Sometimes people's life is not working because their excuses still are. When you look at the last 12 months, what got put on hold? What got sidelined?
What were you going to do? You said you were going to do it or you really wanted to do it, but it got put on hold. Why did it put on hold?
And is that reason good enough? I'll give you my example. There was a specific book project uh that got put on hold.
I moved towards another book project, but this one got put on hold. Now the hard question why that book project that got put on hold there was a reason for it. But if I'm honest that was not a good enough reason.
I should have progressed that. I absolutely am comfortable saying I should have done that. Now some people when they say I should have done that they feel shame, guilt or upset.
I'm like no shame, no guilt, no upset. Just radical honesty. I should have moved it forward.
I can own that. I can take personal accountability and personal responsibility without shame. You can be responsible without the shame.
So I'm like, "Yep, should have done that. " Lesson learned right there. I let this excuse sideline my progress.
That was not a sufficient excuse. I should have worked through that better. I could have been more conscious and thoughtful.
I could have rearranged my day. I definitely should have worked through that better. We live in a world I know where everyone's liked don't say should because people when you say should they shame.
I'm like not if you're conscious you can be accountable. In fact I think most the world is struggling right now because they can't be accountable without trashing their identity without dipping into shame or regret. I can honestly look at that and go yep should have kept that going.
No anger just next time and now I know that reason was not no I could work through that okay cool now I'm developing discernment see some people they never develop discernment over their excuses their excuses show up for them year after year after year after year and it's like but your life isn't working sometimes people's life is not working because their excuses still are. Let me say it again. Sometimes people's life is not working because their excuses still are.
They never look at that excuse and said, "Is that a really good excuse? Let me be honest about it. " Now, sometimes the excuse is great.
Something terrible happened. Something was outside your control and it just got side railed, derailed. There wasn't You didn't want it.
Something bad happened to your house. Something bad happened medically. somebody did something irresponsible.
Wasn't your fault. You had no control. Nothing could be done.
Um, but you can also in those situations say, "Okay, it's true. It wasn't my fault. I wasn't in control.
However, have I bounced back at the level I need to. Have I taken back control of the reigns of my life? I know people who are still blaming CO.
I'm like, yo, uh, nothing that happened back then needs to be guiding your decisions now. I'm not saying there's not lingering effects. I'm not saying that that wasn't a tough time in life, but we're years later.
Your progress now has to be a decision now. Yes, we could blame everything. I could blame lots of things, but the question isn't did that thing cause a problem because maybe it did.
The question is, am I bouncing back now? Am I taking the actions to increase my intention and my generative powers today? I can look at hundreds of situations of the past.
I could say, "Well, that's why I didn't bounce back. " And in every one of those, I would be justified, wouldn't I? Like, if you're empathetic with me and I told you the reason I haven't bounced back in my life is these five things, if you're empathetic, of course you're going to say, "Yeah, that sounds right.
I I believe you. Your feelings are important. " But if you're a coach and you care about me and we have an honest relationship where tough love can happen, you can also say, "Yeah, those things did happen.
" And make good decisions for yourself now. Practice good things for yourself now. Take life back by the reinss to the level that you can control what you can now.
Don't let that thing h yeah that happened but right now do good things for yourself now. Every day take good actions for yourself now. Live with high character now.
Start being a good person taking action. giving, being generous, being loving, being happy. Allow that now.
Even though you're right, those things happened. That's a hard place for people to get to, but it will change your life forever. So, when you look at those things that you put on hold, I just want you to have the courage and the honesty and accountability to look at why did that thing get put on hold and was that reason good enough?
It was an external reality. Probably true. But if that thing was important, if you determine it was important, maybe it's time to bring it back and push it forward.
Like that book project I'm talking about. I'm bringing it back and I'm pushing it forward. I I really should have kept it going, but I let the world get better of me.
I didn't re be as resilient. I could have got back on track, but I didn't. And I can own that.
