i'd like to talk to you about your fears the fears that stop you doing the things that you want to be doing i know you are afraid a lot more often than you like to acknowledge or that you like to talk about or think about and those fears really paralyze you they stop you living your life they stop you enjoying your life they stop you getting on with things they stop you achieving anything they stop you being who you are so why are you allowing fear to be like that for you well as you know
we're all built as every animal is in such a way that we respond with an impulse of adrenaline as soon as we feel under threat now sometimes that adrenaline helps us build to anger and protect ourselves and fight for what we believe in or fight for what is important to us or fight for our safety or fight for our survival but a lot of the time instead of it leading to that response that fighting response it leads to a flight response it leads us to feel that the threat is greater than what we can cope
with the threat is so enormous that our energy our power will not be sufficient to meet it at those times maybe wisely sometimes we give in we fold we give up we give over we move away we flee because there is another reaction we can have which is that of freezing freezing paralyzing no longer being able to move at all as long as we flee we're using the energy if we freeze we're blocking the energy but anyway whether we flee or freeze those are both fear reactions and as always our emotions are a message and
they tell us something about what matters to us so every time we are afraid of something by the same token it also tells us what the opposite of that would be in other words what it is that we would value and we are afraid of losing so if you are afraid of an exam for instance what it tells you is that passing an exam is very important to you you would never be afraid of it if it didn't matter to you if you are afraid of a job interview same thing the job is important to
you and it matters to you that you succeed at it but the fear of course will do the opposite it will tend to make you run away from it and it will tend to paralyze you so the trick is to stick with the message and not get too engrossed in the feeling itself this is why people speak of facing your fear facing the fear is not quite what i would suggest i would suggest that you would allow the fear that you would actually feel the fear that you would actually value the fear if you can
value it and you can welcome it and you can treat it as a message telling you how important something is to you then you might be able to determine a different attitude towards it so when you allow yourself to know how important the job interview or the exam is to you or how important it is to you that you do well at something that you are afraid of failing at then you have a further step to take then you can move forward you can actually try to understand better why it is so important and remind
yourself of why it is so important you can become in other words purposeful about it again and as you remind yourself your purpose i mean why do you want to get this job why do you want to succeed at this exam is it just because other people would think less of you if you didn't or is it actually because getting this job means that you can do an important thing in your life that you can start acting in the world at a different level or that you can do something for other people what is the
value in that job what is the value in passing that exam and getting that qualification what is it really you are truly after because the moment you remind yourself of what it is you're after this little obstacle in the way won't seem anywhere near as big or as unovercomeable anymore what will happen is that you will rise above it because you see things from a different perspective and that is very much what you do in relation to fear you shift your perspective from being stuck in front of an obstacle to rising above and looking at
the overall importance of what it is you're trying to achieve what it is you're hoping for what it is you're aiming for what it is that you're going towards and as you remind yourself of what it is you're going towards you fly right over the obstacle you get back to that purpose you get back in the flow of things you get back into the effort of going towards what it is you temporarily are afraid you may not achieve failure is not an option you may not succeed the first time round you may not succeed the
second time round you may find it difficult none of that matters what matters is that you ask yourself whether or not this objective is really important is really worthwhile and if it is then it is worth going for it and as you go for it in that movement of going forward you re find the energy turn it into action use it instead of letting it turn into fear the energy will fuel you instead of stopping you or frightening you all these fears are helpful their messages they help you determine what matters in your life they
help you realize how sensitive you are they help you notice how good you are at knowing what is important to you what matters to you and how you need to go about it but it is never a good idea to go about it by letting yourself being frightened and put off it is never a good thing to go into hiding you may however need to pace yourself you may need to slow down you may need to retrieve some peace in your mind you may need to find some safety in your world again because without that
safety and without that peace and without the confidence that you can pace yourself and that you can do the moving forward at the right tempo and in the right way to suit yourself to stay at one with yourself without that ability to allow yourself the wealth of time and the wealth of being at one with yourself without that the fear may take over and you may rush it so much that you will forget why you are afraid that you will forget what it is that matters what it is that is important and well worth working
towards so it is the objective the thing that you're working towards not in its tiny little temporary manifestation but in its overall goal in its overall objective for your life the purpose and meaning of what is good for you to be doing and be preoccupied by if you remind yourself of those and you go back into this bigger loop to fly over the fears take them into account then you will be able to move across them transcend them go beyond them and as you learn to do this you will learn to distinguish between the moments
where fears tell you something is really truly dangerous and you need to abstain this is not a good way to go and the moments where a fear is just a momentary self-doubt a sense of freezing in your own confidence that you are able to just take step by step and go on the road of life that you have chosen now if you keep going on the road of life step by step towards what is important to you for the right reasons your fears will move into the background they'll still be there but they won't stop
you so much and when they do stop you it's time to really notice what is going on because of course the fear remains an important message we don't try to stop it we don't try to silence it we learn to live with it we learn to notice it we learn to welcome it and we learn to go beyond it find your courage my friend that's what's called courage find your courage and live well
