I remember growing up in poverty. There’s basically no opportunity around. I was in a recovering post-soviet country that couldn't recover.
And I figured out a solution as a little kid. I said, ”You know what? I can’t do all the things that I want to do right now, but when things get better, that’s when I’ll start doing everything.
So I’m just going to wait for that time. ” And that’s literally how I spent the first 17 years of my life. Until I got accepted to United States Air Force Academy.
And I said, “Finally! Going to America, the land of freedom and opportunity, and as soon as I get there, I’ll start doing all the things that I want to do. ” And, of course, I got here and I realized I had less time now than I had ever had in my life.
And guess what? Of course I figured out another great solution. I said, “You know what, I’m going to wait.
I’m going to wait these four years. I’m gonna be a good little boy and do what I’m told. And once these four years are done, I’ll be free again, and I’ll start doing all the things that I want to do.
” And then luckily, I read The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida. Otherwise, I’d be working at a job right now, hoping that I would find another job where I would have more time to do all the things I wanted to do, and of course ultimately, I would end up dying before I did any of those things. So the first big idea is: stop hoping for a completion of anything in life.
If you’re not doing it right now, realize that you’re probably never going to do it. Now the second big idea is: don’t get lost in tasks and duties. And for me, this was one of the biggest things.
When I was at the Academy, I would wake up and I would say, “Okay, I have to clean my little room for an hour now, and then I have to go to the mail room and I have to drop this off, and then I have to take a bunch of papers and organize them from A to Z, and then when I get back to my room, I have to do a lot of homework. ” And I realized if I'm dying, is that what I'm going to be saying? Oh, I was a really good boy and I cleaned my room for an hour every day.
Is that what I'm going to say, or is it going to be something like I pursued my purpose? So again, make sure you're not getting lost in those tasks and duties. And those tasks and duties have a weird way of seeming like you couldn't do without them.
And there are certain things that you couldn't do without, but you can at least minimize those things and maximize the time you're dedicating towards actually pursuing your purpose. The third big idea is: be willing to change everything in your life. And honestly, I don't know if I can think of anything that's more masculine than this.
When I was a little boy, this was probably something that scared me the most. You know, here I am a little boy and what am I gonna do if my dad loses his job? You know, he somehow got lucky and landed that job and if he loses it, guess what?
We're done. I'm gonna be starving. So that was something that scared me all my life.
But that was when I was a little boy. Now as a man, I don't care. I don't care.
I've cultivated myself to a point where no matter what happens, no matter what kind of change I go through, it doesn't matter. I'm going to be able to figure it out. And this reminds me of a story about Andrew Carnegie.
So you're either going to be someone like Andrew Carnegie, or you're going to be a man that somehow got lucky finding a job and is holding onto it and not letting go and being scared of what's going to happen if he loses it. Or you can be someone like Andrew Carnegie. Basically, they asked Andrew Carnegie about his business, which was the most successful business in the world, and he said, "We don't care.
Go ahead. You can take away everything from us. You can take away the machines.
You can take the factories. We don't care. Give us four years and we'll be back to where we are.
" And that's exactly how I feel at this point in my life. I've cultivated the things that I need to be a man to a point where you can literally take away everything from me. I don't care.
You can drop me in the middle of a street somewhere in the world, and I'll be able to come back where I am. Now the fourth big idea is: live as if your father were dead. And I remember reading this for the first time, and I got so upset.
I said, "But I respect my daddy. But I respect him. " Okay, it doesn't have to do anything with respect.
It just means that when you're a little boy, people tell you, "Oh, this is good for you. This is what you need to do. This is what you need to do.
" When you become a man, and you cultivate the qualities of a man, there's no one in the world that knows what you need to do better than you do. Again, a superior man respects everyone, takes people's opinions and betters himself, but ultimately, I'm not going to go to my mom or my dad and say, "Hey guys, should I work on my business or is it time for me to go get my MBA? Which one guys?
" Okay, I mean I know guys that are literally, go up to their mom, and they're like, "Oh but, you know, with my girlfriend, should I have sex in this position or in that position? " Like what are you doing? As a man, you are the masculine energy, you know what's best for you.
And finally, if you don't know your purpose, discover it now. It kind of like, when you were a kid, you watched a warrior trying to conquer something, or trying to save someone, or trying to liberate. That's the purpose.
That's what you're attracted to. You didn't watch some guy waking up, going to work, coming back watching TV, going to sleep, and then doing the same thing over and over again. If you had all the money and all the time in the world, what would you do?
I remember asking myself this question a few years ago. Here I was at the Academy getting my 4. 0, setting myself up for my MBA, and all that.
And I asked myself this question and I thought, "I'm not doing anything right now that I would be doing if I had all the money and all the time in the world. " So as a man, you want to have a purpose in your life, And if you don't know what it is, discover it now. If you're having trouble discovering it, ask yourself this question, "If you had all the money and all the time in the world, what would you do?
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