I OWN IT. OH GOD, I OWN IT. All right.
Be honest, Brandon. Yeah, I own it. Now, move forward.
You can own it and move forward. or if the reason you put it on hold is it didn't matter. Let it go.
If it didn't if it's not relevant now, it does not matter now. You don't need any should and could there. So again, this is about having a philosophy of what matters.
You have to determine that thing that got put on hold. Does this still matter? If it does, bring it back.
When you look at the last 12 months, what declined? Was there anything that went into decline? Like it it it didn't normalize or grow like it declined?
Did your health decline? Did your money decline? Did your customers decline?
Did your relationship with your teenage son decline? Like where was there something that is falling off or declining? I want you to be vitally aware of that.
If it is falling off or it's declining because you just chose not to give it attention because again you have a philosophy that that doesn't matter. It's not meaningful. It's not the priority.
Then you can sit with it and be like I'm good that that's declining. But I want you to be aware at all times when something is declining. If there's a choice to be made, right?
It's fine if something's declined. I just don't want you to be unaware when something's declining. Like if if you're okay with it declining, that's one thing.
But I think a lot of people are always surprised when there's decline and it happens when it hits crisis, when the things, you know, really in trouble. I don't want you to wait until things are really in trouble anymore. Like if your finances are declining, it's time to address that.
you need to either a don't spend as much or b find a way to generate more. And the truth is most people should do both. Sometimes we spend too much and we don't generate enough.
And we got to find new strategies, new philosophies, new practices to do both of those things. But sometimes your relationships are in decline. And a lot of people, they let their marriage decline year after year after year.
And then they're so shocked when the person ends it. Like I work with couples all the time. Did you not see it declining?
Well, yeah, I did. Well, what did you do when you saw it declining? Well, I tried once.
What did you try? Well, I suggested date night. Okay.
When did you try suggest that? Well, I suggest that in February. Okay.
It's December. Did you go on any date nights? Well, no.
I suggested one time. They didn't do it. And then, so you gave up on the philosophy of date night.
See, what happens is we try one thing and then we give up and we let things decline. If something is declining, you try one thing. two, three, three, four, five, six.
If something is declining, you try again, again, again, again, again, and again. If something is declining, you don't let it die. If it's important to you, you go, "Oh, I need to go in SWAT mode and not let that decline.
" If it continues to decline, and you are in SWAT mode and you are trying, and you are trying, and you are trying, and you are trying, and it continues to decline, wrong philosophy, wrong set of practices, irrelevant thing. be okay. Call spade a spade.
It's not going to work. End it. Quit it.
That's fine. I have no judgment or advice to you on this. I just want you to be aware when you look back last 12 months.
What declined? Why did it decline? And again, are you okay with it declining?
If you are, that's one decision. If you aren't, SWAT team that thing. Hey, my friend.
Sun is going down behind me and I just want to thank you for watching my YouTube channel. You know, so many of my subscribers are always asking me, Brendon, how do I go to another level of my life and stay consistent in my personal development and really get progress? You know, we all want to be more motivated, more productive, more confident.
We want to be better leaders. We want to be better at our craft. But how do you do that on a consistent basis?
Well, that's why I built Growth Day. It's an app that you can use that builds your personal growth streak that every day you come in and you do a series of actions and you listen to some inspirational training and life strategies that advances your life. It's very hard to stay consistent in your life.
I know sometimes you watch a YouTube video, you read a book here, you listen to a podcast there, but you're not developing your habits. You're not scoring yourself. you're not finding real progress and insight that kind of wows you and and opens up to I say the awe and the real agency that you have in life.
So please go to Growth Day in the app store. Just go to the app store, go to Growth Day or go to growthday. com and get Growth Day.
I promise you with your 7-day free trial, you'll go through a growth day and in seven days you'll be like totally totally like feeling fired up, but also you'll find a new momentum cuz every day as you do your growth streak, you start to really discover what you're made of. And we access different parts of your brain. You're listing something inspirational.
