He Cut His Throat, Went to Hell | Crazy Testimony of Near Death Experience

Welcome everyone uh to this episode and to this interview I believe that your life will be enriched I also believe that today a scale is going to fall off from your eyes today I have the opportunity to have with me physically uh evangelist uh Steve who is in a pastoral role God is using him he is touching the world today not only through his testimony but his heart for Souls but it hasn't been always like This for him um he has a book that's coming out8 hours in hell and he had this crazy experience where

he was seeing a grandpa was showing up and telling him to he needs to go and follow this Grandpa who turned out it wasn't a grandpa but it was a a spiritual entity and he end up actually killing himself and went to hell and so you're going to hear about that and if you um know anybody who doesn't know for sure if hell is real or Heaven is real um you're About to experience something very powerful I first heard his testimony on a documentary on near-death experiences and out of all the testimonies on that do

Mentor this um testimony really touched my heart and so ever since then I I've stayed in contact with Steve and today my joy and honor to welcome you to our podcast yes thank you Pastor Vlad it's an honor to be here I'm a big fan of yours too so yeah the blessing is mine the honor is yep so Steve if we can Go to the beginning yes how was your childhood like and what kind of a Faith and family of brining were you raised up yeah Pastor Vlad my childhood was uh in spent in South

Korea and from the age of six I actually started to uh really attend the Buddhist temple uh with the you know guidance of my grandparents MH my father mother grandparents on both sides were um radical Buddhists okay so from the age of six uh you know I was I was asking questions like why are we Born what's the purpose of life why is there inequality why are some people rich and others poor so to seek spiritual answers from a very young age uh I was in the temples and grew up as a very fervent Buddhist

trying to reach Nirvana actually okay and eventually around the teenage years you your family immigrated to United States MH yeah um at the age of nine I immigrated to Boston uh my mother is a registered nurse so she got recruited to Boston to Be a nurse there um so yeah I had to leave South Korea and enter uh come to America and you mentioned also that um these years were very difficult for you because you had a hard time fitting in and there was a lot of insecurities new country new language yes yes in Boston

um back in the late 1980s uh there was not too many asian-americans and a lot of racism and especially I was in the countryside of Boston as well in a small town called Beford with about 10,000 people um so yeah there was a lot of identity crises I always told my mom I was like Mom how come I'm the only Asian kid in the school how come I look different and my mom was like you know strict Korean mom I remember her kind of like beating me with a book like that traumatized me but I'm

Healed from that now by the Lord did that eventually as you started to grow up yes did those insecurities and that rejection did it push you were you Still practicing Buddhism when you were in the United States yeah not as much Pastor Vlad I was um because there's no temples I try to pray once a week here and there but it was very hard to maintain you have to understand like when you go to a temple you have the image the monks helping you so it was like uh I was trying to imagine what Buddha

was like it was very harder a lot harder to practice the faith but I try to stay loyal you know so I wouldn't go To church Church my other friends would invite me to church but I kept saying no cuz you were loyal to yeah IED to and for those people who are maybe not aware of what is Buddhism can you give us just a basic kind of understanding around down and uh what what do Buddhists believe and what do they practice yes as a very uh devout student of Buddhism I was being mentored and

trained to become a monk myself um so I was training I was I was being trained and and just really Studied it you know day and night um one of the key tenants or beliefs of the buddist system is there is no beginning or end there is no supreme god you become God everything was and is and always will be and has been which doesn't make sense um you know philosophically and logically I can explain that later because in Buddhism you have to Traverse an infinite amount of time to reach a finite point which is

you know metaphysically mathematically Impossible when they tell you there was no beginning you always existed and you always will exist a reincarnation has always been and it always will be it doesn't make sense you know in that sense but in Buddhism there's no concept of original sin so you have to um so there's no they don't know where sin comes from they don't know which gods are above which one like demons and angels there's no clear demarcation so heaven and hell like you go there and Come back so it's like a mumbo jumbo of spiritual

beliefs but one thing they do unite around is the fact that the purpose of all religion humanity is to reach nirvana so I was like what's Nirvana and the monks go it's being all alone by yourself you reach eternal life and you don't need anyone you don't need anything and I was like that sounds kind of bad like I'm G to be alone for the rest of my life forever and ever but they're like that's like that's how you Escape suffering okay and then they said you need to pray for millionair to reach nirvana so

I was like man I got to start now they're like yeah you better start now so I was in the temples eight hours a day on the weekends how old were you I was um this is when I moved back to South Korea so uh I was in Boston for 6 years from the age of um 9 to 15 145 and I moved back to Korea around 15 to 18 yeah so during my sophomore junior senior in high school I was in Korea Practicing Buddhism a lot more uh passionately trying to reach nirvana try to

reach nirvana yeah add to your years of prayers and and all of that and then so you come back from South Korea to United States how did your introduction to the kind of wildlife begun yeah so I moved back and forth twice from South K to like the US like you just said and I I applied to all these schools in the Northeast but I got to Pomona College in in in the Los Angeles area and when I Came there um being a Buddhist you know there's sin but like it's okay to party you it's

