25 Minutes of Mock Trials in Suits

Sydney Thompson was a consultant with londers global initiative she had a few too many and decided to entertain her friends with an impersonation of her boss Lena lenders this impersonation was recorded and uploaded onto a social networking site the next day she was fired Sydney is now suing for wrongful termination we are looking to see can't cheat your way out of this one Partners have been instructed to only use the Associates in emergency situ uations let the games begin all right when your name is called please step up and meet your match you think you

mean my Louis Jean Kaplan I'm glad Jessica finally chose a case with a strong female character last year I was forced to play a traffic cop it's a total waste of my talent wait a minute you play Witnesses oh I don't play anything I am body if I'm on your team you're a winner in that case no Kyle Durant Mike [Applause] Ross Mike Ross Mike Ross Kyle for the plaintiff Ross for the defendant you're the best man left oh by the way Kyle weren't you a national M trial Champion that's right leis in high school

college and last school let's settle or I could beat you the plaintive has shown a pattern of making derogatory statements about my client not the emails which have no tone of voice and are subject to interpretation which is exactly why your argument is shaky at best then beat me in court Kyle there is a reason that Harvey chose me to be his guide you really want to find out what that reason is and how do I know this isn't some sort of trick it's not a trick this is our chance to stand out look settling

gets us in and out of there in 5 minutes you drop the suit and you and I spend the rest of the week making ourselves indispensable to the partners while everyone else buries their heads in Candy Land Court I'm going against my better judgment trusting you shall we have a deal Council for the plaintiff and I agreed to a settlement yesterday he must have understood we had discussed but I never agreed to anything do you have a signed agreement I'm no then we are ready to proceed you have the floor thank you on March 31st

2010 Sydney Thompson was unwittingly recorded on cell phone she made a joke the type of joke that I'm sure every person in this courtroom has made at one point or another yet she was she was only hey are you okay now you care Mr R I'm going to have to ask you not to speak to my client she is not your client she is Rachel the pargal and I only have 5 minutes so you should really get out of my face what's your problem Mike my problem is that you don't have the balls to make

this a fair fight Kyle lawyering isn't about fighting fair and you better watch your false accusations or I might just sue you for defamation the defendant wishes to found or Sue on what grounds I believe that's my line counselor defamation of character the plaintiff's video negatively impacted the perception of Lena lunders and impaired her financial well-being that's ridiculous your honor in order for there to be defamation that the the statements made would have had been false that's not the case here then you should have no problem proving that in court counter suit is allowed are

you serious would you like to approach the bench and find out how serious I am your honor the defense should have filed counter claims before the trial began yes he should have but no one in this crop of Associates had the foresight to do so and we drafted a whole addendum just because we assumed one of you would so I'm going to allow it do you have a problem with that no your honor this is now a defamation trial you have until Friday to [Music] prepare nice recovery thinking on on your feet but you wouldn't

have had to if you hadn't been so naive thank you your honor we were co-workers we started at the same level and then I was promoted to be her immediate Superior and do you know about the video in question yes I was at the party that night and what were you celebrating that night my promotion same night it's interesting Miss janess what did you think of the impersonation it was too far it was mean so why do you think Miss Thompson did it Miss lenders promoted me Sydney hated it and that's why she made the

video oh thank you Miss janess nothing further you're out did Sydney ever tell you that she hated your promotion not exactly yes or no please no well then how do you know that she hated your promotion I could just tell can you tell what I'm thinking right now that you're wish I would agree with everything you say no I was thinking that if you could actually read my mind I wouldn't bother asking you questions but you can't read my mind can you no I'm a managing director not a no and I'm pretty sure you can't

read Sydney's either and you actually have no idea why she made that video correct I guess I don't no what are you going to do ill will for my boss as matter of fact I to play the woman not the case you say you expected to be passed over for promotion correct yes and yet you applied three times yes and you were never promoted as I said yes and when Nora janess was promoted you wrote scathing emails to the rest of your co-workers in response not scathing the intent was to be funny oh right you

like to be funny who doesn't like to laugh someone whose reputation has been ruined objection just a thought it's testifying sustained Mr Ross questions I'm sorry your honor forgive me I was just trying to be funny on your performance review Lena wrote good work ethic lacks skills do you think that's a fair assessment fair I I don't know your co-workers were promoted and your boss was calling you mediocre are you mediocre no so why haven't you been promoted I don't know do you think you deserve better doesn't everyone so why haven't you tried I have

tried why haven't you improved I didn't say I haven't improved well your review did your 5 years with without a promotion did look you were so angry that you weren't moving forward that you lashed out at your boss made a out of her and everyone was moving past people making good on your potential people who could cut it I can cut it excuse me your honor settlement still on the table what let's settle same deal win-win no I'm good excuse me I've seen the dreamy looks Ross you like her so you're offering me a settlement

because you don't want to hurt her feelings but I'd rather see if you'll break her gety up Cowboy counselor would you like to proceed [Music] now your honor are you sure yes you're honor nothing further Well normally we'd move on to closing statements but it's been a long week and honestly we all know where this is going so court rules in favor of the defendant cour is adjourned need anything otherwise I'm going to head out celebratory drinks with the associates yep and what exactly are you celebrating you know what you can save the disappointment Harvey

