AITAH For Breaking My Number 1 Rule With A Handicapped Guy? Best Reddit Stories

I broke my number one intimacy rule with a man who uses a wheelchair and my best friend mistakenly thought I had a thing for handicapped people obviously throw away I don't need anyone here seeing my regular account also I'm in the US and English is my first language any discrepancies are because I suck at typing on my phone so for the give me the Bare Bones I don't have all day to hear this crew my top rule since high school has been no s before the third date I recently broke that rule with a guy

who uses a wheelchair and now my childhood best friend is upset and disgusted thinking I have some sort of fetish I'm a 28-year-old woman who has always had a clear stance on relationships and intimacy my childhood best friend Jess who is also 28 has known me since we were kids over the years we've shared countless secrets and supported each other through thick and thin to put it simply I don't think I'm any kind of prude but I've always been uncomfortable with casual intimacy it's just not my thing and it never has been Jess is well

aware of my views on this topic she seen me navigate through High School crushes College flings and the awkward stages of young adulthood despite understanding my stance Jess has often teased me about it in a light-hearted way her Jabs were never meant to hurt they were just part of our Dynamic a way to poke fun at how different we are in some respects while I've spent most of my 20s focusing on my degree and starting my career Jess has been in a stable long-term relationship for the past three years her boyfriend whom she met shortly

after moving to another state seems like a great guy they've built a life together and although I'm genuinely happy for her it's also a stark reminder of how different our lives have become living in different states has made it challenging for Jess and me to maintain the closeness we once had we used to spend nearly every weekend together but now our interactions are mostly limited to occasional phone calls and social media updates despite the physical distance I've always felt that our bond was unbreakable recently however I've started to feel the strain of our separate lives

more acutely while Jess has been busy with her relationship and new EXP experiences in a different state I've been navigating the often lonely path of being single my focus has been on building my career and achieving my personal goals which has been fulfilling but also isolating at times about a month ago I went on a first date with a guy I'd been talking to online for a while we had exchanged messages shared a few laughs and I genuinely thought things might be heading in a positive direction we finally decided to meet up in person and

I was cautiously optimistic however once we were face to face things felt off there was an unexplainable weird vibe that I just couldn't shake his conversation felt forced his jokes fell flat and there was an underlying discomfort that made me feel uneasy after about an hour of strain small talk and awkward silences I decided to cut the date short I made a polite excuse and left feeling a bit disappointed but also relieved to be out of that situation on my way home I decided I needed to unwind and shake off the awkwardness of the evening

I remembered a local pub that I used to frequent a cozy spot where I could just relax and and people watch it was a Friday night so I expected it to be busy but I figured it would be worth a shot when I arrived the place was indeed packed the bar area was crowded with groups of friends and couples enjoying their night out and there wasn't a single seat available determined not to let the night end on a sour note I grabbed a drink and started looking for a place to sit most of the restaurant

side of the pub was taken up by a lively birthday party with balloons laughter and the occasional offkey singing amidst the bustling crowd I noticed a small table off to the side there was only one seat open and a guy was sitting there engrossed in a book he seemed completely absorbed in his reading oblivious to the noisy celebration around him I hesitated for a moment considering my options I'm a social person by nature and the idea of sitting alone didn't appeal to me taking a deep breath I decided to go for it what's the worst

that could happen he might say no and I'd have to keep looking no big deal I approached the table with a friendly smile and asked if I could sit there for a bit prom ing that he wouldn't even have to talk to me if he didn't want to to my surprise he looked up from his book with an enthusiastic smile and said sure as I settled into the seat I got a better look at him up close he was strikingly handsome the kind of guy who seemed effortlessly attractive I felt a flutter of nerves but

quickly pushed it aside I sipped my drink in silence feeling a bit self-conscious but also intrigued by my unexpected company after a few minutes he glanced up from his book and said I don't mind talking if if you want to his voice was warm and inviting and I couldn't help but feel a bit relieved we started chatting and it turned out his name was Mike he was 29 had just finished his master's degree in computer learning and was living on his own for the first time he explained that he often came to the pub after

work because he lived nearby and wasn't used to the quiet of his new place after growing up with a large family half dozen siblings we talked for a good two hours diving deep into various topics and finding common ground on almost everything from our views on dating to our favorite hobbies and tastes it felt like we had a near total eclipse of a ven diagram on this stuff our conversation was effortless and engaging a rare connection that seemed to spark from the very beginning Mike shared that he had basically given up on dating which I

found surprising given how well we were getting along I couldn't help but blurt out I don't know why you'd give up on dating this is the closest thing I've had to a good date in forever it was my way of shooting my shot albeit indirectly but it felt right in the moment he gave me a kind of odd look one that I couldn't quite decipher then he said tell you what I have to go to the bathroom but when I come back I'll ask you out for real it struck me as a bit weird but