kind of weird like there's no clear right and wrong so I had no qualms about it I thought it's part of life but um I was partying just like everybody else in college you know discovering adulthood but things kind of took the wrong turn my sophomore year in college where um my father who was a very wealthy man uh Korea went through Asian financial crisis in 1998 and he calls me And says Steve like I have no money for you I was like that's a that's funny that you have drivers homes businesses and he goes

no Steve we lost everything not just me but the whole country I don't even have money for you to fly back to Korea so you need to find a place to live so I actually found a place to live and that place was I found out later a drug dealing Party Center um so that's how um I got into more um more harder drugs it wasn't just weed I Started doing some ecstasy and methamphetamine and eventually the death bow why why did you start doing drugs was just kind of like you know you had no

more money you were in that place a Temptation and the the view this religious view that you were holding on to which simply you know you're trying to reach nirvana but at the same time it's not bad to have fun or was there some kind of a void that you were trying to escape and fill in your heart through Those drugs yeah Pastor VL for me um drugs was just another um like substitute for um like joy and pleasure so I thought it was just the next step from cigarettes to alcohol to drugs I had

no qualms about it was I empty and was that the exact reason why I did drugs no it was just there it was always there this was a drug selling house we smoked it in the morning afternoon evening I thought it was just part of life MH um I didn't even like getting High it was just always there and I don't remember being sober that entire summer but in deep inside I felt a lot of fear I remember like insecurity even more than my childhood as I did the drugs I think it was having an

impact on me but I didn't know so I ended up um doing harder drugs because it was just the crowd I was in but just to relate to the audience yeah yeah I did it to have fun you know um and it did get rid of the depression and the sadness Temporarily very you struggled with depression I believe I started to because in Buddhism I remember um you know the reason why I pray so hard was to escape all these emotional confusion to escape fear of evil spirits to escape a fear of death because once

you reach nirvana the monks teach you you will be free from all everything else humanity is free from you become God so I was like you know what that sounds like a good deal so um if if drugs can do that Temporarily I thought it was maybe part of the process process but I did suffer from depression especially during the summer when I was doing drugs every day and afterwards I felt the effects mhm so talk about that week when you when you did that death ball mhm yeah I I I know many of your

listeners know the story already but um for those who never heard I smoked the death bow which is a street slang word for just a combination of heroin cocaine and PCP so it looks like Regular just you know regular weed like the bowl of weed but they spray on stuff they're very deadly drugs it's not as deadly as fentanyl but everyone who smokes it um you know for the listeners 50% of herin users end up dying Comm committing suicide and selling all their Furniture to get the next tie that's how powerful a heroin is so

when I smoke this lace drug um I set it for 10 straight days so for 240 um straight hours Pastor Vlad I Sleep I did not get one moment of rest I remember being awake awake awake and I didn't I Tred to get sleep uh and I pray more to Buddha to get rest and you know drugs and Buddhism is a very bad combination uhhuh and then what happened then when did you started to get these visions and invitation to end your life yeah so that happened I'm near the end of the summer of 1998

so so here I am in the beginning of the summer at this drug house getting high every day towards the End the drugs started getting stronger and I remember right after after summer break ended I came back to school is when I met a random brother who who was also at that school and he gave me that drug and when we smoked it he goes I got some really good stuff was his words and we just went to a house and we were smoking and the first time I took it I was like wow this

feels different my anxiety fear uh confusion just multiplied and then around the fifth day Of staying up Pastor VL I know what time it was what day it was I looked at myself in the mirror and the drug was so strong I could not even recognize myself and the Terrors that I felt was just multiplying and my friends were like Steve you look different you don't usually look this you know confused and and tired you're very you're a little social and I was like yeah I don't know what's going on guys and then and then

around the 6 seventh day I went back Home and said Mom something's wrong and around the eth day I wrote her a letter because I had that visit now from the Asian Grandpa he came to me and he goes was this the first time yes he goes you must be suffering if you offer yourself to me as a Living Sacrifice I will give you 50,000 less years of hell and I said you know what that's a good deal and then I'm going to well were you thinking you're going to go to hell yeah I think

Was that buddhism's teaching that you will go to hell as a default destination yes in Buddhism um in Buddhism there's a lot of um uh options that happens you can go to heaven you can get reincarnated you can go to hell and I knew at that time that um that my end wasn't going to be good and just the suffering was so intense here on Earth I felt like if I could escape this it's going to be worth it because after like six seven eight days of not sleeping Straight you're not in your right mind

I believe what it's what's called in the Bible demon possession I believe now upon reflection and reading the Bible now um that I was possessed by a spirit of suicide one of the highest forms of I think evil spirit attack on young people so this Grandpa Asian Grandpa tells you that you will get uh 50,00 th years less in hell if you do what if I offer myself as a sacrifice to him so the deal he comes to me and makes is if you give Yourself to me I will spare you 50,000 less years in

hell but I don't really know what happens after that but I was like thinking you know what that sounds a lot better than what I'm going through now so I did the math three minutes of pain for 50,000 L years of hell then it's worth it so I went to the kitchen but I wrote my mom a letter first I said Mom I'm so sorry that I failed you in this life I'm gonna go ahead of you and she read and and I will see you in the Next life and she just was weeping I