I know what I did do you because what I saw is that you backed off because you were worried about hurting your girlfriend's feelings it was a fake trial all right I weighed the pros and the cons and I decided it wasn't worth hurting someone for the result the result is you just told every partner in this firm including myself that you have a weak stomach you don't have what it takes you know you keep telling me that I have to decide what kind of lawyer I want to be and if I were smart i'

probably be just like you because everybody knows you're the best but I'm also trying to decide what kind of person I want to be sometimes I like my my kind of person a lot more than yours you want to know what kind of person I am tough but fair I call it like I see it and what I see is a kid who ask for an opportunity still hasn't decided if he wants it or not [Music] [Music] have to say delicious dinner fantastic wine almost enough to make up for the mediocre company don't be too

hard on yourself you're not mediocre see that's funny because you were talking about me there it is the Spector smile what can I say it came with the name and you never fully dressed without a smile being fully dressed is overrated it is when you look like me Mrs Robinson are you trying to seduce me did you just call me Mrs Robinson okay first first of all I'm younger than an bankr an bankr was hot which brings me to second of all I'm hotter than an bankof I'm hotter than Dustin Alman not in Tootsie are

you afraid you're going to lose this thing no you should be why because Louis had one good direct you walk through life like men want to be you and women want to sleep with you I don't always walk sometimes I drive fast and it's exactly that kind of response that make the partners think you're an ass being an ass doesn't make me guilty of fraud if they're right about who you are what would make them think they'd be wrong about what you do why don't you tell me you're the expert on worm and fuzzies you

want to know how I know I wasn't the one to call you back because I know why I wasn't the one to call you back let me guess you didn't like me no I did but in all the time I knew you you never once showed me any vulnerability I told you how I felt about you but you never showed me so I had no way of knowing it's the truth and you could be telling the truth now but if you don't show the partner some emotion they're not going to believe you either what do

you want me to do manufacture a few tears look har when you're a defendant you need the jury to protect you there's no way they're ever going to protect you if they don't care about [Music] you the plaintiff would like to call Miss Donna pawson to the [Music] stand you got her to come in just stick to the script Arvey won't know what hit him Miss Paulson did Harvey Spectre order you to shred that document I declin to answer pursuant to my fifth amendment rights did you put your date stamp on that document I declin

to answer um I'm not going to ask questions that you're just going to plead the fifth two so had Harvey Spectre asked you to bury something 5 years ago would you he wouldn't ask me to do that's not what I asked if he did would you do [Music] it oh see you're pausing which means you're hiding something no I'm not see I think you do anything for him and I know why is there a question do you love Harvey Spectre what do you love him that has nothing to do with it has everything to do

with why'd your last boyfriend break up with you Miss Paulson why'd he end it with you he thought that I prioritized my work over our relationship your work he asked you to choose between him and Harvey didn't he yes who' you choose Harvey because you love him leis stop it is not that simple do you love him yes or no answer the question you're with him all the time you're work revolves around him your life revolves around him objection badgering you don't have a boyfriend but the one you did wouldn't share you with him your

honor please I just need do you love Harvey Spectre do you love Harvey Spectre that's enough [Music] permission to treat the witness as hostile permission granted he's hostile the day we met you were working in the mail room of this Law Firm I don't recall that day well let me refresh your memory an associate had missed a filing so he backdated the postage you came to me and you you said if the firm did not declare misconduct you would report us to the DA I don't like fraud it's no secret but what you did want

to keep secret was the fact that you told me why I didn't want to get in trouble no you did it because if we'd won an old woman would have lost her pension and if anyone found out that you were the one that told me then they'd know that you cared whatever you say you pretend like you don't care but you do you care about the people you work with you care about the people people you work for and you care about every one of your clients but you refuse to let people know is there

a question I just want to know why no answer are you embarrassed no afraid no then why just let it go no you are under then hold me in contempt for God's sakes what the hell happened to you what kind of damage was done to you caring only makes you [Music] weak they think you care they'll walk all over you you weren't weak the day you walked into my office you were a man who believed that to win fairly was more important than to win and you still are and and I've never seen anyone walk

all over you uh is there a question here your honor no there [Music] isn't Mr lit do you resent Harvey Spectre it's complicated no it's simple do you resent him for being better than you he's not better than me I understand it's so much easier to criticize someone else than it is to acknowledge your own shortcomings shortcomings my billables are higher than his my client list is better than his I didn't ask you about those things what are you asking Miss Pearson does the witness resent my client yes your own ambition aside do you think

