so you want to have a glow up I heard this is the reality about following yourself right and I'm learning that and I've been avoiding it a lot but I keep realizing it the more you work on yourself the more you focus on yourself the more you work on yourself the more you focus on yourself the less people are going to like you and by people I mean your old friends your partner or maybe your ex partner your family's going to have to adapt to who you're becoming and you're going to grow a bit distant
to them you're not going to be as close anymore you're going to talk differently to them it's part of growing up as well and that is what I'm experiencing right now that's what I'm experiencing now being away for real this time in a big city far away from home very far away from home feels amazing to say it out loud well anyways so here's what I want you to do picture who you want to be now maybe that person is someone who would not have been rejected by that girl that you really liked that really
hurt you when they rejected you or someone who you wish you were guess what that's who you're going to become I'm not kidding that is who you're going to become so if you just work towards it slowly but work towards it no matter how slow or fast you go there's been times where I was making a ton of progress and then there's been times where I've made like no progress but I've always still kept it in here like in my [ __ ] eyes like that's where I was looking that is where I was looking
the whole time the whole time I knew I knew where I was going I knew exactly where I was going believe it or not I new you might ask yourself is it ethical you know to compare yourself from whatever to this idea you need something you need a goal where you want to go if you want to become I don't know whatever it may be you're going to work towards that and you're going to better yourself I've become someone who my inner child would be would find really [ __ ] cool you know and I've
matured so much there was always people who I would look up to and they were very mature or very you know and I I I've always gravitated towards those people because I was like wow you know and now I'm working towards becoming that you know slowly but surely slowly but surely still a lot of stuff that I need to like I need to do but um all the time I feel like I'm not doing enough and that's normal it's how it's going to feel it is how it's going to feel that all the time you're
not I'm not doing enough you're not doing enough and as long as you don't forget that you need to be nice to yourself even through tough times even though look I think being nice to yourself is the toughest not when you're supposed to be doing something that's really hard and you need to tell yourself [ __ ] get on come on move on you know no that's not the toughest moment the toughest moment where you need to learn to be nice to yourself is when you're having a lazy day is when you've been having a
streak of not doing very Progressive things the hardest times to be nice to yourself to have selflove are the moments where you're doing the least amount of work when you're being lazy easy when you failed those times are the toughest to be nice to yourself and you need to learn to do that you need to learn to be nice to yourself you've got nobody else on this planet no one I I yes you do have your family and you do have your partner future partner who knows friends but I'm talking specifically when it comes to
your life you only have yourself all my past friends that are back home those people did a lot for me all those people back at home did a lot for me my old friends but they never had the same vision I had and I've moved on the only people who are still with me are the people who have the same kind of mindset the same kind of vision and I learned to not fight for other people's attention anymore and now it's actually kind of turned on me and I have to learn to be a nice
person and and give attention back and some people people might find it [ __ ] up and be like oh you so you're a bad person now no I'm I have put myself first if you think you're being a bad person when you have to try and give people attention that means you have no self-respect that means you're lacking self-respect because that's not how life works if you want to make something out of your yourself you're going to be focused you're going to be busy even when you're not doing anything your mind is going to
be set towards your goals towards the vision that you have of Life see when people say you need to have your goals in mind it's it's difficult because your goals can change what I like to think about is the vibe okay the vision of what do you want your life to feel to be like you know what do you see yourself with do you see yourself let's say in some place like where there's nature with a nice beautiful house made out of wood with your dogs and your sheep and things like that or maybe what
you want is like a nice pent house apartment in a city with gold and things like that and you have your Ferraris down in the basement maybe that's what you want maybe you have a vision where you're speaking to hundreds of people thousands of people maybe there's that whatever it may be maybe you see yourself kind of in the military maybe you see yourself as a writer it doesn't matter but you have to have this Vision this feeling you see yourself you picture yourself you [ __ ] close your eyes and you picture yourself and
you feel like you see there is my house how does my day look like what are my free time activities that I can now do because I know I'm financially free because now I know I'm doing what I love maybe maybe I like to work now I like to do my work I like to do the work because the work that I'm doing now I love it imagine that that's where you're going to become now look at your friends now and this is the most painful thing because I am someone who's always been a people
pleaser but today I deleted [Music] Instagram and I'm thinking about doing it for good but that's still [Music] being I'm still being scared by doing that what I should actually do is to just unfollow everybody who I just don't connect with anymore and you might think that's being a bad person you're being a bad person because you're forgetting where you come from this and that well the people there's still people in my life who I connect with that know me very well but they have also kept going and I connect with them because our Visions