remember her reading that letter and just crying and she's like Steve you're not going to die like let's pray more to Buddha again a very you know you open another demonic door around the ninth day I'm like planning now like where should I do this so does he keeps showing up to you and reminding you or that's just kind of more like a initial invitation yeah there was that initial to offer yourself as a living and you Knew what that meant is you had to end your life yeah I just knew in my spirit he

wanted me to kill myself and secondly I knew that um um when I I felt like if I did this I could escape the pains that I was going through and the effects and then have less than 15, 50,000 years in hell yes yes so um what I did was I after writing my mom a letter the next day I went to the kitchen I found the biggest knife I could find and I got on my knees and you Know I've never attempted suicide and the grandpa he came to me once but after that it

was just this constant tug constant thought I I have no control over my thoughts my choice my emotions I just felt like already you know life is done I was living but not really alive you know the Bible plus not sleeping for like nine nine days at this time yeah there's a movie star named Jet Lee he was Buddhist and I heard he stayed up like eight days to make a movie straight He meditates I beat him by two days I was I was there for 10 straight days and on the 10th day I was

said Now's the Time to do I I went the kitchen I grabbed the biggest knife I could find I got on my knees and then um and I you know I've never attempted suicide before I've never done this before so I was like do I cut it this way do I cut it that way so I'm trying to think about the least painful way to do it as I'm thinking uh I got my jport bag and I Thought maybe I could take some of this stuff to the Nether world so I put my Buddhist Bible

my wallet in there I was like maybe I can buy stuff that's how ignorant I was of afterlife oh my goodness you know but now we know cuz I read the Bible and Jesus Christ taught me the truth which set me free but you know the Bible says the Devil comes to steal kill destroy and here he is stealing killing and destroying my life my poor mom walks into the living Room while I'm trying to find the right angle and she goes oh my gosh she goes back into her room calls 911 this is happening

in the City of Irvine California so there's a lot of cops there Pastor V very safe City it's ranked the safest city in America uhhuh maybe not spiritually so they they walk into the room within a few minutes and there was a whole Squad of them they go put the knife down and I was like I can't put the knife I got to do this now The Asian Grandpa's talking to me he goes it's now or never so I went for it and I put I put the knife in my stomach and actually went through

but not as deep as I wanted to and and I stabbed myself repeatedly and you saw the scars and it was painful but now they're jumping on me they're macing me whacking me with the bat and the Grandpa's like you got to do faster faster so I went for the neck and I stabed my neck about I think about 13 15 17 times blood Squirting out I found out later the artery was cut um and my mom told me after you know I I woke up from a coma in the surgery she said Steve the

entire living room was covered in blood there was not one spot that was not covered in red and I was like is that possible and then the cops U are hitting me but I was under the influence and the power of drug so I didn't put the knife down I kept wrestling there's like three or four of them on me but when they ma me That's when I uh dropped the knife passive V you don't want to get maced I pray no one gets maced that that pepper whatever I nose and I was like oh

I can't do this anyway I dropped a Knife by now I'm cut up everywhere um losing blood and and I'm being carried out on a stretcher and in the back of an ambulance and heading to the U Medical Center and I started having what they call OB Out of Body Experience I'm going in and out in and out of Consciousness Uh I had an nde which is a near-death experience where I knew my life was done but as I'm entering and exiting it's like what the heck like I think I'm going to hell I I

just have this feeling were you seeing your body as you were exiting your body yeah yeah I was I was I was going in and out seeing myself in the in the in the um emergency room my mom was there holding my hand I'm going in and out of my body I see myself go back in I'm in Eternal eternity coming Back to the temporal world so I'm just going back and forth two different Realms back and forth and there was came a time where I just didn't come back to to my body and I

started sinking and I felt like I was just falling down an elevator but it just never went back up the horror of sinking is like like oh wow this is this is it I'm heading towards the Eternal something the agent Grandpa's gone cuz I was going to ask him questions like what's next you know Like are you going to show me heaven after or M but he's gone and I'm just by myself just sinking and sinking and I sink roller coaster falling El Falling by never going back up and and and boom I land and

and I look around Pastor Vlad and uh and you got to understand as a Buddhist I was a pretty good person I never sold uh bad drugs you know I sold weed but you know someone's going to sell weed right I've never hit anybody when they were Fighting I always watched U I lied and cheated but like for a good reason it was a always a soft fly you know a sweet lie so in your worldview you you consider yourself a good person yes yes I've never thought myself as a sinner that deserved hell I

always thought I'm good enough to go to heaven I'm good enough I'm better than the other Sinners I if there is a heaven you would be there yes yes but here I am in Hell which I don't believe in and when I Landed there Pastor Vlad this place has no light you know there's light right right now there's no plants it's dirt everywhere dry ground it was um and it was I was not alone it was so crowded so many people there so I didn't know hell was going to be I don't even believe in

hell but here I am and there's many people there and the demons are not small like the on that are sitting on your shoulder like eat the cookie don't eat the cookie these things were huge Like three four five stories tall they had capes on I knew there were gods in this place and they were in charge of this place and no one had to teach me I just supernaturally knew I looked to the left there's a huge Cliff of just rocks there's no plants like dry cracked walls everywhere like purplish rocks like like purple