You're doing a checklist or doing a journal prompt that blows your mind. You're scoring your habits and reflecting on your day in ways you've never done before. We're basically taking all of personal development and putting it into a streak that you'll get like totally addicted to.
You'll be addicted to that progress, that growth, that joy and energy that you deserve to feel every day. Go to growthday. com or go to the app store and just download the Growth Day app.
Start your 7-day free trial and let's level you up. Every day is a great day to grow, but you have to stay consistent to get real progress and to really change your life. Go to growthday.
com or go to the app store and get the Growth Day app right now. [Music] When you look at the last 12 months, what angered you and why? What angered you?
What made you upset? What was it? Is it something about the world?
Was it a big fight you had in your marriage or with the one of your kids? What angered you and why did it anger you? Are you okay if that situation happened again to experience that same level of anger?
Was it justified? Could you have been in a different place? Could you handle it differently?
Again, no advice here. I just want your awareness to the matter. It's like it's important that we learn and observe where we get very angry or very frustrated to use a different tone here or a different word if it helps.
Like I'm always attentive like where did I get angry? Where did I get frustrated and where was it very heightened and am I okay with it being heightened like that next time or do I need to learn a different internal viewpoint? Do I need a different internal skill set?
Do I need to find a different level of centeredness? Do I need to adjust my own attitude or philosophy there to ensure that that doesn't happen at those levels that it did in the last 12 months? Where did you hold back?
Where did you play half-hearted? Where did you pretend to be somebody else? Where did you hold back your real strength, your real opinion, your real powers?
Where did you hold back? You what situation? Where was something was going on and you just you held back?
You could have stepped up, you didn't. Or you held back an opinion that was really important and you and if you had shared it, it would have been great for the business. or you know, you're kind of half-heartedly doing your social media content or you're kind of half-heartedly doing your business.
You're kind of holding back if you're honest. Where did you hold back in the last 12 months? Why did you hold back?
Why are you okay with that? Should you have done something different? Is there something you can learn there?
What got put on hold and why? What declined and why? What angered you and why?
What did you hold back on and why? The whole point is to be aware of those things to ask, is that what you wanted? Is that how it should have gone?
Are you upset? Are you good? Like just being attentive to that can be truly transformative in your life.
I know that's not the most fun part, but I also think that's a part that is really powerful when we look back and just ask the questions. Okay. Um, now more of the fun part.
I'm going to have you look back for some more positive things as well. And so, first I'm going to look internally in my own life. Where in the last 12 months did I show character andor generosity?
When I think of the last 12 months, where where was their character? Where did I make a good decision? Where did I do something that was hard?
Where did I struggle through and follow my ethics, my beliefs, my values? Where did I show up as a moral and a good person? Um where did I demonstrate character, like strength through difficulty?
Like where did I stay true to my word when it would been easier to lie? Like look back through the year and go where where was some character? Where did I show that up?
Was it an argument with somebody? You showed some character by showing restraint. Was it by sticking through something that was difficult when you could have quit?
Was it by knowing that you were doing the right thing for yourself when other people didn't get it? Like, but it was true to your character. Like, where were you to your character last year?
those moments, those character making moments, those character demonstrating moments, I bet you don't give yourself a lot of credit for those. And that's why you lack a lot of confidence. See, when we don't integrate those character-winning moments, we never have a strength, a foundation of character, which is confidence.
Also look back for generosity. Were you generous? Where were you generous?
Were you generous? Why were you generous? Who were you generous for?
Like absorb that. Take that in. Be proud of that.
Feel that sense. Integrate those wins. Looking back at last year, I also look at friendship and love.
Where was great friendship this last year? Who were my great friends this last year? What did I do with my friends this last year?
And I just look at the last 12 months. I think of like where did friendships emerge? Who showed up?
What did I do that felt like it was friendship at work, in life, in business? Where was friendship, you know, in in terms of my priority for the year? And then love.
