Kamla Harris has created her own scented candle and just like her, it gets lit every night. She's a drunk. Walt made himself fair game since his only attack was that the other guy was weird.
Because everyone is weird the more you get to know them. It's why marriage is a commitment. Over time, both spouses realize we're all bat crazy.
But there's weird and there's dangerously insane. And that's thinking children can decide to have themselves castrated. And that's Greg Gutfeld stepped onto that stage and unleashed a full-blown comedic takedown of Kamla Harris and Tim Walls.
And nobody in that audience saw it coming. With biting sarcasm and jokes, time to perfection, he tore into what he called the biggest cracks in their political armor. From Kamla's famously twisty answers to Walls's soft, hands-off leadership, nothing was off limits.
If political spin wore a face, Gutfeld painted a target on it, and he did not miss. CBS's 60 Minutes was caught editing their interview with Kla Harris to make her look better. It's a shocking ethical lapse.
Mike Wallace must be rolling in his grave. not over this though, but that his son is Chris Wallace. I think it's very important as you have heard from so many incredible leaders for us at every moment in time and certainly this one to see the moment in time in which we exist and are present and to be able to contextualize it to understand where we exist in the history and in the moment as it relates not only to the past but the future.
You know that's some bad weed. Generally, when people get high, they actually have some interesting thoughts. Not her.
Gutfeld didn't just walk in that night. He came in like a comedian, loaded up and running purely on sarcasm, wearing a grin that practically screamed, "This is about to hurt. " He locked his sights on Kla Harris and Tim Walls together.
This wasn't a simple roast. It was a full-scale double takedown. By the time it was over, the political stage looked like it had been flattened by a comedy wrecking ball.
Remained a constant in what impacted the polls and it's driven by identity politics. What we're going to cook today, okay, is an Indian recipe. Yes, because you are and you all helped us win in 2020 and we're going to do it again in 2024.
What would Trump have to say about Kla's qualification? Well, you know, she's flip-flopping, Greg. I mean, these are flip flops and Indian people and blacks wear flip flops, which is good.
If you're loving this breakdown so far, smash that like button and subscribe because there's a lot more where this came from. He kicked things off with Kla Harris, the vice president with a stacked government resume and a speaking style gutfeld compared to a GPS that keeps glitching out. He honed in on the strange rhythm of her public remarks.
carefully built phrases that twist and loop like a freestyle rap that lost its way halfway through. Every time she opens her mouth, he joked, "You genuinely can't tell if she's making a policy point or performing spoken word at an open mic. " It one of them at Politico says is like Walt's wide eyes showed his passion and emotional intensity.
Can we show that? There is a white eye that humans would widen their eyes to convey that danger is close. What emotion are you getting from that?
Sorry. He compared her delivery to someone who just discovered what a metaphor is and now crams one into every sentence whether it fits or not. And when it comes to substance, Gutfeld says she skims right past the issues like they've got a do not disturb sign hanging on them.
In Phoenix, he cracked that asking Kamala to explain inflation was like asking a cat to file your taxes. Lots of noise, zero results. She tiptoes around the big topics, he said.
Like the truth might shatter the moment she touches it, filling the silence with nervous laughter and a word salad that leaves everyone more lost than when she started. With Walt, it's hard to even bring him up. He has a resting snitch face, you know?
Uh I mean he he forfeited his man car during co in the riots and and you're right and also you know at that diner of course he left early. So don't you find it weird that for a terrifying threat to democracy that Trump is not a single interviewer in the history in his history has approached him with trepidation hoping for a straight answer. Don't hold your breath.
Gutfeld said her speeches sometimes sound like a TED talk from someone who skipped every single rehearsal. He blasted her legendary habit of dodging hard questions, saying watching her in interviews felt like someone playing dodgeball with the facts. Every time reality closed in, she'd retreat to lines like, "Let's be clear.