dark rocks I look up it's just pitch black like how could this pace be so dark and the pain that I felt spiritually emotionally physically Socially whatever was was just magnified 30 60 H hundredfold it's something no human being should experience because at least on Earth there's a little bit of God there's God common Grace what the Bible calls for all types of people sunlight food at least there's an end to pain but here in Hell there's no end it's constant pain Eternal separation from God and I look to the left it's crowded I look

to the right it's crowded I Remember once too when I looked briefly there was like a chain going through my stomach and it really hurt and I was like oh my gosh that hurts and there's no there's so much pain you can't ask the person in front of you like how you doing what's your name you're just in agony and for the first time I knew in my existence that I was a sinner I just supernaturally knew that I was a sinner yeah I deserve to be here I'm a bad person I deserve to be

here of course I Deserve to be here and I don't even know why I just knew I was a sinner number two I supernaturally knew this place is going to be forever never getting out of this place Pastor Vlad I have I I'm going to be here forever so by God's grace I tasted Eternal death for I don't know how long I mean physically it was 8 hours but it felt like 15 20 minutes mhm and so did you interact with anybody there did they say anything to you did these demons also um like did

they hurt You there yeah to be frank with you like I said there was no way I could say hello I'm just in agony like burning like like were they also in agony yeah but I don't even look at their face you're just so in so much pain all you can think about is yourself and the pain and you just see the demons we had no chance to talk I don't remember saying any words in there I was just in pain yeah and then the demons didn't talk either but they were walking around and They

were just kind of looking around and I was like wow these things are powerful they're going to torture me like they're Gods and I'm going to be here forever so now I know from the Bible That's the hell that the Lord speaks of how did you exit that place yeah so uh so eight hours they're working on you in a hospital they're uh trying to bring you back to life and you're pretty much descended into this place where you instantly go from Thinking you were a good person to knowing right away hey I am I

am a sinner who doesn't deserve to go to heaven but I deserve to be in hell yes the reality of this is not going to end penetrates your heart um what happened next yeah yeah that's exactly what I was feeling Pastor vlot what happened next is nothing short of a miracle and the grace of God um so my mom had one Christian friend which was the mother of the drug dealer's house that I was in She was praying that I would get saved and preach the gospel to her son and her lost friends but she

was Christian she went to a very powerful Church spirit filled called Grace Ministries International in philon California where two years later I got baptized and became a pastor about 10 years later there as a youth pastor and in this place um they this one local church by the grace of God founded by Pastor David Kim who's in heaven now um they planted 10,000 churches and baptized 1 million people one local church and I know why now because even when I was going through this they sent their prayer team eight of them came pastors and intercessors

they came into the emergency room at the UCI Medical Center at the request of uh you know Mrs Kim the friend's mom MH she sent them cuz my mom called her and said what do I do my mom so why didn't she call the Buddhist friends we did call the Buddhist friends You know what their answer was Pastor it was shocking they go we're doing a silent prayer this week out of all the weeks they never they always helped me until you know they actually never really helped me but they're like this time they're doing

a silent prayer this week what timing right they're like we we cannot talk to you in the spiritual world we cannot talk to now I was like that stinks cuz we I need your help now and so your mom reaches out to this Friend so but isn't that like a betrayal of Buddhist faith when you reach out to Christians to help you pray or when you're desperate there's no atheist in a foxhole kind of yeah yeah exactly so my mom was like anyone that's going to help me is the real deal now and she's she

told me after the fact like she's like you know Steve I started doubting Buddhism the minute you attempted suicide wow why isn't Buddha helping my son when we're praying to him for so Many years and especially you Steve you prayed like eight hours at day to budha he should be helping you out all the people so she was so disappointed and she was a non-Christian fervent Buddhist like myself and she started to doubt the faith and then she calls her Christian friend cuz she's the only one that picked up the phone and said Mrs Kim

I mean Mrs Kang my mom this is spiritual warfare my mom goes spiritual what spiritual Warfare and she goes let's pray and she goes yeah I'm open can our church come she goes please send them they come to the medical center later I found out they pray for me for eight hours Lord save so I you know you could be calvinist God predestines you Armenian well you choose God I don't care prayer changes Eternal Destiny wow prayer changes the fate of Nations individuals you see all over the Bible we're not fatalist in Buddhism everyone's a

Fatalist where your past life kind of determines your present course of life it's a summation of that but in Christianity you change Destiny prayer brings Revival prayers prayer brings people are supposed to go to hell to heaven so they pray for but how medically were how bad things were medically for you yes medically Pastor Vlad I talked to the doctor later after I woke up and um the doctor say Steve it's a miracle your Al we actually had To do two surgeries on you instead of the Orin planned one because even though we started connecting

all the blood vessels your your heart rate blood pressure kept going down we thought we're going to lose you it's a miracle your life so I thanked him but I believe it was a prayer that guided the hands and the and the operation to be successful and here I am before you now so eight hours later you wake up yes and what what happened yeah so before I woke Up um I had a an encounter with Jesus but I did not see him yet I did not see him but I heard in my spirit no

more drugs no more Buddhism and I love you Steve in my heart were you in hell at the time when you heard no I was coming up as you're coming up yeah because um when I open my eyes I was so shocked that I was still alive I when I came back to Earth I was like oh my God I I got another chance open my eyes and I'm surrounded by The Prayer Warriors Looking at me and you know they were a little scared because you know I attempted suicide so the first thing that Pastor