I nodded curious about what would happen next as he moved to leave it all clicked instead of standing up to walk away he rolled back in his wheelchair it hit me then that he wanted to give me a chance to back out without making things awkward the realization made my heart swell how considerate and thoughtful could this guy be when he returned and saw that I was still there his face broke into a wide delighted grin it was the kind of smile that could light up a room and I felt a rush of warmth I

was so eager to reassure him that I practically tripped over my words saying something along the lines of so I'm free all weekend what did you have in mind his grin grew even wider and we began planning our next date right then and there another hour later we found ourselves making plans for Saturday our conversation had flowed so smoothly and the connection between us was undeniable at some point Mike opened up about his condition explaining that he has a neuromuscular disorder he mentioned the name of the disorder but it was a bit too technical for

me to remember accurately my degree isn't in stem after all essentially his legs work but the signals from his brain get misinterpreted causing a lack of balance and coordination that prevents him from walking or standing as we continued talking the atmosphere in the pub began to shift the younger rowdier crowd started to take over and the noise level increased significantly it was getting harder to hear each other over the music and chatter and the intimate Vibe of our conversation was being drowned out noticing this Mike leaned in and asked would you like to go back

to my place for coffee and continue our conversation there his tone was casual but there was an underlying sincerity that made me feel completely at ease the idea of spending more time with him was incredibly appealing especially away from the growing chaos of the pub I agreed and we made our way to his place as you've likely guessed by now our coffee and conversation didn't happen until the next morning and I have absolutely no regrets about it we've been been dating ever since and although it's still early days I genuinely feel like he could be

the one onward to yesterday afternoon my friend Jess remember Jess was in town and we decided to meet up for coffee to catch up it had been a while since we'd seen each other and I was excited to share everything that had been happening in my life especially my blossoming relationship with Mike we picked a cozy little cafe the kind of place we used to frequent together and settled in with our drinks as we started chatting I couldn't help but gush about Mike I told Jess about how we met our amazing connection and how happy

I had been since we started dating I was expecting her to share in my excitement but as I recounted the story I noticed her demeanor changing she became quiet her expression shifting from interest to something more guarded and tense when I got to the part about breaking my long-standing rule of no s before the third date Jess's reaction turned out right weird and edgy I don't remember her exact words but she essentially accused me of having a fetish for handicapped people she implied that the only reason I found my relationship with Mike so fulfilling was

because he uses a wheelchair not because of who he is as a person or the effort he puts into our relationship her words hit me like a ton of bricks it's like you're only happy because he's in a wheelchair she said her tone dripping with judgment not because he's actually good for you or puts an effort in bed I was stunned Jess had always known me as someone who values deep genuine connections and her insinuation felt like a betrayal she continued saying that I had changed as a person and before I could even process what

she was saying she got up and left without saying goodbye 15 years of friendship and I had never seen her like that I sat there for a few moments trying to make sense of what had just happened her reaction was completely unexpected and hurtful it wasn't just about her disapproval of my relationship with Mike it felt like a personal attack on my character and values I had always thought that Jess understood and supported me and her sudden Outburst left me feeling isolated and misunderstood as I replayed the conversation in my head I couldn't help but

feel a mix of emotions I was hurt by her words confused by her reaction and worried about what this meant for our friendship Jess's reaction seemed to come out of nowhere and I couldn't understand why she would think so negatively about my relationship with Mike it was clear that something deeper was bothering her but at that moment I didn't know what it was all I knew was that my best friend had walked out on me without even saying goodbye 15 years of friendship and I've never seen her like that update my first ever update yay

uh so I do have an update on Jess and finally makes perfect sense and I have a slightly NSFW but funny story about Mike because this guy is just the best y'all after a restless night of turning over the conversation with Jess in my mind I knew I had to address the situation I couldn't let 15 years of friendship dissolve without at least trying to understand what had caused her to lash out so harshly so I finally mustered the courage to message her yesterday I'm still hurt by what you said I began but after 15

years of friendship I'd never forgive myself if I didn't at least ask why you snapped at me like that to my surprise Jess replied almost immediately her response was filled with regret and urgency that I hadn't expected I'm so sorry she wrote I didn't mean any of that can we have a do over on lunch despite my lingering hurt I agreed to meet her cautiously we arranged to meet at a cafe we both loved a place that held many fond memories from our shared past the next day I arrived a bit early nerves jangling as