How loving was I with with, you know, the people who I care the most of in life. Like when I think about love, did I sense also I'm trying to find the words. It's like, did I also live through love?
Did I feel a sense of loving in my heart? Was I heart-c centered this year? But where did love show up?
What do the people who love me, how did they show up this year? Where were the good moments this year that we had? This is like to me this like the good memory section.
It's like the good memory section of character, generosity, friendship, and love. And then I asked the question, okay, how do I bring more character, generosity, friendship, and love into this next year? For the people who I love, what can I do for them next year?
For the people I have friends, what can we do together this next year? for the projects I'm taking on where I know I'm going to struggle. How can I bring some character and generosity into those?
I love this section. Last piece I know is a evaluative framework that people want usually from me this time of year. They're like, "Okay, I'm going to go month by month or event, you know, event by event in my calendar.
What should I look for to help me reset, Brendan? " And often I'll just teach the four Ps. I'll go look back and ask was there purpose there in that event or that month or that situation.
Was there purpose? Was meaning was the thing that you were doing mattering in terms of like was it purposeful? But also did you bring intention and purpose into it?
Were you purposefully living in that situation, in that moment, in that relationship? Was there purpose there? Yes or no?
Was there progress there? Did the thing get better? I focused on it.
Did it get better? Did we move it forward? Like, is it growing?
Is there real progress there? Or is it declining? Is there progress?
Yes or no? It's kind of like, okay, well, how do I get more progress into this next year? Was there positivity there?
Was there a positive range of emotions consistently there or was it just all over the place? Was there a positive range of emotions? Did I bring those positive ranges of emotion with me or did I just hope to get out of it?
And fourth, the presence of bliss or magic or spirituality? Like was there some magic there? When I look back at each month, I'm like, was there some magic?
Was there a presence of of bliss or magic or spirituality? I I don't know the word. I just use the word presence.
Um, but there was something special there. Was there something special going on that month in that event? In that situation?
I'm looking for that presence of bliss, magic, spirituality. Was there a certain vibe or pop there that's just different? I'm looking to identify those places in my life where those four Ps are present.
There's purpose, there's progress, there's positivity, and there's presence of something magic. And there's not always uh you know not every month has those things in abundance. Not maybe not every line of my work has it.
But I'm like whenever that's there I'm like oo pay very close attention when those four things are there. Pay a lot of attention. I sense purpose here.
I sense progress here. I sense positivity here. I I sense there's a presence of something magic here.
Explore that. Go deeper there. And if you've never experienced that, put that on your board for next year.
Build those things in your life like no matter what, I'm going to have more purpose next year, more progress, more positivity, more presence of magic. And that gives you something to aim for, a philosophy, a practice to go after. This next year should be extraordinary.
Aim the headlights forward into a transformative next chapter of your life. Next year should be more conscious. Next year should be more generative.
Next year should be more positive. And some people don't like the word when I say should, but I'm like, why not? Why not aim for something higher?
Why not desire something even better? Why not have that hope and that faith that you can build an extraordinary quality of life for you and your family if you just keep showing up consciously living out that intention, that philosophy with great practices of kindness and care in your own life for other people. I feel like we could all live and we can all love and we can all matter at levels we never anticipated if we just start aiming our life towards those things more often than looking backwards or making excuses.
We have an extraordinary opportunity each day to have that golden ticket to wake up and live our life to choose what that life is going to be like and I feel like that's a blessing that we all get to do that on this journey here in growth day and progress mode together that we could keep get learning like this all year together. I'm so grateful for it. I know it's a year where we could say, "Oh, so many so many changes are going to come.
I'm scared of them. " Like, no. Be the change.
Be the change. Don't wait for the change. Don't be fear of change.
You be the change in your own life. Be the catalyst of change in your own life to architect the future that you want. That's truly generative.
And that's the things that will give you great self-respect, satisfaction, and joy in your future as well.