I remember the female Pastor who was Spirit fill she looks at me in the ey she goes in Jesus name devil will be gone and I said I'm not the devil man and she goes good I just wanted to make sure and then she goes what did you see I tell her what I saw which what I share with you she goes you just saw hell and I was like yes I think I did and I said I don't want to go there she and I said what do I do she goes you need to

pray this this prayer so she has me say the sinner's prayer I repented and then and then and I'm like I still didn't feel peace I go ma'am can I pray that one more time she goes let's pray again so twice three times and I'm like man I still don't feel different she goes here here's a just read it so I it not four five six seven times Pastor V but I prayed that prayer 10 times that day 10 Times and that was my intr what you saw in Hell I mean you just wanted to

be sure yeah I wanted to be sure I'm never going back there wow yeah and then nobody else goes there actually that became a life-changing event that was my introduction to Christianity in the fall of 1998 yeah 1998 and so you come out of that and um how long did it take for you to recover and leave the hospital yeah so um the hospital visit so they put put me first in the psych unit you know for 10 days and then I came out right after that uh back back to home in about 2 weeks

but even though I was back home I was still having flashbacks I was still so sick cuz my legs were inflated my stomach was bulging out I think there was a lot of maybe infections going on I had my scars now uh I was not the same person I was super tired super fatigued so it took me a few months to recover physically but the good thing was from the local church they would start visi My home with like baked goods Bible studies like Steve it's us from the hospital I was like oh my God

my best friends right you guys are you guys are nicest people in the world like teach me the Bible so they brought they did a Bible study they're doing in the living room because I didn't have the energy to go to church yet they keep kept visiting me every day I was so touched by that I was like these Christians are so kind like they just met me they're putting Their lives on the line they're praying eight hours they come into the house and and we did Bible studies and I remember one around like the

first or second week of covery the pastor looks at me and goes now that the Lord saves you Steve what do you want to be and I don't even know I said this pastor lab I said I want to be a pastor and they go do you know what they they do I was like no but I owe it my life and they're like yes God called you and they started Prophesying over my life and and I remember in November which is about six eight weeks after the incident I remember some lady saying you know

what Steve even though you met Jesus now you need to meet the Holy Spirit you need to go deeper and I go what do I doing and he goes you need to uh go to The Prayer Mountain so I was like take me so that church that led me to Jesus they had a Prayer Mountain called Grace pray mountain in Corona California where they Have Services three times a day 6:00 a.m. 11:00 a.m. 8:00 p.m. at the pray Mountain yes and there was a pastor there named Pastor O who's like a spiritual father to me

and he was living at their pray Mountain about 200 people did a 40-day water fast there he himself did a 40 day water fast once a year and he and I went there and I was worshiping God and then and I heard all these people at The Prayer Mountain speaking in tongues And I was like what are they doing I want that Lord and I kept praying for a few weeks but I wouldn't get it and one day um the pastor he always anoints people three times a service three times a day he put his

hands on me and I just felt fire go through my body from my head to my toe just burning and and I think many Christians experienced that all across the face of the Earth that I baptized in the Holy Ghost I was rolling and rolling and rolling in the room And I grabbed my Bible which was the same Bible mhm but after he laid hidden with me I started speaking in tongues what I'm just yelling out in tongues and all the grandmas in the church are going oh you got it I go and I grabbed

the Bible and I started I just stood up and everyone's kind of praying and I said Sinners repent I I preached my first sermon in the church like possessed by the Holy Spirit and then and then I come back to my uh sleeping quarters and I Felt this peace and I knew insomnia and all the suffering was gone so i s slept like a baby that day for the first time and that was my first step of sign of recovery Pastor yeah so glory to Jesus that's so amazing this is incredible man that's just the

I feel the presence of God already as you're sharing this but you did have a stumbling though mhm shortly after that you you walked away or you you tripped up tell us about that what happened and and how did the Lord Kind of Bret you back yes um even with that experience of hell and being baptized in the Holy Spirit Pastor Vlad um as soon as I got healthy and went back to school the next semester in January I ended up uh meeting my old friends and they surrounded me were reading and they go Steve

now that you met Jesus like is it you know because they're not Christian some of them even went to church and they were partying and I was like that's the reason why I Didn't believe I saw the hypocrisy but I'm with them now and they go uh and then then they leave the restaurant and we're in the parking lot and they're like they're started smoking a cigarette and I go can let me get one they go no you met Jesus you can't have one I was like just give me one and then I backslid the

first day I was back out of the P Mountain oh and then I went back to a rave back to smoking weed back to the nightclub and I was kind of Surprised myself I was like how can someone see hell and go back to the world and and even my non-Christian friends like yeah Steve you shouldn't be here you shouldn't be here and I was like yeah you're right so but I was like you know what but out of context I read the Bible where it said God is is merciful so I said Lord he

