hi guys good morning so today I want to create something different on my channel so the thing is recently I have been I don't know why but I have been really stressed about making contents I just feel like I'm a little bit trapped somehow and uh anyway so I want to do something different today so basically I'm I want to make like um little series like four episode series talking about my life stories I just feel like I know like you might you guys might not be interested in it but I just feel like if
I don't include my stories in my channel I feel like there's something missing on my page and I want to make the picture like fuller anyway so I was like yeah I'm going to tell you about my story share with you my stories and then um I was like it's going to be a little bit boring if I just like sit there and talk so you are going to come hike with me today and I'm going to share with you my stories okay let's go so I actually wrote this article on August 8th 2022 so
a little bit more than 2 years ago and I actually only shared this article with my closed friends but now I also wanted to share with you guys because I don't know I just feel like without this part of the story my channel it just doesn't make sense for me it's just like it feels like I'm missing out something so I really want to share with you I quit law school at least for the time being how funny it is that just about 1.5 months ago this post was supposed to announce I'm finally going to
law school life is so unpredictable huh you read it right my friends I just declined my law school offer a few minutes ago if you have known me for a while you must be surprised by my decision as I'm literally giving up an offer that I worked my ass off for six years to get I first started thinking about going to law school in North America back in 2017 during my third year in college I was fortunate enough to be taught by a great *law professor which planted the seed of making law school my goal
after graduation back then I mainly wanted to go to law school because I wanted to specialize in a specific field second of all I wanted to continue my studies and believed I could excel in law and third my law professor strongly recommended it so yep I set it as my goal and began a series of preparations ranging from prepping for the LSAT to applying to law school by the way LSAT stands for a Law School Admission Test as naive as I was at that time I thought LSAT was just another standardized exam where I could
achieve a decent or even good score by spending a few months preparing little did I know that the LSAT is considered one of the hardest exams in the world I wouldn't elaborate too much on how tough the 2.5 years exam prep process was for me but I basically completed close to a thousand practice tests took the exam seven times and found myself in a mental state where I would burst into tears whenever I got bad results after a test so I actually already um finished half of my trail my hiking uh journey so I'm going
to start to go down right now let's go you might be curious what motivated me back then to persist in pursuing this path considering how demanding it was honestly it wasn't anything big or special for me it was more because I wanted to study in North America I like challenges and being an attorney sounded cool their social status is high and they have great potential for making good money plus I wanted to prove if others can do it why can't I during my on and off prep process I even got to pursue an LLM in
law and economics in Europe and worked as a business development specialist at an Arbitration Association for a year to be brutally honest as time passed I became less and less sure why I really wanted to go to law school I felt lost indeed maybe it's because I didn't want others to view me as someone without a goal or clueless about their life or perhaps I was just afraid to see myself this way but I never seriously reflected on whether this was a path I truly wanted to pursue I might have noticed this issue a few
times before but I immediately convinced myself Pearly no no no you want to be a lawyer in the future you're smart and you have worked so hard I successfully convinced myself multiple times that it would be a waste to give up on law school I should go to law school that's what I kept telling myself in the book The Tyranny of Merit the author pointed out that we are living in an era where we are constantly being screened selected and ranked at schools and workplaces consequently we feel a strong need to fight harder and harder
to achieve success and prove our value I couldn't relate more to this as I felt addicted to chasing one "prize" (for example good University good grade good grad school good job good salary and so on) after another since college I started to confuse what I really wanted to do with what society tells me I should do did I decide to do this because I wanted to receive validation from society or people around me so I could further validate my self worth or was it because this was something I truly wanted to do from the start
quote "law school is a great default option for graduates who don't know what to do" end of quote now it seems that this statement is describing me if it weren't for the extremely expensive and unreasonable amount of tuition I probably wouldn't have second guessed my decision to go to law school and started this whole reflection process life can be funny if it weren't for Covid which allowed me to defer a year after another I probably wouldn't or couldn't have thought through all of this as I didn't know myself well enough back then well still not
enough now but at least a bit more do I really want to work as a lawyer probably it's more because I want to prove to others that I am outstanding and capable of doing it one of the biggest fears these past few years was when someone asked me why do you want to be a lawyer because I didn't even know the answer myself you might be curious what am I going to do next well I'm still thinking about it while it might sound risky to give up my law school offer without a solid plan for
the next step the last thing I want is to make I don't know what else I could do the reason for going to law school am I going to regret the decision I just made in the future maybe yes maybe no what I'm telling myself is that as long as I have thought it through carefully I won't hypothesize too much about what might happen when considering whether to give up this offer I conducted many cost benefit analysis but this time I want to trust my instinct surprisingly instead of blaming myself I felt relieved when I
finally decided to give up the offer I want to give myself a big hug and a 大変お疲れ様でした for all the hard work I've done these past few years though I'm unsure whether these experiences will be of any use in the future I sure hope they will I feel relieved and happy with my decision during this journey scores rankings building a good resume and becoming someone outstanding like those people I see on LinkedIn were the things that occupied my mind all day long however I forgot how big how diverse and how full of opportunities this world
is I'm gradually learning to trust myself and believe that with my experiences skills and most importantly mindset and attitude I can achieve success in any field thank you for listening I almost cry myself even after like two years of writing this article so yeah thank you for listening to my story I really appreciate that thank you thank you so much yay I finished my trail and I can't wait to go get some sports drink I'm so thirsty