I waited for Jess to show up I kept replaying our last conversation in my mind bracing myself for what she might say when she finally walked in she looked just as anxious as I felt we exchanged awkward smiles and a brief hug before sitting down Jess was the first to speak her voice shaky but Earnest I really am sorry about the other day she began I was completely out of line and I need to explain what's been going on with me let us pause for a moment turns out that those of you who said she

was jealous and that she might struggle with something and especially the person who said something might be going on in her relationship that's right there yeah all hit a bullseye Jess revealed that she was in town because she was job hunting she needed to move back in with her parents for a while a temporary but necessary step since her relationship had ended as she began to open up about the breakup the weight of her recent struggles became evident her relationship which had once seemed so promising had been slowly deteriorating due to a myriad of small

issues that had gradually piled up but the biggest issue the one that ultimately broke the relationship was their intimate life Jess explained that her boyfriend had never been particularly attentive or skilled in that area but recently things had gotten significantly worse she described how he made no effort whatsoever to ensure that she enjoyed their intimate moments what was once an occasional disappointment had turned into a constant source of frustration and sadness instead of feeling close and connected Jess often felt neglected and unsatisfied this neglect extended beyond their physical relationship affecting their emotional bond as well

despite her growing discontent Jess tried to address the issue constructively she approached her boyfriend with honesty expressing her feelings and suggesting ways they could improve their intimate life she hoped that open communication could bridge the gap and bring them closer together however her attempts to improve their situation were met with resistance and hostility her boyfriend reacted defensively dismissing her suggestions and feelings he told her that it was emasculating to receive intimate advice from a woman this response not only hurt Jess but also left her feeling hopeless how could they work through their issues if he

wasn't even willing to listen the situation continued to escalate every time Jess tried to discuss their problems her boyfriend's defensiveness grew he started to get angry when she wasn't in the mood completely ignoring the fact that his lack of effort was the reason behind her reluctance instead of understanding and working together to find a solution he chose to blame her for the growing distance between them the final straw came when during yet another heated argument about their intimate life her boyfriend suggested something that left her feeling deeply hurt and disrespected he had always had a

thing for Asian women a preference Jess was aware of but had never felt comfortable with in a misguided attempt to spice things up he asked her to dress in a kimono and pretend to be Asian this suggestion steeped in racist fetishism was not only offensive but also highlighted just how little he understood or respected her Jess just couldn't take it anymore so Jess had all of this bottled up and was hoping to talk to me and finally be able to put it down and I missed every hint that she had something big to discuss because

I was gushing about Mike she sat there trying to get a word in but I was too wrapped up in my own excitement to her it felt like I was just twisting the knife by bragging about how great our sleep together was I was oblivious going on and on about how amazing Mike was how connected we felt and how perfect everything seemed she tried to be supportive but as I kept talking I could see her patience wearing thin I didn't understand at the time that my joy was a painful reminder of what she was missing

in her own life then she snapped somewhere between what I was saying and what she wanted to talk about some wires got crossed she blurted out something incredibly dumb accusing me of having a fetish for handicapped people it was such a bizarre and hurtful thing to say completely out of left field I was stunned unable to comprehend why she would say something like that she didn't even wait for my reaction she just got up and left without saying goodbye 15 years of friendship and she walked out on me leaving me sitting there bewildered and hurt

it wasn't until later that I started to piece together what had happened she was mortified and ashamed of her Outburst but also irrationally mad at me not because of anything I did intentionally but because my happiness felt like a slap in the face to her misery Jess had hoped to talk about her breakup to finally unload the weight she'd been carrying instead she felt overshadowed by my excitement and lashed out in a moment of frustration and pain it was a perfect storm of miscommunication and unmet needs and it left both of us feeling isolated and

misunderstood one thing to know about Jess is that she's a terrible liar back in high school we jokingly called ourselves the co-founders of the foot and mouth Society because of this I believed her sincerity I told her that I forgave her and apologized for not realizing she needed to discuss something important she reassured me saying I was too ridiculously nice and had nothing to apologize for so I think we'll be okay for now I'm not ready for her and Mike to meet because I don't want to make things more awkward and she agrees with that

