Wife Dropped to Her Knees Crying, Begging Me to Drive Her to the Hospital After Her Ex Got in an...

wife dropped to her knees crying, begging me to drive her to the hospital after her ex got in an accident. Said she still loved him right in front of me. I took her there without a word.

What happened next changed everything. This happened yesterday and I'm still trying to process everything. I'm staying at a hotel right now.

My phone blowing up with texts and calls from my wife, but I can't bring myself to answer. We've been married for 4 years together for six. I thought we were solid.

I guess I was wrong. For some background, my wife, Julia, and I met through mutual friends. She had just gotten out of a 5-year relationship with this guy, Tony.

They were college sweethearts who stayed together after graduation. Julia told me they broke up because they wanted different things. She wanted to settle down.

He wanted to focus on his career. I never got the impression she still had feelings for him. In fact, she rarely mentioned him at all.

Fast forward to yesterday. We were having breakfast when Julia got a call. I watched her face go pale as she listened.

When she hung up, she told me Tony had been in a serious car accident and was in critical condition at County General. Then came the moment that shattered our marriage. She fell to her knees, literally sobbing, begging me to take her to the hospital because he might die and she still loves him.

I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. Still loves him after 6 years with me, 4 years of marriage. But I didn't yell or argue.

I just grabbed my keys and drove her to the hospital in complete silence. She didn't even notice. She was too busy frantically texting his family for updates.

When we got to the hospital, she sprinted through the emergency room doors without a backward glance. I followed at a distance and watched as she ran straight into the arms of Tony's brother. They hugged, both crying, and then she asked which room Tony was in.

I stood there for about 20 minutes, completely invisible. She didn't look for me, didn't call to see where I was. Nothing.

I left the hospital and went home. packed up my clothes, my personal documents, my laptop, and a few sentimental items. I left my wedding ring on the kitchen counter with a note that said, "You ran to him.

Stay there. " Then I checked into a hotel and turned off my phone. When I turned it back on this morning, I had 47 missed calls and dozens of texts from Julia.

I didn't mean it. Please come home. We need to talk.

I'm sorry, but I'm done. I can't be someone's second choice, their backup plan. I'm not sure what happens next, but I know our marriage is over.

I can't unhear those words. I can't unsee her running to him without a second thought about me. Edit for some additional context that people are asking about.

Yes, I know them both from before. Tony and I weren't friends, but we had mutual acquaintances. I knew who he was.

No, there weren't any warning signs I can think of. Julia never talked about him, never seemed to miss him, nothing. If anything, I thought she was completely over him.

I'm 34, Julia is 33, Tony is 35. We don't have kids, thankfully. I appreciate the support, but I don't think I'll be updating this post.

I need to talk to a lawyer and figure out my next steps. Update: 3 days later. I didn't expect to update this, but a lot has happened and writing it out helps me process things.

I finally answered Julia's call yesterday. She was hysterical, begging me to come home so we could talk. I agreed to meet her at a coffee shop instead.

I needed neutral territory. When I got there, she looked terrible, eyes swollen from crying, hair unwashed. I almost felt bad for her.

Almost. She launched into this whole speech about how she didn't mean what she said, that she was just shocked and emotional. That of course she doesn't still love Tony.

According to her, it was just the panic of hearing someone she once cared about might die. I asked her point blank, "If you don't love him, why did you say you did? " She fumbled over her words, saying, "I don't know.

I wasn't thinking straight. " I told her it was BS. People don't blurt out declarations of love in moments of crisis unless there's truth to it.

I asked her if she ever stopped loving him or if I was just a convenient replacement when he chose his career over her. That's when the truth finally came out. She admitted she wasn't completely over Tony when we started dating.

She thought being with me would help her move on and eventually it did. Or so she claims, but seeing him hurt and vulnerable in that hospital bed brought up old feelings. I asked if they'd been in contact all these years.

She swore they hadn't, but I don't know what to believe anymore. She kept saying we could work through this, that she chose me, that we have a life together. I reminded her that she didn't choose me at the hospital.

She forgot I existed. She had no response to that. I told her I'd already contacted a lawyer and would be filing for divorce.

She started crying again, saying I was throwing away our marriage over one mistake. But this wasn't just a mistake. This was a revelation of how she truly feels.