" without ever actually clearing up a thing. He compared it to a cooking show where the chef explains lasagna using nothing but cloud metaphors and a nervous giggle. Endless talking, zero insight, just confusion.
served on a plate. Then came the border, a topic she's officially tied to, but almost never actually addresses. Gutfeld's take, it's like a gym membership, technically active, practically never used.
He jokes she treats the border like a problem that'll fix itself if she ignores it long enough, and that she's more likely to show up on Mars than anywhere near it. When immigration finally comes up, he said she handles it with the urgency of a weather report on a slow Tuesday. I want to see this in slow motion.
And you'll see uh Waltz extends his hand to his wife. She grabs it. They shake.
He pulls her close and then goes in for that nonfriction hug. All the while still shaking her hand. I wish there was a word to describe that.
Oh yeah, weird. Just when the crowd thought the jokes couldn't cut any deeper, Gutfeld turned his attention to Tim Walls. If Kamala brings the confusion, he joked, "Wall brings the hesitation.
" Gutfeld painted him as the kind of leader who strolls into a crisis holding a clipboard and walks out with nothing but a shrug. Under his leadership, Gutfeld said Minnesota stopped feeling like a success story and started feeling like an endless maze of red tape. Gutfeld went straight after Wald's pandemic era choices.
The ones that buried everyone in Zoom calls, shifting mask rules and messaging that flipped week to week. He described Walts as a captain drifting through his own rule book like a DJ spinning songs nobody asked for. Jim shut down one day reopened the next, but only under bizarre new conditions.
Health policy under walls, he joked, looked like it was written by a panicked committee running on pure chaos. As a teacher, my number one responsibility in the classroom is the safety, security, and belongingness of every single child in that room. These are children my son's age, a fourth grader, a 10-year-old who just wants to go to the bathroom and their identity is they are male or female and they just go in that bathroom and use it.
" End quote. Sounds so folksy, you know, belongingness. Yeah, they'll be belonging in therapy with this guy at the helm.
And when it came to the crime surge, Gutfeld didn't hold back. He said Walls treated rising violence like a rumor he hoped would quietly go away. Minnesota's major cities spiraled into unrest while Walds responded with meetings, statements, and what Gutfeld called a calm face full of mild concern.
He described Walds as someone who read the leadership playbook backward, starting with the blame, skipping the action completely. Watching Walls face reporters, Gutfeld joked, felt like a substitute teacher trying to explain quantum physics to a room full of kindergarteners. Awkward, lost, and totally out of his depth.
He also mocked Walls's flat public presence, calling it dull as a soggy mop and saying his vision was about as sharp as a bat's eyesight at noon. Walds didn't lead. He stalled.
He didn't decide. He delayed. And when things blew up, he acted like someone else had lit the fuse.
Question of what can be unbburdened by what has been. We see what can be unbburdened by what has been. to see what can be.
Unbburdened by what has been. Believing in what can be. Unbburdened by what has been.
What can be unbburdened by what has been. What can be unburdened by what has been. What can be unbburdened by what has been.
Having faith in what can be. Unburdened by what has been. See what can be.
unburdened by what has been to see what can be unburdened by what has been. You know, if Kamla gets dementia, it would be an improvement. But Gutfeld was far from done.
He circled back to Kamla with the precision of a seasoned roast master. He brought up her time as California's attorney general, arguing her reforms often looked more built for headlines than for real justice. He also went after her constantly shifting positions, joking she's a political chameleon on a permanent Wi-Fi connection, always updating this administration and and the the spouse swapping of the VP and the president.
We saw it before. Like Dr Jill didn't kiss Joe like that. Yeah.
You know what I'm saying? And now he's he couldn't wait to get that full embrace. It wasn't a bro hug.
It was a yo hug. And uh he put his wife in the friend zone. Yes.
which is always That must have been a fun car ride home. Why can't you hug me like her husband? I mean, it's just It's weird.
It is weird. You know, Joey, I think that it's okay to take uh uh Waltz's piccadillos, if you call it, apart. Because remember, he broke the seal by calling Vance weird.
And we're all weird, including him. Yeah, we're very weird. I'm weird.