but she's genuinely happy for me hopefully this will just be a funny story we can laugh about someday so on to how Mike almost killed me l well last night we were talking about the Reddit post and he gets this funny expression that I'm starting to recognize it's the one where he's about to say something that's going to either make me laugh uncontrollably or leave me completely speechless he leans in with a mischievous grin and goes how do we know you don't have a fetish if we haven't at least tried it in the chair I'm

sitting there staring at him in disbelief and I can't help but laugh are you serious lol I ask half expecting him to say he's joking but he's not Mike nods earnestly and says he's never attempted it before because Q tears he's never felt so comfortable with a partner before my heart melts a little and I'm also kind of excited by the idea well he says still grinning why not give it a try and that's how we found ourselves in this ridiculous yet endearing situation his wheelchair has what is essentially a parking brake which as it

turns out is broken apparently getting it fixed is a major Hassle and pretty expensive so he hasn't prioritized it now picture this we're trying to get the motion of the ocean going but with every push the chair rolls backward it's like some weird awkward dance and instead of making progress we're inching our way across the floor we're both laughing so hard at the absurdity of it all which only makes it more difficult to keep our balance and focus at one point Mike just stops and through his laughter says maybe we need those wooden block things

they use to keep small planes from Rolling away you know like in Indiana Jones I lose it completely I'm laughing so hard I can barely breathe tears streaming down my face and he's giggling right along with me finally after what feels like an eternity of giggles and futile attempts I managed to calm down a bit I take a few deep breaths trying to regain my composure and look at him with the straightest face he can muster Mike says golly this sure is uncomfortable and that's it I'm gone if I had asthma I would have died

right there I laughed so hard I thought I pulled a rib making this awful wheezing noise as I tried to catch my breath Mike's laughing too rub rubbing my back and apologizing saying he couldn't resist so yeah confirmed no fetish here just a couple of idiots in love with terrible comedic timing I have no regrets though this man is the best thing that's happened to me and moments like these just make me love him even more update here's the Met Mike's family update and it's a doozy or at least felt like it at the time

for a girl who grew up with a small dysfunctional family so first up you know what people at least me don't think about when dating a guy who's always sitting height it's one of those things that just doesn't cross your mind I knew Mike was taller than me because when we cuddle he's taller sitting on the couch but I never really grasped how tall until this weekend so we drive up Friday night after work actually South and West LOL but to my brain it's always up in his vehicle which is modified to be driven entirely

using his hands neat right he's a really good driver too which was reassuring one more green flag and a sea of them we're chatting laughing and I'm getting a little nervous because this is the first time I'm meeting his family we finally get to the house and it's huge you guys like not a mansion but a sprawling one floor Rancher that just keeps going real estate was wild back in the day I'm already feeling a bit small next to this enormous house and then we get inside the next thing I know his mom comes to

greet us and I'm no slouch at 5'7 but she Towers over me she's got this warm welcoming smile that puts me at ease but it's possible to ignore that she's practically a giant we head into the living room and I meet his dad who funny enough is the only short one in the family then his youngest sister walks in holding her one-year-old daughter and she's also incredibly tall it's like stepping into a land of friendly Giants it's late so after quick introductions and some light conversation Mike shows me to his old room where we're staying

it's cute and full of nostalgic teenage memorabilia as we're getting ready for bed I casually ask hey so I don't know how this works and stuff but how tall are you Mike shrugs and says I don't know like a bit over six fall been a while since I checked a bit over six follower just casually throwing that out there so is everyone in your family tall I ask he Grins and says kind of the next morning I got to meet the rest of Mike's family properly and let me tell you it was like being introduced

to the Nordic basketball team actually they're Irish but they're all blonde and Tall so the image fits better the only one of reasonable height and still taller than me was his oldest sister it was kind of hilarious honestly they are also loud not in a shouting way just present their voices fill the room their laughter Echoes and their energy is undeniable Mike is a lot different around them but in the cutest way possible he beams all the time his happiness radiating off him you can see how much he loves being home with his family one

of his brothers greeted him by putting him in a headlock and giving him a dang noogie Mike of course elbowed him in the side and they both ended up laughing it was all so natural and full of love then his mom smacked one of his brothers with a rolled up magazine for putting his feet on the table and that set off another round of laughter the whole scene was a bit intimidating but in the happiest way imaginable I'll admit At first I felt a little overwhelmed and shut down this was a lot of energy to

take in and I wasn't used to such a boisterous family but Mike kept checking in with me giving me reassuring smiles and gentle touches to make sure I was okay his family noticing my initial discomfort went out of their way to include me in their conversations and Jokes which helped a lot after a bit I started to get into the spirit of things their warmth and genuine kindness were impossible to resist we had breakfast together and it was like a scene out of a movie with everyone talking over each other passing plates and sharing Stories