After I left the coffee shop, I went to pick up more of my stuff from our house while she was still out. That's when I found her phone on the charger. I know I shouldn't have, but I looked through it.

There were dozens of text messages between her and Tony from the past 2 days. Nothing romantic, mostly updates about his condition, but still, she lied about not being in contact. I took screenshots and sent them to myself.

Not sure if they'll matter for the divorce, but it confirmed what I already knew. I can't trust a word she says. I'm staying with my brother now, taking it one day at a time.

Update: One week later, things have escalated. Julia showed up at my brother's place last night completely drunk. She was pounding on the door, crying, creating a scene in front of all the neighbors.

My brother wasn't home, but I was. I let her in just to stop the noise. She threw herself at me, trying to kiss me, saying how much she missed me and needed me.

I pushed her away and told her she needed to leave. That's when she dropped a bombshell. Apparently, she and Tony had been texting occasionally over the years.

Nothing sensual or romantic, she claims, just checking in as friends. She never told me because she knew I wouldn't like it. I asked to see these texts and of course she deleted them all.

Convenient. Then she started getting angry. Said I was overreacting.

That lots of people stay friends with their exes. That I was being controlling and insecure. Real rich coming from someone who admitted to still having feelings for her ex.

I told her the divorce was happening whether she liked it or not. She switched tactics again, crying and begging for another chance. When that didn't work, she threatened to take me for everything in the divorce.

I reminded her that we have a print up and her face just fell. She'd forgotten about that. After she left, she sent me a text saying Tony had asked about me, that he felt terrible about the whole situation.

Apparently, he had no idea she would react like that, and he told her she was an idiot for throwing away our marriage. I don't know if I believe that, but it doesn't matter. This isn't about him anymore.

It's about Julia's betrayal. My lawyer says we can file the papers next week. I'm just ready to get this over with.

update. 2 weeks later, met with the lawyer today to finalize the divorce filing. Everything was going smoothly until I got a text from a number I didn't recognize.

It was Tony. He asked if we could meet and talk. My first instinct was to tell him to go to HL, but then I thought about it.

Maybe I needed this conversation for closure. We met at a bar downtown. He looked pretty rough.

Still had a cast on his arm and bruises on his face from the accident. He got straight to the point. He said Julia had been reaching out to him regularly over the years, not just occasionally like she claimed.

Nothing overtly inappropriate, but definitely more than just friends with texts. He showed me some of the messages. Lots of missing our talks.

Thinking about you today, that kind of stuff. Nothing I could definitively call cheating, but definitely crossing a line. The kicker, he said Julia had lunch with him a couple months ago when he was in town for business.

She never mentioned it to me. Not once. I asked him why he was telling me all this.

He said he felt guilty about the whole situation. He never encouraged her behavior, but he didn't shut it down either. And when he saw her at the hospital, the way she acted made him realize she'd been lying to both of us about her feelings.

I actually believe him. He seemed genuinely remorseful and he had nothing to gain by telling me all this. Before I left, he gave me a USB drive with copies of all their text exchanges over the years.

Said I might need it if she tries to contest the printup. When I got home, I looked through the texts. Six years of messages.

Six years of my wife maintaining an emotional connection with her ex behind my back. Some of the messages were sent on our wedding day, on our anniversaries, during vacations we took together. I don't even feel angry anymore.

Just empty. Like the past 6 years of my life have been a lie. Update: 3 weeks later, the divorce papers have been filed and served.

Julia's response was to show up at my workplace, creating a scene in front of my colleagues and clients. Security had to escort her out. My boss was understanding, but suggested I take a few days off until things calm down.

Later that night, Julia's mom called me. We've always gotten along, and she's a reasonable person. She said Julia told her everything, and while she doesn't condone what her daughter did, she thinks we should try counseling before throwing away the marriage.

I explained that the issue wasn't just what Julia said at the hospital. It was the years of deception that came before it. Her mom didn't know about the texts.

When I told her, she went quiet for a moment, then said, "I raised her better than that. " She apologized for calling and said she wouldn't pressure me anymore. The next day, Julia sent an email saying she'd agreed to the divorce terms.

No fighting, no contesting the printup. Then, she asked if I would meet her one last time before it's all finalized. I haven't responded yet.

Not sure if there's any point. In the meantime, I've started looking for my own place. Can't crash with my brother forever.

It's strange shopping for furniture and household items on my own after sharing those decisions with someone else for so long. But it's also freeing in a way. Every choice is mine alone.

