuition to not do what they love doing I think I said well hang in there what I should have said was don't wait until they tell you you are ready get in there sing or quickly transfer to Bennington when I went to school here if a freshman wanted to write direct and star in her own musical the lights would already be hung

for her now I tell this story mm-hmm because the world might say you are not allowed to yet I waited a long time out in the world before I gave myself permission to fail please don't even bother asking don't bother telling the world you already show it do it what did Beckett say ever tried ever failed no matter try again fail again fail better bennington class of 2012 the world is yours treat everyone kindly and light up the night thank you so much for having me here [Applause]