Then came the legendary nervous laugh. Gutfeld pointed out her habit of bursting into laughter at exactly the wrong moments, like she's buffering in real time. He joked, "Kamla's nervous giggle could power a small wind farm, and it shows up right on Q the second she realizes she doesn't have an answer.
Asking her a simple question, he said, is like setting off a Rube Goldberg machine. Loud, complicated, and going absolutely nowhere. " Then he swung back to Falls because apparently there was still plenty left to say.
He mocked Walt's heavy reliance on task forces and committees where every problem from violent crime to potholes turns into another study, another panel, another delay. He compared it to piling up dirty laundry and hoping someone else deals with it. He also torched the education results under walls, pointing to falling test scores while funding poured into programs that sounded like rejected TED talk pitches, leaving kids fluent in buzzwords, but not much else.
Kla Harris is the Democrat candidate for president of the United States. I'll give you a second to come to the borders are who couldn't find our southern border on a map of Texas now wants to be America's commanderin-chief. Kamla couldn't lead a campfire sing along, let alone the country's armed forces.
But does that matter? Not to the media. Now, they would like this framed as a team sport battle.
Left versus right, Democrat versus Republican. But in reality, it's the media narrative machine versus real. Then Gutfeld lined up their flaws like a matched set of dysfunction.
Kamala's confusion, he said, pairs perfectly with Wals's indecision. Two sides of the same shaky coin. One delivers speeches that come out completely scrambled.
The other runs things like he lost momentum halfway and never got it back. Together, he joked, they're like a buffering Wi-Fi signal, always trying to connect, never quite getting there. He closed out their combined act with a brutal final line.
Kamala shows up with halfbaked inspiration while Waltz manages everything like leadership can just be microwaved. Put them in a room together to solve a problem. He joked and Kamala would whip up a word salad so tangled even AI couldn't decode it while Walls quietly calls for a task force and slips out the back door before anything gets solved.
who made her first major speech last night since Trump took office. And it was another classic ball of verbal vomit. Here she is referencing a viral video of elephants.
Watch who saw that video from a couple of weeks ago. The one of the elephants at the San Diego Zoo during the earthquake. Gutfeld also went after Kamla's carefully built public image.
Assembled, he said, like a wobbly Jenga tower made of friendly interviews, glowing headlines, and rehearsed empathy. He contrasted it with Walls's flat, forgettable presence, joking it felt like a 404 error trying to run an entire state. In his view, neither one truly leads, but both have become experts at dodging accountability.
What had the crowd roaring? His comparison of Kamla's vice presidency to a group project where she barely shows up, but still wants full credit. Meanwhile, Walls runs Minnesota like he's still waiting for the tutorial screen to finish loading.
Speaker of former VP nominee Tim Waltz. He joined Bado or at a Texas town hall last night and the estrogen levels were enough to give Chuck Norris menstrual cramps. I wonder is our strength our diversity?
Our strength is our diversity. We've been talking about this for years as a country of immigrants and we let them define the issue on immigration. We let them define the issue on DNI DEI and we let them define what will.
Then came the knockout line and it landed hard. Gutfeld argued that Kla Harris and Tim Walls are living proof of what happens when style completely beats out substance. In his words, they're like a beautifully wrapped gift box with absolutely nothing inside.
He called Kamla's laugh a national mystery. He said, "Wall's vision for the future is basically an urban legend. And if he ever rolled out a bold plan, you'd need a translator, a dictionary, and a whole lot of free time just to figure out what he meant.
" He painted the final picture. Kamala at a podium saying things that sound important until you replay them and realize there's nothing there. And Walls standing right next to her, clutching a binder stuffed with buzzwords, not even sure which page he's on.
Together, Gutfeld concluded, "They're a duet with no melody. " both singing, neither one saying a thing. And Gutfeld made one thing crystal clear.
He wasn't done. Because as long as Kamla keeps speaking in riddles and Waltz keeps governing off an instruction manual written in invisible ink, there will always be another headline to mock, another policy to laugh at, and another moment begging to be roasted. Head.