Update. One month later, I agreed to meet Julia one last time against my better judgment perhaps, but I wanted to hear what she had to say. We met at the park where I proposed to her.

Her choice, not mine. Manipulative to the end. She looked better than the last time I saw her.

Composed, she said she'd started therapy to figure out why she held on to Tony all these years. According to her, it wasn't about Tony specifically. It was about what he represented, the life she thought she would have versus the one she ended up with.

I asked if that meant she settled for me. She said no, that she truly loved me. But part of her always wondered what if.

That's why she kept in contact with Tony to preserve that possibility, however remote. I told her that was the definition of keeping someone as a backup plan. She didn't have a good response to that.

Then she asked if there was any chance for us, any way to rebuild. I said no. Even if I could forgive the deception, I would never forget what she said that day at the hospital.

Those words would always hang between us. She started crying, saying she'd made the biggest mistake of her life, that she would do anything to fix it. I just said, "You already did everything.

That's the problem. " As I was leaving, she asked if we could still be friends. I laughed, not meanly, just at the absurdity of it.

After everything, she still doesn't get it. I told her once the divorce is final, I don't want any contact. She needs to respect that boundary at the very least.

I walked away feeling lighter somehow, like I'd finally put down a heavy load I'd been carrying. Update: 2 months later, the divorce is final. 6 years of my life wrapped up in a stack of papers.

Julia didn't contest anything in the end. She gave me the house which I'm selling. Didn't ask for alimony.

Agreed to a clean break. Her last text to me said, "I hope someday you can forgive me, even if you never forget. " I didn't respond.

Some things don't need a reply. I bought a condo downtown closer to my office. Started working out again.

Reconnected with friends I'd lost touch with during my marriage. It's not all smooth sailing. I still have nights where I lie awake wondering if there were signs I missed, red flags I ignored.

But those nights are becoming less frequent. Tony reached out again, asking how I was doing. Strange to think I don't hate the guy.

He's just someone who got caught up in Julia's inability to let go. Same as me. We're not going to be friends, but I don't wish him ill.

A client tried to set me up with her cousin last week. I declined. Not ready for that yet.

Maybe not for a long time. Need to figure out who I am on my own first. Update: 6 months later.

Haven't posted in a while because life has been busy in a good way. Got promoted at work. Took a solo trip to Italy that Julia and I had always talked about but never did.

Turns out traveling alone is pretty liberating. Ran into Julia at a mutual friend's birthday party last month. First time I'd seen her since the divorce was finalized.

She looked good, happy even. We exchanged awkward hells, then kept our distance for the rest of the night. As I was leaving, she caught me by the coat check.

said she'd been seeing a therapist regularly, working through her issues with commitment and honesty. Said the whole experience had forced her to grow up and face some hard truths about herself. I told her I was glad to hear it and I meant it.

I don't want her to suffer. I just don't want to be the one who suffers because of her anymore. She asked if we could get coffee sometime just to catch up as friends.

I told her I wasn't interested in rebuilding any kind of relationship. She looked disappointed but said she understood. On my way home, I realized I didn't feel much of anything seeing her.

No anger, no lingering love, no regret, just a recognition of someone I used to know intimately who now feels like a stranger. I think that's progress. Update: One year later.

A lot can change in a year. The company I work for opened a new office in Boston, and I volunteered to relocate. Needed a fresh start in a city without memories of Julia on every corner.

The night before I left, I got a letter from her. Handwritten, not an email or text. She said she was seeing someone new, someone who knew everything about our history and the mistakes she'd made.

She wrote that she'd finally let go of Tony completely, blocked his number, deleted all their old messages, said it took losing me to realize what she really wanted. She didn't ask for anything, no reconciliation, no friendship, not even a response. She just wanted me to know she was doing better and that she hoped I was too.

I didn't write back, but I didn't throw the letter away either. Boston is good. New job, new apartment, new routines.

I've been on a few dates. Nothing serious yet. It's strange navigating dating in my mid30s after thinking I was done with all that.

The rules seem different now. Everyone's a bit more cautious, a bit more upfront about what they want, and more cautious, too. More observant.

I ask more questions and really listen to the answers. I pay attention to inconsistencies, to things left unsaid. Not in a paranoid way, just in a self-protective one.