says you're merciful let me party one more time and that became week after week so I went to church I was trying to share the gospel And during the season nobody came to Christ you cannot one can have one foot in the world and one foot in the church you have to go all in but nobody taught me that at least until that point so I'm partying and partying but week after week around April May the summer of 1999 Pastor V every time I went partying I got into a car accident car accident car accident

the most silly car accidents for example there was a shopping bag on the 10 freeway I thought it was a Shopping bag the close I got to it and it was I was coming out of a nightclub with my friend and I trying to witness to him I was like let's go clubbing he's like I'm so confused Steve I was like me too so we're driving on the freeway and the closer I get to the shopping bag it was a huge crater box I've never seen a crater box drop like that my Integra hits it

car spins boom we thought it was going explod we ran out of the car the Cops came I got rebuked by him I never saw that car again actually and then two other car accidents and I said Lord this is something's off I think you're calling me at the peak of my back sliding Pastor Vlad um Jesus visited me in a dream at the again at the season where I least deserved it he visited me and it was during the Great Tribulation and I just knew in my spirit where it was the end times the

whole world was being persecuted many Christians were Being arrested and killed I knew it was the the last of the last days and in this car in this dream me and my mom and my brother we we made it out like I knew we made it out of the Great Tribulation we are on top of a hill very high mountain later I found out this is in Revelation chapter 20 21 um the New Jerusalem M so we go there and we're on top of this beautiful Valley and I see the the greenest mountains and Meadows

and valleys a River running in the middle and a host of angels worshiping the father oh and they're just worshiping God and I was like wow the voice of this chorus of angels cannot be human it has to be angels and then the father God came to me as a ball of light sort of like the way he came to the Apostle Paul and he came as a ball of light pastor and he goes and and it was such a brilliant glorious light I can still I still remember it it was lifechanging and he And

he speaks and when God speaks he speaks the word he is the word his son's the word and he goes Jesus Christ is my beloved Son listen to him listen to him listen to him and I was like wow the ball of light speaks it's the father I just heard God the father's voice it was Majestic it sounded like many rivers and so much Authority about so much love I heard the audible voice of the Father God for the first time in my life and I opened up my Eyes and I said wow I just

I just heard the father's voice and I told my mom and dad and my brother and my dad goes yeah you better hear God's voice because you told me you're a Christian Steve and you're still partying my dad's like because of your lack of change in life I can't believe in God and I was so hurt by that wow my mother and younger brother accepted Jesus because they were there with me when that happened but my dad was in Korea and I was visiting him In Korea so I was like wow I got to repent

God spoke to me and that marked a change in my life of backsliding so I actually ended up withdrawing from school and went to The Prayer Mountain for this time not just for one month to get baptized in the Holy Ghost but I was there for a whole year wow learning how to pray three times a day I read the Bible at once a month I learned how to pray like a Buddhist but for Jesus now the Lord taught me little by little how To pray but it wasn't easy because I still wanted to go

back down there I think the Lord separated me for that time to get to really sanctify me yeah and I'm not perfect but what I learned is um when we say Lord my heart is not big enough to have two Gods wow can you get rid of everything else and take over my heart can you take all of it he will do it because I I try to cleanse my heart in Buddhism it's all about self-improvement I'm going to pray Harder try harder and I try so hard in chrisan the same tactics like I'm going

to pray more fast more I was so religious that when I opened the refrigerator I felt guilty like Lord should I eat today I fasted by force almost every day I was so unhealthy I was doing the coffee fast which I highly don't recommend you just drink coffee and nothing else you know and um and and I remember the striving that followed not just the first year but even the Next nine years wow and and and and during those nine years I Tred so hard to fight sin my own to be Holier just like Buddhism

even though I had the gospel nobody really taught me about surrender until I felt flat on my face trying and the Lord came to me so this dream that you had when you were during tribulation it really that Lord used that to to to bring you out of that backsliding yes sir yeah and then you go separate yourself because for you you Knew that if you really wanted to be anchored you can't go back to to those friends you know you're not too strong to evangelize to them they they're luring you in at this time

and so you you spend about a year but I like how you highlighted that that that just because you were on fire for God you still had unhealthy habits and and and person can look at that and say well that's good you're very disciplined but if that discipline is a residue of a Buddhist IC um Works um salvation really trying to you know earn it exactly that's not going to sustain you because there is really there's no you can run for a year maybe half a year but there's no sustain because only the grace of

God sustains us it's not our good works and and so you immersed yourself fully into Ministry you started to evangelize it was even one time you I think you went to uh China yes for like a month yes yes I went to China for actually initially For my whole life oh okay was your goal to go to I moved there Pastor VL cuz when I was in The Prayer Mountain uh I was under the covering and the authority of the Grace Church pastors and they say Steve now that it looks like your Life's a little

