let's start with the first question about what do I mean by being aware of being aware so if I were to ask you the question are you aware of your thoughts right now what would you say right now I'm not having any thought I'm just listening to you but first yes but not only okay so let me ask you another question are you aware of the sound of my voice of course I have to keep talking for you to be aware of the sign you're okay perfect are you aware of of these flowers yes I
can see them yeah are you aware of the sensation at the soles of your feet yes okay are you aware of the trees behind you no don't I don't have to turn around and now you're aware of them when you turn around yes so each time I ask you this question first are you aware of my voice you direct your attention to my voice and as a result of being aware of my voice you say yes then I ask you about your the flowers you move your attention from my voice to the flowers I then
ask you I were where of the sensation of the soles of your feet you take your direction your attention off the flowers and you as it were shine your attention on the tingling of the soles of your feet then when I ask you are you aware of the trees behind you you have to turn round and you shine your attention in that direction yes mm-hmm am I being your experience okay so now if I were to ask you the question not are you aware of a B or C but simply are you aware what would
you say yeah I'm here no not are you here are you aware yes I'm aware okay now what do you do with your attention to come up with that answer all the previous questions every time I asked you are you aware of this object you had to shine your attention on that object and it was only because you shown your attention on that object that you said yes when I first asked you if you are aware of the trees you said no but then you turned around and you shown your attention on the trees and
as a result of that experience you said yes now I asked you the question are you aware you paused and you said yes what did you do with your attention in that pose I went in where did you go something so much similar interesting because when you ask me are you aware of the sensation of your sole of your feet it was a coin in okay since when I okay you go as it were inside the body you go to an experience that seems to be inside as opposed to the trees which seem to be
outside but when you go inside the body go now inside the body close your eyes and explore with your attention the experience of the inside of the body all that's there is sensation yeah it's just sensation there's nothing else there apart from sensation yes right now if you explore your mind all that you find there are thoughts and images yes yeah so when you so where do you go to find the experience of being aware you don't go into the body you don't go into the mind you've already agreed all there is to the body
is sensation all there is to the mind is thought and perception yet the experience of being aware is an experience you don't believe now that you are aware it is your experience yes now yes where do you go to find that experience what do you do with your attention yes in other words it's the opposite of a focusing of the attention it's actually a D focusing of the attention because the experience of being aware is not an object that you can direct your attention towards yeah right but nevertheless so it is a non objective experience
you cannot deny the experience of being way it is an experience but it has no objective qualities yes right now if I were to ask you what is it that experiences being aware I guess I would have to say itself that's what I mean by the experience of being aware of being aware exactly right what else could experience awareness other than awareness because only awareness is aware the body is not aware only awareness is aware so what is it that could have the experience of being aware awareness only itself now awareness doesn't have to move
away from itself in order to know the experience of being aware it needs to move away from itself to shine on the tree or the flower or the sensation or the thought it has to rise as attention attention means to stretch towards attend and stretches itself towards the apparent object but to know itself it doesn't have to rise it doesn't have to go anywhere attention doesn't need to rise attention only needs to rise to know an object to know its self-awareness need only be itself so the the way to know awareness is simply to be
knowingly awareness and the reason to go into your second question the reason that you feel there is a a wall a blank wall that is covering awareness it is because you are trying to direct your attention towards it the closest you can get attention can get to attending to awareness is to attend to a blank state a blank state is an object so there is a blank state that MIT which is a state of the finite mind and it mimics the true emptiness of awareness now we can direct our attention towards a blank State and
this is often misunderstood as meditation meditation is not the direction of the attention towards a blank state it is the sinking of attention into the emptiness of its source the reason you feel there is this barrier is because you are trying to find awareness with attention attention awareness can never become the object of it sorry awareness can never become the object of attention it is it's the subject or its source so it is a relaxation of the attention not a directing of the attention so if we ask how can I get there how do I
do it there is no how-to if I were to ask you to stand up I'm not asking you to do this but if I were to ask you at a stand up to stand up and and say how could you take a step towards yourself try to take a step towards yourself how would you do that how would you take a step towards yourself if I said take a step towards these flowers you would know what to do you could do that you could practice that you could walk or if I said take a step
towards the trees you could practice it you could turn around and start walking the only thing you cannot walk towards is yourself you can only walk towards something that is not yourself so you in this metaphor is awareness the only thing that awareness can attend to is not itself and in order to know something that is not itself it has to rise in the form of attention or mind then it directs itself towards the object but it cannot attend to itself in the same way that you cannot walk towards yourself because you are already standing
in yourself as yourself awareness is already standing in itself as itself there is no how-to because it's already there there's only a how to go somewhere else so any practice is a is a movement away this is why I call it a non practice it is the cessation of the practice of rising as attention and directing awareness towards the object it is a non practice however if our attention is so accustomed to directing itself towards objects most of the time then this directing of the attention will seemed to us to be the natural state so
as a compassionate concession to one who is accustomed to attending most of the time to objects the teaching says okay as a practice direct your attention towards yourself the teaching knows better the teaching knows that it's you can't do that but as a concession to them it's it's like a horse that is galloping away from its stable if you want the horse to go back to the stable you don't just pull on the reins and turn it round you very slowly turn it around the horse thinks it's always galloping in the same direction you turn
it round without the horse realizing that it's being turned round it's just from its point of view it's just galloping forwards it doesn't realize after a while that it's galloping home so it's it's a little bit the same the teaching as a concession to the mind that is obituaries on objects the teaching says practice self-inquiry investigate your true nature turn to return your attention to its source the visa skillful means but actually when we when when awareness is divested of its limitations awareness realizes not only does it recognize itself I'm caricaturing awareness now but it
it says oh I've always been myself I never truly left myself and became a finite mind I was never truly limited I never really left home this is why in India they say though they took by the illusion of ignorance rather than ignorance there is no awareness never never has to become a separate self in order to know itself it never in fact ceases to be and know itself alone so the reason I say that is if you feel that you have to practice this relaxation of the attention in its source and and for instance
as I said such as I said sometimes over the last few days if you have to lovingly remind the attention that what it is looking for is doesn't reside at its destiny it resides at its source that these are concessions compassionate concessions with their ways of inviting lovingly inviting the attention back to its source when it gets back to its source we realize our attention actually never leaves awareness but until that is clear it is legitimate to talk about self inquiry or self investigation or self abidance it seems to be a practice from the point
of view of a finite mind and if it seems to be a practice then we should practice it but very lovingly it's not a disciplined practice it's it's a loving think of it more as a as a loving cooperation you're working lovingly with your attention inviting it gently to come back to its home in the heart does that have I answered your questions yes thank you if some part of your question remains over