Sometimes I think about that morning. Julia on her knees, blurting out that she still loved Tony. How quickly my life changed with those few words.

I don't regret leaving. I regret not seeing the truth sooner, but I don't regret walking away once I did. I'm not angry anymore.

Anger takes too much energy, and I'd rather put that energy into building something new. Final update. 2 years later, this will be my last post about this chapter of my life.

I'm getting married again next month. Her name is Lee. We met in Boston at a work conference.

She's smart, funny, and most importantly, completely honest, sometimes brutally so. She knows my whole story and I know hers. We've both been burned before, so we're deliberate about our communication about not keeping secrets.

Julia sent a congratulatory text when she heard the news from a mutual friend. Simple, respectful. I thanked her and left it at that.

There's no animosity between us anymore, just acknowledgement of a chapter that's closed. Tony actually got married too to a woman he met during his physical therapy after the accident. Life has a strange way of working out sometimes.

Looking back on everything, I realize now that what happened was eventually going to happen in some form. The hospital incident just accelerated it. Julia and I weren't meant to last because she never fully committed to our relationship.

She always kept one foot in the past. I used to think the opposite of love was hate, but it's not. It's indifference.

And I can finally say I'm indifferent to Julia and what happened between us. It shaped me, but it doesn't define me. To anyone going through something similar, it gets better.

Not right away, and not all at once, but gradually, day by day, until one morning, you wake up and realize the pain isn't the first thing you feel anymore. Trust your gut. Stand up for yourself.

Don't accept being anyone's second choice. You deserve better than that. We all do.

Thanks for coming along on this journey with me. Wish me luck in this new chapter. TLDDR.

Wife admitted she still loved her ex when he got into an accident. I left her, filed for divorce, found out she'd been in touch with him our entire relationship. Two years later, I'm engaged to someone new, and finally at peace with everything that happened.

Story two. Apologies for any formatting issues as I am on my phone. I'm also sorry if this is the wrong place to post this, but I didn't know where else to go.

I work in a retail store with different departments. This involved the manager of my specific department. today.

He suggested that he, I, and the other colleague working our department go and help out on another department since we were finished for the time being and the other department was short staffed. This was nothing new and happens a lot. We all went down there and worked together for a bit.

He disappears. I assume he's just been called elsewhere and think nothing of it. I had left my phone to charge in the office, which I haven't done before today.

I was running very low though and needed it to last. I did hide it, but I understand it was stupid of me to leave it like that. I finish what I'm doing before I'm due back, but I head back anyway.

I go into the office to check my phone and find my manager with my phone in one hand, his phone in the other. I had approached close enough as he noticed me to see that he had his video recorder running on his phone, but he had managed to close my phone. His hands were shaking violently.

For clarification, I didn't know that he knew my password. I asked why he was on my phone and what the hell he was doing. He claimed he was just taking a picture of my Pokemon on Pokemon Go to send to a friend on Snapchat.

I then asked why would unlock my phone just for that. Why didn't he ask and why were his hands shaking? He says they aren't shaking but they are and really violently.

I unlocked my phone and he had closed the app so it was on the home screen. So I looked at my open apps list and there open was an extremely private video of me and my partner. I don't wish to elaborate, but I hope you can fill in the gaps divided by.

He had been recording this private video to his own phone. I freaked out and ran off to the staff area and to the toilets. By this point, I was crying hysterically and a manager of another department had seen me run in there.

She came to ask if I was okay. What was wrong? I said at the time, I couldn't say.

She said that was fine and to go home if I needed to. She suggested I get a drink and some fresh air. I went outside and my manager was out there.

He pleads with me to talk to him, that he's really sorry, trying to grab me, etc. , etc. I told him to leave me alone and do not touch, talk to me, and walked outside the car park as far as I could without leaving the site.

He thankfully didn't follow me. I called my friend to pick me up, went back inside to collect my stuff, and left. I called my boyfriend as soon as he got off work, and he urged me to call the store manager and report him.

My friend is saying to do this, too. I'm worried about reporting him because I feel like it will destroy my friendships with other colleagues who are also good friends with him and I don't want to do that. But I also know that I can't go back to work with him anymore.

It feels like a lose-lose for me. I like my job besides what happened today and I don't want to lose it. But I feel like if I don't leave and report him, I'll be driven out.