are the same I do not owe anything to anybody think of it this way right think of it this way why should you owe your friends anything do you owe them something do you owe them to always be there no matter where they go no matter if they don't see you anymore no matter if they've been distant no matter if they've changed do you owe them that no you don't see this thing about Brotherhood and friends for life and whatnot may be with a girl as well doesn't matter that only works when you're both going
the same direction because that means you're still being being likeminded it doesn't work if you want two separate things if you look I have a friend now we're very different we're very similar in in kind of some aspects of insecurities and the past we have different backgrounds but we have the same vision we talk very differently but we have same vision we have a similar mindset it just it's just there and you know what the best part is he makes me a better person not because he can take me out and we can have fun
and meet people and drink and this and that not because he's someone who listens and understands not because he's just fun to hang around with or to do fun things and activities with no the first two ones are very important yes but the most important part is he has the same vision and he's someone who's going after it and he's someone who works hard he's a very disciplined person very disciplined and very hardworking sometimes and I'm not going to lie I think it's just too much sometimes I have a different work ethic or way of
working but still I want to be more hardworking cuz I know I can be very lazy and then I have another friend who I find very nice and she's very smart she studies a lot she has a lot of hobbies also very disciplined and then I realized the friend group I am building now the people I'm meeting now they all people that are going to give me something and that is being more disciplined see I isolated myself and I do still isolate myself from friends and family because it's just something I need I'm very focused
on myself and by that I literally mean just I need time to think about everything it's just what I need here's the best part the friends I have now or that I'm making now I need to learn to disappoint them cuz they need to learn who I really am because I will not people please I will not try to please them if I don't want to go I'm not going to go I don't show up as much I have in inadequacies if you think you're perfect you're definitely not and I know I'm not I know
damn well I'm not I want to find myself that is my [ __ ] job and it's not my job and it's neither your [ __ ] job to make other people happy there's a big difference there between sharing your your person sharing who you are and your light with others and then feeling great because you're together and you're in your there in your company right and you're in theirs you're in their company as well that is that is love that is beautiful but then thinking about how can I make them happy all the time
it's not it it's not it they are there for reason your friends are there because they like you and if you don't have any friends that just means you haven't met the right people yet it's the card that you've been given maybe you don't socialize well they're probably right around the corner and you haven't even met them yet just cuz you haven't said hi I guarantee you everywhere you go there's going to be people just like you last part that is very important is you need to build an ego okay an ego that will push
you towards I am worth it and [ __ ] yeah I'm great I'm better not in a very narcissistic way but you need to have something in you that says no yeah that's I'm supposed to be doing that I am supposed to be doing that I am supposed to be right here I am supposed to be the chosen one for this damn right that's what you need you need enough amount of that enough amount of ego a big enough ego that says yes I'm the right one for the job yes I'm the the one who
should be on stage yes I'm the one who should be doing this yes I'm the one who deserves this opportunity love admiration respect vacation even food whatever use your past for your own benefit we all have something that really hurt us use that for your own benefit what I mean by that is the way that you the way that you confront your own biggest fears is by using that as fuel so for example I am [Music] someone who was rejected a lot growing up and that pain bolted me into becoming someone who improves himself because
I don't want to be rejected anymore so I've used that pain without noticing it I've used that pain and used it for something good for self-improvement glow up confidence therapy self-care selflove um understanding shallowness understanding human nature more understanding social interactions social life social science itself and I'm still learning every single day and the best part is is I can be so proud of myself for having done this jump in my life because I did it it was my decision you know you're you're going to have a gut feeling of things that you wish you
would do and you're eventually going to do them and when you do them you're not going to feel so great about it you're not going to feel special about it it can be writing a letter to let's say Santa Claus right or I don't know because just because you know something that you've always kind of wanted to do or youve just been feeling like doing it or like in my case it was moving I I feel like that was a bad example but what I tried to say is it can be anything right and while
you're doing it you're going to feel like a this is kind of stupid I know and then you you know you just do it but let's say you never hat Santa as a child can be so my kind of let's call it Canon event so far is it's not a Canon event but my thing right now is having moved away from home really far away and just trusting that everything's going to be fine and trusting myself and I didn't feel so great the first few weeks now I think I'm my I'm I'm on my fourth
