hello everyone and welcome to Candle of wisdom today I want to share with you some heartfelt thoughts from a retired professor at Harvard University intended for anyone who is in their senior years these words have moved many older folks to tears and I believe that after hearing them you will feel touched and reflect on many things with a wide range of emotions by the time we reach our 60s if we still make certain mistakes life in old age may become quite miserable let me offer some pieces of advice that I believe can help you live
wisely with understanding and with dignity anyone hoping for a healthy long life should take a moment to listen if possible please subscribe to my channel so that if you ever forget these points one day you can come back and listen to them again first never let your children know the exact amount of your SA ings this is no small matter studies suggest that nearly 70% of family conflicts involve dividing assets not long ago a heartbreaking incident occurred in which siblings turned against each other over Inherited property there is an old saying money is money kin
is kin the more children a family has the greater the possibility of money related disputes sometimes even even leading to lawsuits and broken relationships the money we have worked hard our whole lives to earn should not become a source of stress and Conflict for our children right second do not quarrel with your spouse once you pass 60 your children are busy with their own families and jobs so your life partner remains your most important companion there is a proverb When We're Young we share love when we're old we share loyalty the older we grow the
more our spouse becomes the dearest person who shares our life and supports us emotionally no one wants to live alone in old age so treasure your partner treat each other as the precious gift you truly are and care for each other wholeheartedly third do not spend your own money to raise your grandchildren it might seem harsh but research shows that more than 60% of older people feel physically and mentally exhausted when looking after grandchildren not only is it tiring it can lead to being taken for granted the younger Generations think differently from us sometimes we
pour in our efforts and money yet the children do not necessarily feel grateful it can even spark friction within the family it might be better to devote that time and energy to yourself and enjoy your golden years fourth if you happen to be living alone do not rush into remarriage this may sound difficult but for the sake of your happiness in later life it needs to be said plainly a new marriage at this stage is unlikely to be stable you both have built separate lives and combining them can cause clashes in lifestyle and finances rather
than stepping into that potential conflict why not enjoy the freedom do the things you love and live without additional constraints fifth hold on to your house never hastily sell it just because your children speak sweetly or promise things a house is more than just four walls it holds countless memories and is the safest place to return to no matter how harsh the world outside may be your own home home is a source of refuge and comfort don't give it up so easily six no matter how close you are to your children remember the so-called Crow
pushing principle which underlines the importance of Independence and self- protection like how adult birds eventually learn to fly on their own we too cannot rely on our children for everything we need to be independent in our senior year by not becoming a burden on them we are also showing them a form of love seventh do not stay at your child's home for more than 3 days although it may feel cold to say so respecting boundaries preserves affection for the Long Haul overstaying even if they never say so can make your children and their spouses uncomfortable
it is better to keep some distance as with a cup of tea enjoy M comes from just the right warmth if it's too hot it's difficult to drink eighth when your children marry avoid demanding too much the more we expect the more we risk disappointment most parents hope that children will take care of them in old age but Modern Life is hectic and your children have their own responsibilities it is healthier to let go and give them Freedom it's like flying a kite you need to loosen the thread a bit for the kite to soar
High ninth do not let unresolved worries keep you awake at night sometimes the more we think the more Tangled our minds become let it go until tomorrow by then it may be clearer preserve a relaxed mind remember that worrying excessively about what cannot be changed only erodes your emotion well-being which is just as important as your physical health 10th do not fret over what's unnecessary there is a saying children have their own fortunes once children become adults they have their own lives and choices and we cannot live their lives for them check in regularly with
warmth but do not intrude too deeply worry less and Longevity comes more naturally 11th do not work yourself to exhaustion if you feel tired do not push through the body is not a machine it needs rest if you are unwell do not just take medicine in silence and keep going once your health deteriorates you will find the hospital the most expensive place of all know your limits staying healthy should be your main priority 12th don't be so Thrifty that you miss out on life's Joys most people over 60 have known hardship and saved their whole
lives but life is fleeting and when the time arrives it's time to spend if you want to enjoy a good meal do it if you want to travel go for it don't put it off it's like the candies you've stored away all your life now is the time to unwrap and Savor them 13th health is your greatest asset health is the foundation of everything only when we are healthy can we enjoy life and avoid being a burden to our children take care of yourself as if nurturing the roots of a tree strong roots support a