Sanctified the Lord's calling you to China I said he didn't tell me that and this was during the persecution time so I heard so many horror stories of getting arrested our church members Dying and I was like I didn't hear that but they're like out understanding you and I was I was a pretty obedient kid even as a Buddhist so I was like okay I'll go and so they're like you have to resign from your school and it was a pretty good school you know and they gave me a scholarship and I was like I'm

no I'm going to be an attorney and the Lord made it clear you're not going to be an attorney okay the world isn't aorist but we need workers of the Harvest I was like okay so this time I signed something but it was to leave Pomona College and moved to China um and my mom goes yes Steve like now that God saved you you know she's so thankful that I'm just alive she goes go die in China don't come back and I'm like what a yeah that's that's not so she was weeping sending me off

and as we're at the airport it was hilarious cuz there was like 20 of us like a Shorttime mission trip I'm not coming back there like I'm going there long term okay they're coming with me and by this time uh our church planted about a thousand small house churches under the persecution in China yeah so I was going to follow this Mission Nam missionary Lee and he was very famous and he was yeah Steve you know follow us around learn the ways of the Lord and when I got there it was so funny cuz they

go we have we're smuggling Bibles and I oh Good good for you guys and they go but you're the youngest one here look at us we're 40 50 if we go to jail we're going to have a hard time you're young you're 19 20 let's put the Bibles in your bag and I go oh I'm just a sacrificial there I knew there was a catch to this so they throw the Bibles in my suitcase as we're coming up I'm just like you know I'm so scared I'm like there's soldiers everywhere you know communist sold I

never been to China I'm like what am I Doing here they they come to my turn they open the bag they see the Bible and like the team waiting for me like we're praying for you like it's going to be okay I'm like the soldier picks up the Bible looks at it he opens it up he's like and he puts it back and he goes next I was like I was like I'm going to jail and and then that's when I realized either God blinded his eyes or it's it was not my time to go

to prison yet so that's how I came out of that and every 3 days we were escaping from the soldiers coming to a hidden service a underground church service the service there Pastor V like I think under persecution and Ukraine and Russian churches were so long you wake up at 600 people don't go home you worship till 8:00 well from 6:00 in the morning till 8 in the evening p.m yeah every day is like Bible study equipping and nobody wants to go home I remember the first day I got there the Holy Spirit was so

Thick in this Factory and they only meet like in large Gatherings when it rains so the soldiers don't hear the worship sound so you have to meet on a rainy day so we're here it's raining outside it was kind of symbolic and the Holy Spirit rain and I remember for the first time in my life I felt the Holy Spirit like on my face like like something just like and I was just weeping I was like wow I can physically feel the Holy Spirit not just spiritually but physically feel him Everyone's weeping there was like

300 underground church leaders there and there was a translator Korean Chinese and they're just going for it and everybody was weeping and I met 14year olds 14year olds who left their homes because their family kicked them out cuz they accepted Jesus and I said how old are you they go I'm 14 I go we a trans I go what do you do she goes oh I I oversee uh hundreds of churches I'm 14 I go how do you do that as a 14y goes Jesus equipped me I was like wow I need to learn from

these 14year olds so there was my introduction to Christianity in the mission field and then after about a 100 days the pastors looked at me and they go it's time for you to go back to America you saw everything to see in the underground China and I don't want to go back I my I got sent here by my family my church to die yeah they're like you're still alive the Lord shows you everything it's God's grace go back to America America get a degree become a ordained pastor and come back to China when you

have more skills when you're more when you can offer us more oh wow yeah and I said yes sir so I went back and yeah and then I start I became a church planter in America passive V wow this is see if this is so incredible and they know Jesus you have a lot more to share and um see if if somebody's watching right now and and maybe they have backslid or they don't know Jesus What would you tell them I would tell them them to take heart I learned something about the Lord Pastor V

during like you like during the past 25 years he's so faithful but he really honors uh surrender I would tell them hey maybe you backslid the past 10 years you thought you're not you're disqualify look at me if God can use a depressed anti-christian suicidal selfish Buddhist who's scared of everything to boldly preach the gospel now in mosques Everywhere he sends me I I'll preach in mosques Costco in and out wherever because the holy spirit's in charge not me I would tell that person uh your job is to just give your heart to him a

heart is not big enough for two Gods when you when you empty your heart he comes in and takes over all your heart it's the safest and best thing ever it's so much better than drugs the spiritual Joy he gives you you can't replace it he will give you the joy he will give you The peace and the Breakthrough you might be like well I'm not good enough then you're a perfect candidate blessed are the poor in spirit for there's the kingdom of heaven and the Lord says just come after me so I would tell

that person today's the day to surrender and you they might ask how do you surrender because I used to always ask that you got to tell them Lord take all of my heart it's dirty it's broken it's stained by sin it's been tainted by Generational curses pain from others I'm so offended Lord my heart's so fragile but here it is it's all I have but I give it to you and he gives you a new heart he gives you a new plan he breaks off every generational curse he fights for you and he guides you

in the narrow path of life because many are walking on the the wide Road of path of life that leads to hell and destruction I'll tell you Pastor vad hell was crowded heaven was not as crowded W hell was so crowded Heaven was not as crowded I don't know the percentage but a lot less crowded than hell which means we need to bring more people amen yeah we need to crowd Heaven amen anyone that repents and calls in the name of the Lord Jesus will be saved amen so multitudes will be saved amen amen and

now what is what are you involved in now where and how can people find out more about about your ministry or they want to join along with you yes yes uh yes Pastor um uh so I Found it so before I was in a local church a Korean church but the Lord had me go to a more International Church where because we're in America and I thank God for what the Pioneers did but um here now we founded a church planting movement called revive the Nations and the website is just all nations jc.org so it's