week now yeah like a month now it's been a month holy [ __ ] that passed really quickly actually I passed insanely quick I could have had it very easy and nice and I threw all of that for this and I'm so happy now because I feel so free and it's been really [ __ ] painful I will not lie to you and maybe it still will you know there's still a lot of challenges to come but it didn't feel special in the moment you know it feels special now a month after which passed like
like you know I still to me it still feels like I've been here like two weeks you know um but it was really painful it was a lot of disassociating and then getting it all at once and just a lot of following my instincts and following my instincts and trusting my instincts you know and I think it's great it's the best thing I've ever done going towards the uncomfortable the uncomfortable that you choose there's nothing like it and I remember now when I was 15 or 16 I did just that I moved to Germany to
finish my school and that was my choice it was my uncomfortable choice and I did that and I remember I felt so free when I did that now I'm doing it again and it's like holy [ __ ] but just like better cuz I'm older and I'm like completely like on my own now for real you know wow it's just there's so much to learn and to work on and that's the best part you know it's it's incredible you know and my days can go from it starts amazing to just turning shitty because of work
work is probably the thing that annoys me the most at the moment I'm I'm letting it steal my happiness at the end of the day it's it's all about remembering the things I've learned and I realized the past relationship I was in and the whole family and work I I had no balance for myself and it it just wasn't enough about me it wasn't and accepting myself and what I believe in and what I want and how I operate and uh it's really nice that now I am starting to just turn my back on people
that don't let me operate the way I operate because I've been putting myself on fire to keep others warm and to keep their image their image about me intact and that is absolute [ __ ] [ __ ] if there's one thing that I will not do and it'll take more more time but I will not keep people's expectations of me either the same or lower or higher or what we want and I will not let other people's image of me dictate my life anymore it's a very scary process for me there's something in there
man it's just pure confidence pure it's like like I knew it you know or they knew it Gods I don't know you know what's best for you that doesn't mean you need to hide away from The Real World no no no no no go out and confront everything not all at once but confront like jump in the cold water and you know what's best for you you know what your comfort food is you know what your comfort show is you know what you need you just have to have the balls to ask for it to
say hey actually I'm sorry or no actually I'm not sorry but uh I don't want to go out tonight I don't want to hey actually I'm having a really terrible day and I just feel bad and I'm sorry I I need a break or help or when you're alone and you say no I'm not going to do this right now just just take control of your life that way by having courage in knowing what's best for you put yourself in the uncomfortable situation take the risk and have the courage to ask for what you need
to fall just to just be you be yourself in that way jump in the cold water be yourself and see how you will change into your into into that Vision you had as a kid the coolest person you thought existed that probably wasn't even real and that's who you'll slowly be [Music] becoming and don't cringe don't really cringe at your past have respect for that person that you wear because they made you who you are now and who you're now will make you who you were who you're going to [Music] become then just there's this
thing I have I've got big trouble with starting just getting started but I'm I'm I'm tackling that as well now whatever it is that you want to do right the I a I don't know can be an athletic thing a musical Thing a computer thing a mathematical thing a theory thing um business I really don't care it can be the most boring thing ever that people people say it's boring right first of all I want to make something very [ __ ] clear like very [ __ ] clear I could never hate on anybody who
does what they do for the living lives their life how they live and are happy with it and are doing good if you love your 9 to5 and your scheduled life or semi schedul life and a stable life my God God bless you I could never ever be mad at that ever I actually have a ton of respect for that I think that is amazing you cannot hate on others who are happy with how they're living their life that is just purely insecure it shows that a a you're not happy with how you're living your
life and B that you're so insecure of how you're going to of of the fact that you're going to get to where you want to get right let's say you want to become Superstar you you don't believe that you're going to become Superstar so now you have to you know someone who's happy with what they're living you need to tell them now [ __ ] you you should be wanting more yeah right whatever it is that you want to do the way I want you to start is to do the least amount of work the
most imperfect outcome of that and finish it put the least amount of work in that you can make it as imperfect as you can and here's the third and best part just follow Your Instinct do it for yourself do it for you don't do it for anybody else's to see do it for yourself because you want to do it finish that project that can be whatever it is for yourself and finish it and if it's something that you need to post or if it's something that finishes by presenting it if it's something that is just
presented to the world how it is cu one day when you're going to be there at that top and I mean defined top as however you define being at the top is like because that's all that matters it's your definition you're going to look back on that first project that you brought into the world and gave life to you and you're going to say wow look how how far I've come I'm proud of myself bad time