Harvey Spectre deserves to be seen your partner yes or no yes do you think he's an excellent attorney yes and as much as you hate him do you think he committed this fraud [Music] no defense rest this case is about nothing more than cold hard inuendo and the fact fact is I'm capable of reciting every element of jurist prudence in the state of New York and yet despite that the prosecution is going to try to convince you that I am a fraud who not only didn't pass the bar or go to law school he didn't

even graduate college there is in one piece of Hard Evidence proving that I didn't go to Harvard Law there is no record of tuition being paid no record of a Boston address there isn't even a simple picture in the yearbook let's talk about the yearbook as he told you I'm not in the yearbook where is Mike Ross now what he didn't tell you is that 25 other students are also not in this yearbook are those other students being charged with fraud of course not because we don't put people on trial for being sick on picture

day and no matter what he says the fact is Mike Ross is not a lawyer he's a fraud and we will prove that beyond a shadow of a doubt the defense would like to call its first witness right there he's such a non- lawyer he doesn't even know the prosecution goes first and you obviously don't know Jarvis V the state of New York 1937 when calling of the first Witness is of such special nature as to disrupt the flow of the trial once it started what the hell special nature are you talking about when the

defense wants to call the prosecutor as its first witness Harvey unless you have something to overturn this I'm going to need you to have a seat Mr insector you said there's no record of me ever having an apartment in Boston can you explain to the jury why there's no record of you ever having lived there I'm not the one on trial here no you're not you're the one in that chair so why don't you answer the question or we can stop this whole thing right now there's no record of me living there because I sublet

up there when I have my place down here so it is possible that a person not have a Boston address without it meaning that they didn't attend Harvard great thank you so much this witness is excused what exactly is your reason for not having an address up there unless you're too afraid to answer my questions no I'm not afraid of you at all my reason is that I chose to live with my friend Trevor during that time the only problem with that is your friend Trevor has lived in Brooklyn his entire life exactly a 3-hour

and 20-minute drive from Harvard so you saying you made that drive every day no I only went up for tests because that's all I had to do I guess you needed some extra tutoring huh you expect these people to believe that you graduated from the most competitive Law School in the world without ever going to class see that's funny because you actually expect these people to believe that I never went to law school at all and yet still somehow managed to convince the smartest lawyers in the world to make me their youngest partner ever whose

story is looking more farf now oh no answer great no more questions your honor I don't know if you've noticed this or not but he's kicking your ass and I'm about to kick back are you two discussing something that defense should be made aware of just talking about the Knicks now is the prosecution ready to call their first witness the prosecution's first witness is this affidavit from every single member of the defendant's supposed graduating class objection your honor I I haven't seen that well then let me read it to you we collectively come forward to

swear the following regarding Michael James Ross we never saw him we never knew him we never heard of him and it makes us sick that he's taking the good name of Harvard Law School and throwing it down the toilet please find him guilty on all counts your honor I move to strike that document right now on what ground on the grounds that it's completely fabricated where's your proof besides the fact that I actually went to Harvard there's no way you could have contacted all of those people since last night then I suggest you call every

one of these people and put them on the stand but when you do every single one of them is going to look you in the eye and say who the hell are you what no Snappy comeback you can try to trick these people all you want but the fact is you didn't go to Harvard and this proves it objection he's testifying what I'm doing is winning is a prosecution ready to call its next WI prosecution calls Rachel Zayn objection your honor the witness cannot object to testifying simply because she intends to take the F witness

doesn't have to testify because she's my wife what I have a marriage certificate here from the state of Nevada showing that the witness and I were married in Las Vegas 6 weeks after we started dating both of you up here now where the hell did you get that what do you mean he didn't marry her and you know it then why do I have everything I need proving I did because he did some Bullit to get out of this oh look who's crying about it now keep your voices down you think this is a joke

you try this in court Gibbs is going to prove you're not married and Rachel's going to go to jail for perjury he's right you better know what the hell you're doing who said that I was going to use this in the real trial I get it this is a fake just like you I said keep your Goddamn voice down this is as real as that affa David was okay now you wanted to Rattle me I've rattled you what are you going to do about it prosecution calls Rachel's an to the St objection we just went

over this when spousal privilege is invoked in the moment prosecution has the right to challenge the validity of the marriage this is ridiculous objection overruled Miss Zay take the stand we can skip swearing her in since she's just going to lie about it anyway objection Miss Zane if you got married 6 weeks after dating the defendant why are you engaged to him right now because we did it on a whim and we' planned to have an analment but once we fell more in love we thought that it might be wonderful to reveal it to our

families after we were married again and how exactly did it go when you got married the first time we were in Las Vegas yeah yeah I don't give a where you were what color was your dress what color was the cake objection who was there were there any Witnesses your honor wit and what godamn time was tell me right now let the witness answer the dress was white and the cake was Vanilla with a buttercream frosting it was a small ceremony at around 1 p.m. and I remember the man who married us like it was

yesterday because it was the the most special day of my life and when you came up with this story did Mr Ross at least give you the courtesy of letting you make up your own memories of your supposedly sacred day objection since if he represents himself at trial you won't have a real wedding for at least 2 to 5 years Harvey and I've got one more question did you vow to remain faithful to Mr Ross throughout your marriage yes I did yeah then I guess when you cheated on him with Logan Sanders it means you

lied to him at that non-existent ceremony just like you're lying to all of us right now that's enough if you want to bring more outside information to dispute this marriage feel free but for right now this witness is excused [Music] [Music]