a Parish church but we are here to equip and Empower and serve the local Church pastors M and and raise up evangelism teams and also plant our own House churches and then we also started a a school of ministers not Ministry but School of ministers it's about the people yeah the Ministries should equip the people um so we have school of ministers and then I serve as a evangelist pastor at Jesus Center so yeah I know it's all over the place but it's trust me it's United it's one one and it's all the it's all

the body of Christ amen yes could you pray for people that are watching right now and Give them an opportunity Unity to come to Jesus or maybe there's someone who had an encounter with the Lord yes but like you kind of hasn't been discipled and Sanctified yet and they find themselves in that you know they're not effective in their calling because like you said your heart is not big enough for two gods and could you just pray for them right now that they will recommit and come back to the Lord yes I love to do

that be an honor to do so um Pastor Vlad because um the Lord Jesus he's the one that leaves the 99 sheep to find the one when he came to me at that hospital I didn't deserve it it's called Grace Grace means love love means it never fails it means faithful faithful faithful so if you're a a person seeking God I want to encourage you right now to CU God's using media powerfully so powerfully he he's in control of every social media every air wve he's in charge of every every uh TV station Every Ministry

so I want to pray for you and if you can repeat after me you can say say uh father God father God uh I'm a sinner I'm a sinner I deserve hell I deserve hell but I need you Lord I need you Lord I acknowledge you're my maker I acknowledge you as my maker and that Jesus Christ died for me that Jesus Christ died for me that you sent Jesus to Die For Me on the cross that you sent Jesus to Die For Me on the cross 2,000 Years ago, years ago for my past present

future sins for my past present sins my part is to surrender and TR trust my part is to surrender so I believe that Jesus died for all my sins I believe Jesus died for all my on that cross on that cross thank you for the blood of Jesus thank you for the blood of Jesus that makes me whole makes me whole brings me back to God brings me back to God and not only that I Surrender my life not only that but I Surrender my Life I Repent I repent and I surrender all I surrender

all I say Sorry God I say Sorry God it's time for you to take over it's time for you to take over be Lord be Lord and king of of everything in my life a king of every corner of my heart every corner of my life All My Life's events All My Life's events use it for your glory use it for your glory I worship you alone God I worship you alone my life will never be the same my life will never be as you give me a new Heart as you give me a new

heart and a new spirit and a new spirit I Repent I repent and believe in the gospel believe in the gospel in Jesus name I pray in Jesus name I pray amen amen and if you're a person who backslid hey you're looking at the ultimate backslider the first 10 years I try to put one foot in the world have hidden sins go back to Ministry you don't have to be a Christian schizophrenic we have two Natures but the Lord says take up the Cross every day and follow me it's a daily battle we fight till

the day we die that's what I learned from all the men of God and my spiritual fathers and mentors and those who are finishing well they fought every day does the battle get easier in the way does as you get older and you fight sin and develop Godly habits you become a warrior in the the sins they used to enjoy you enjoy less and less if you're 1% better than yesterday it's called sanctification and He's making you Holier this is the gospel guys where not only does he save you but he makes us holy but

without Holiness we cannot see the Lord I love what my sister Camille said she said man are you married you're committing fornication you going to hell for sure if there's hidden sins guys where you know there's Commandments in the Bible and you're disobeying please stop but but there's no strength to do it on your own so I want to really pray for you cuz Me too when I backslid try to have hidden sins it was so confusing and the Lord could not use me but when you say no to that and say Jesus help me

every day you pray every day you fight every day you get a holy addiction holy habit he makes you into a warrior that the devil fears and Shakes the gates of hell and it's for anybody you can be old Young Rich poor it doesn't matter male female any race so if that's you Christian Backslider God is calling you so if you can pray this prayer Lord I I need help Lord I need help for you to fight my sins for you to fight my sins by the Spirit by the spirit not by mind or strength

not by might or strength but by your spirit by your spirit take over every hour take over every aspect every aspect every area every area every corner every corner of my heart and life of my heart and life Holy Spirit help me to fight Holy Spirit help me fight every Day every and if I fall and if I fall help me to get right back up help me to get right back to confess my sins to confess my sins to the church to the church to get back up to get back up to be humble

to be humble accountable accountable transparent transparent and holy and holy by Your Grace by Your Grace it's a daily battle Lord daily battle and I'm not afraid of the fight I'm not afraid of the fight for you're fighting for me for you are fighting for Me so thank you Jesus so thank you Jesus for The Battle Belongs to You The Battle Belongs to thank you for cutting off the backsliding thank you for cutting off making consecrated Warrior making me consecrated for the gospel and your sake the go I lose my life I lose my life

for you and the gospel's sake for you and the gospel I give you my all I give you my all in Jesus mighty name in Jesus might name use me for the end time Harvest use me for end time Harvest amen And amen amen amen amen woo it's fire fire fire fire come on thank you Steve so much for sharing your story with us and everybody that's watching um let me know in the comments below as well share this with other people and you can go on the links below this video to learn more about

his ministry and keep growing in Jesus amen God bless you amen glory to Jesus Jesus