lush canopy live happily stay healthy and give meaning to your golden years ultimately three important things are proper nutrition sufficient rest and a cheerful Spirit sleep is especially important so avoid staying up late and create a comfortable environment for rest remember that a person's health is not just for themselves it's also the happiness of the entire family no matter how wealthy or accomplished you once were without Health it's all meaningless maintain a healthy lifestyle do moderate exercise get regular checkups and keep a positive mindset this is the best gift you can give your loved ones
we must understand that we are no longer young and there are actions we can no longer afford to do poorly we must avoid naive mistakes and major oversights even if we still feel mentally alert certain things must be approached with caution it's best not to interfere in three types of matters at this age first don't step in when it comes to your children's purchase of a house or car if if they ask for your advice that's fine share your opinion but never make decisions for them second don't involve yourself in disputes and politics among your
extended relatives often these revolve around interests and money and there is no guarantee you know the entire situation you might invite unnecessary trouble upon yourself third don't get tangled in your friend's marital or romantic issues relationships are inherently complicated even if they ask for your help most couples will ultimately sort out their matters on their own you should be a listening ear not a decision maker on their behalf there are also three types of money you should not lend once you are older first don't lend money unless it's for urgent situations like serious illness or
a natural disaster otherwise you are risking your hard-earned savings which are finite at this stage of Life giving a loan is easy but retrieving it is hard and it may permanently fracture a relationship you worked a lifetime for that money it's meant to help you stay comfortable and self-sufficient second do not lend money for financial investments that promise High returns when you no longer have a steady income losing any amount of savings can be devast stating if they lose you lose if they win your share might not be much anyway it's simply not worth the
risk Third never lend money for gambling you will almost certainly not get it back the best solution is to refuse straight away money is directly linked to your comfort in old age so think carefully before lending not everyone will be truly grateful or have the means to repay not everyone will value your friendship as you do it's wise to Shield yourself from potential harm equally important avoid three foolish actions one don't neglect your health you may not realize it fully until you lose it so do not harm your body through overeating smoking or excessive drinking
two don't make errors in your relationships that cause others to resent you you don't have the energy to handle those repercussions anymore live peacefully avoid interfering too much in younger Generations Affairs and remember what it was like when you were their age and wanted your own Freedom three don't offer help indirectly by relying on a middleman using your network to help others in complicated ways can place your reputation and resources at risk and if things go wrong the blame will fall on you as you move into old age you'll want to safeguard your well-being your
relationships and your peace of mind avoid carrying the weight of unnecessary resentments or burdens in this life stage there are three things you should not wish for do not wish for immense wealth only for the comfort of enough food and warm clothing without worrying about shortfalls do not wish for others to rescue you in every difficulty only for the ability to rely on yourself do not wish for gratitude or repayment from everyone you've helped only for a clear conscience additionally there are three things you should not say do not lie do not use harsh words
to threaten others and do not speak words that deeply wound people's hearts our words can harm someone greatly and we do not need such troubles or conflicts furthermore there are three things you shouldn't do don't hold on to anger and become a bag of grudges because anger only damages your own health don't try to appear unnaturally young or chase things beyond your reach just be true to your age and remain healthy and don't be an unending piggy bank don't keep saving to the point of depriving yourself of basic Comforts money is meant to serve life
you use it wisely and enjoy the fruits of your labor finally never give up on three important things don't give up on wanting to look good present yourself neatly and cleanly so you can feel confident don't give up on kindness stay compassionate and benevolent don't give up on Joy keep your mind young and Your Heart Light there are also three things not to fear do not fear growing old because it is Nature's Way do not fear being alone because Solitude can bring peace and do not fear the future because whatever will come will come what
matters is living your best in the present age is not measured by numbers but by how young your spirit remains some people in their 80s or 90s still brim with youthful energy and happiness let go of your worries and live the remaining days in the most fulfilling way possible there are also three questions not worth asking do not ask about someone's old titles or positions they are no longer significant do not ask about people's finances money does not determine a person's true worth and do not ask about someone's age what truly matters is whether they
are happy in the end old age is not something to fear the real fear is not knowing how to enjoy it live in good health and joy and free yourself from needless entanglements thank you so much for listening if you found this sharing helpful please consider subscribing or sharing it so that more people can benefit from these thoughts I look forward to seeing all of you in future programs
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