I'm sorry this is all so jumbled, but my head is a mess and so worried and mortified and upset. He had texted me apologizing saying he deleted the video he took. But how do I know this?

What if he took more than one video? What if he distributes this? That's not only damaging to me, but my poor partner, too.

What if I let him get away with it and he ends up doing it to someone else? I can't trust him. I don't know what to do.

I feel so violated. My boyfriend is going as far to suggest police. I don't want to do that, but I have to do something.

Does anybody have any advice on how to go about this? Again, I'm sorry for how jumbled and ridiculous my words may sound, but I can't think straight. Thank you all.

TLDDR: My manager recorded an extremely private video of myself and my partner from my phone. My partner is pushing to me to report, but I'm worried about consequences, going as far as to suggest police. Desperately seeking advice on what steps to take next.

Edit: Hello everyone. I just woke up and it's the next day. I want to sincerely thank everyone of you who commented and gave advice.

I am eternally grateful. I have to go to work in about an hour and I am going straight to the store manager and or HR and reporting this once I get there. Many of you are suggesting I go straight to the police as well and I am strongly considering it as people have said he may still have traces of the video that I definitely want destroyed.

I need to speak to my boyfriend first though because I'm scared of dealing with the police on my own. So far, I'm definitely going to be seeing a manager though. I will post an edit at the end of it.

Again, my deepest gratitude. I will try to respond to comments when I get some time. You guys are fantastic.

Thank you. Update. Hello everyone.

First of all, big apologies for how long overdue this update is. Since the rules limit me for one update only, I wanted to have the most full outcome to give you. Thank you all so so much for your help and support and advice.

I didn't expect so many people to respond to me and I really am grateful. Sadly, the outcome isn't so happy. My conclusion from the original post was to go to highest management first and then police if the result wasn't satisfactory, which is what I did.

I went straight to the store manager the morning after my post and was advised to write up and sign a formal grievance, which I did. I then met with two other managers to discuss the details of what happened and any other relevant stuff. They told me they'd talk to the manager in question and any witnesses and get back to me in a week after investigations had taken place.

In the meantime, my manager was not allowed to work with me and was told to reschedule all his shifts or work elsewhere. A week passed and I heard nothing. When I went to find out, apparently due to staff holidays, it couldn't be completed in time.

I asked how much longer and was told a week. I felt this was too long and was really restless by this point already. And so my boyfriend came with me to speak to the police.

We explained the situation and my details were taken down. And then we met with a sergeant. To summarize, she told us that in the UK, there is no specific law against accessing someone's private phone.

Recording off someone's private phone without permission. As such, they are unable to search his phone as no arrests can be made. The only thing they could do was go to his house and explain it had been reported and that if he ever distributed it, he would be arrested, which they did, and he lied to the police and said he hadn't done anything.

Sadly, they said there was nothing more they could do. The internal investigation then concluded and I was told my manager had denied everything, made up a false excuse for the apology text he sent me and basically called me a liar. They told me that there is no CCTV where it happened and nobody who was in the area at the time saw anything.

No SHT. They were the complete opposite end of the room as I had already explained. They tried to say they weren't taking sides, but to be honest, it seemed like they were.

They're moving me from the department instead of him because moving him is harder. I really enjoyed my job and now basically I have to suffer because my manager is a disgusting liar. They don't seem to care how serious this is.

I ended up almost crying when they legitimately said maybe you didn't see anything at all. I feel like they're accusing me of lying and imagining it. Even though one of the managers involved was the one that caught me in the corridor balling my eyes out.

I really wish I could have given a happy update. I'm so upset that I have to move and give up something I enjoy when he gets off without even a slap on the wrist. goes on knowing he can probably do this again to someone else and carry on being the scumbag he is.

Not to mention, he might still have the videos. He may have distributed them already, but how the HL would I know? I have no idea what to do now.

The police say nothing else can be done. If anyone has any legal advice around this issue within the UK law, then I would be very very grateful for that. Sorry for the length and if it's worded badly.

Again, thank you all for your advice and sorry this was a bad update. TLDDR went to hire management and police about how I caught my manager recording a private video from my phone to his phone. He lied to both.

Management say not enough evidence to do anything. He gets to keep his job, but I have to lose mine. Police say nothing can be done due to no UK law surrounding the subject.

Thank you so much for watching until the end. If you really like our videos, please don't forget to like, share, and subscribe. Have a great day.