the atmosphere was chaotic but in the most welcoming way as the day went on I got to see more of this loving chaos in Mike's family played a game of basketball in their backyard and I watched in awe as they moved with a level of coordination and playfulness that only comes from years of sibling rivalry and bonding I forgot to mention that Mike has a specialized Sports wheelchair that he uses specifically for you guessed it Sports he and his siblings love playing basketball together and he is really good at it not only does he have

an impressive arm but he's also incredibly fast and the best part this wonderful guy I'm in love with Will gleefully and deliberately run run over someone's toes he actually aims for it his siblings have this hilarious reflex of yanking their feet back just in time and it's absolutely hysterical to watch seeing Mike in this environment made me appreciate him even more he was different here more relaxed and vibrant but still the same wonderful person I was falling for his family's love and acceptance were a big part of who he was and being welcomed into that

was an incredible feeling so it was this crazy day of loud people playing and having a blast nieces and nephews running around and just noise my ears are still ringing the food was catered in advance because his mom had seven babies all I make on Mother's Day is Margaritas they also have a pool it's a bit chilly still but the pool is heated so we actually all got to swim which was a lot of fun because I got to show off that I too am athletic I can do a backwards somersault off a diving board

yeah I'm a real catch law they at least pretended to be impressed we all stayed up late drinking and bitching about how it was too overcast to see the aurora boo The Sky Had promised a spectacular light show but the clouds decided to crash the party despite the disappointment we made the best of it talking and laughing well into the night by the time I crawled into bed I was already bracing myself for the inevitable hangover Sunday morning hit me like a freight train I had the worst hangover I've had in a while we slept

in a bit late trying to recover from the previous night's excesses when we finally dragged ourselves out of bed we joined Mike's family for the BBQ part of the BBQ weekend Mike's dad can Grill people and he's fast too food was coming off the grill at lightning speed perfectly cooked and smelling Divine I was amazed at how efficiently he handled everything I asked Mike about it and he laughed saying there were seven of us to feed ever see a nest of baby birds he had practice which fair enough watching his dad in action I could

totally picture a younger version of him surrounded by hungry kids grilling up a storm to keep everyone fed I don't have much experience with babies but during the BBQ I got to hold Mike's youngest niece she's the one living at home with his sister until her husband gets back from deployment she was such a sweet little bundle of energy and it was kind of heartwarming to have her in my arms while I was holding her Mike and I started talking lightly about kids in the future I confessed to him that I never really put much

thought into having kids but seeing how happy and close-knit his family is made me reconsider I told him if they were going to grow up in a happy home like yours and not how I grew up I'm pretty sure be open to having them with you someday I added but later I need you all to myself for a while first Mike's face lit up and he seemed really really happy about that his Joy was contagious and I felt all warm and fuzzy inside it made me feel all Goofy and happy too I'm sappy I know

but honestly I wouldn't trade these moments for anything we had to drive home Sunday night but before we left Mike's mom pulled me into a big warm hug she told me she had never seen her son so happy and thanked me for taking such good care of her baby it was one of those moments that felt both heartwarming and a bit overwhelming then she asked if we'd be back for the 4th of July or if we had plans with my family I tried to play it cool but my response was a bit awkward h no

we'll be here if you don't mind I don't see them much I think she picked up on the underlying story there because she just hugged the out of me Vikings all of them I swear and told me she couldn't wait to see me again as she hugged me I felt this incredible warmth and acceptance it was as if she understood without me having to explain anything her hug was so tight and reassuring and it made me feel like I was truly part of their family it was one of those rare moments where you feel completely

seen and appreciated for who you are driving home I couldn't stop thinking about the weekend meeting Mike's family had been an eye- openening experience they were loud loving and a bit overwhelming at times but they were also incredibly supportive and welcoming it was clear how much they cared for each other and being included in that Circle of Love was something special as we drove through the dark quiet roads Mike reached over and held my hand we didn't need to say much the connection between us was palpable the weekend had brought us even closer and I

knew that no matter what the future held we'd face it together my ears are still ringing from all the noise and chaos but it was an absolute blast and I can't wait to see them again in July also pretty much sure Mike is the man I'm going to marry I literally can't think of a single reason why I would ever let him get away anyway thanks for reading hope you all had a lovely weekend and those of you who got to see the aurora I'm happy for you but you suck LOL what do you think

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