30 Minutes of the Craziest Animal Stories Told on the Joe Rogan Podcast

he is the only jaguar in the United States that's been spotted in the United States they used to be prevalent yeah when the the Pioneers came across the country they they spotted multiple Jaguars they were everywhere there there's even sightings of jaguars in the northern states but um for whatever reason they either were wiped out or whatever happened but there's a Jaguar that keeps traveling from Mexico and that's El Hefe there he is I wonder how long jaguars live for like LIF well they know this one Jaguar because they've taken so many Trail camp photos

of it their spots are you know there you can identify them from their spots if you get still photos resolution yeah and this this one Jaguar is just this lone 200b cat that makes his way through and he's just [ __ ] up dear that is wild that is wild amazing amazing animal if there's only one if they're everywhere you're [ __ ] yeah it's kind like wolves you ever seen a wolf [ __ ] huge gigantic and you're like man that's pretty scary well we eradicated them and then these [ __ ] Eco people

like we need to bring them back they're our friends you don't have the right to tell my 14-year-old daughter she has to carry her rapist baby you understand that to look that woman in the eye who's who was the born ofap you understand that that's a 14-year-old child if you a 14-year-old child gets raped you say that they have to carry that baby I don't think two wrongs make a right I don't think murder I don't think murder is an answer to I don't think murder fixes a rape what if we're talking about an abortion

when the fetus like L literally it's like 6 weeks 4 weeks 3 days what if she just turned positive just now positive for pregnancy I don't I well I just disagree that what if it just happened to you can like draw a line on wi once life I I would lay it out like this I would say it is wrong to intentionally kill an innocent human life abortion intentionally kills an innocent human life therefore abortion is wrong I don't think any of the examples of like oh well how developed is it you know can it

can it think is it conscious can it dream can it feel pain so for you it's the moment of conception I think that if it's a if it's a human life an IND distinct human life then I think it's wrong to to end its life I said what's the biggest one you ever seen cuz we' seen 15t Crocs like every 20 minutes every half an hour we see a 15ot yeah no giant freaking yeah and uh so we're fishing for Monday and and I keep thinking like I don't know when you got one in line

is like a shark will it bite that thing or whatever and anyways we started asking the guy what's the biggest one you ever saw and he said might the biggest one I ever saw was about 28 ft 28 ft 29 ft maybe and he said he's only seen it once and he saw it from about a kilometer away and they estimated the size and he said this guy these guys in a helicopter saw it once and it doesn't stay in the river it stays out in the ocean and he said it's so smart it knows

it's in silty water where nothing can see it there's nothing as big as it it it owns its territory you know 28 ft yeah and he said that he said that the back we're in the 6ft boat and he said if this thing he goes I I tell you this how big they are he goes this one would be he said if it was under our boat it would be sticking out about four to six feet on either side across its back sideways and we're in a six foot wide boat so he said it'd be

like 15t across the back its back like that's how what the [ __ ] so think of the girth do you know about the giant chimps that they found in the cono like 6 ft tall they weigh over 300 lb that one with the guys are taking the photograph with it the Dead one that's legit they shot this one at an airport in the Congo and it's [ __ ] huge I mean they had two different words for chimps one was treat beaters and the other one was lion Killers that's a giant [ __ ]

chimpanzee it's way bigger than normal and one of the things about them is they have these crests down their the top of their skull like a mohawk that gorillas have but chimps don't normally have that so they're an odd sub species and there's not that many of them they're in this one area of the Congo it's really interesting I just think um you know it's just horrific to watch a monkey get eaten by a chimp no but the real deal is that's who we are we talk be human beings we're animals taught to be human

beings and just like some animals some are more intelligent some learn faster than others that's why some of us are still in the animal stage of life right said there was an animal that was a bipedal hom that lived on alongside of human beings oh interesting an enormous one it's called gigantopithecus it's absolutely real in the Pacific Northwest there was well it was in Asia and this was during the time before the ice age when the bearing land bridge was available he found these enormous Prim teeth and he was like what the [ __ ]

is this and where'd you get this and it led to an investigation they found the site where these things were recovered and they found more and they found uh jaw bones that would indicate that this animal is bipedal which means it stood up on two legs and was [ __ ] enormous like 8ft tall gorilla like orangutang like creature that existed alongside human beings okay but we don't know exactly like when did the we know for a fact that they existed ,000 years ago because of these bones but that doesn't mean that it didn't exist

50,000 years ago or 10,000 years ago we don't know and if they did exist 10,000 years ago it makes sense why the Native Americans would have many many names for these creatures and they didn't really have mythical creatures we have evidence that somebody had the capacity to explore the world during the last ice age one of the things I find most striking is the presence of Antarctica on ancient maps because we didn't Discover it until 1820 and edits on maps drawn in the 1500s with great detail which again were based on much older Source maps

that have now been lost to us they call it the southern land and it's larger than it is today but it was larger than it is today during the Ice Age what the [ __ ] is it doing on a map drawn in the 1500s which we know was based on older Source Maps when nobody knew it existed in the 1500s to me the obvious answer is we are dealing with the Fingerprints of the Lost Civilization that mapped the world and that left evidence of that mapping which ancient map makers found and used and incorporated

into their Maps these Maps can be very confusing because they were trying to mix exploration data from their own period with data from the older Maps but when you look at these maps in depth they're very very intriguing when you go back that guy killed 10% of the population they find out that during that time the the carbon level like people burning fires decreased at a significant measure meble percentage cuz there was less humans they think they killed somewhere between 50 and 70 million people during his lifetime dude they were lighting corpses on fire and

launching them with catapults on people's houses to burn them down when they would Siege a city they would stay outside of the city thousands and thousands of Mongolians just ready to kill then they would capture people who flee and they would take those people and put them on the front of the line and March them forward like a human shield and that's how they would get into some of the civs since 2003 study found evidence that git kon's DNA is present in about 16 million men alive today what was weird about Antarctica there's nothing there

so if you want to go see the emperor penguins or all of the wildlife that is available you can't go to the interior of Antarctica which is is where we were it's a full-on camp fully set up like Library indoor packing area for us to do our parachutes bathrooms showers really nice tents it's fully established there's a blue ice Runway we flew in on at 757 what's a blue ice Runway the runway you land on is straight [ __ ] ice it's crazy holy [ __ ] you just land on Ice straight up blue ice

those are the tents we were standing in right there that one you're the hovering over there those are the kind of tents that we were staying underneath that jacket is a T-shirt and I'm wearing the long sleeve because I didn't want exposure to the Sun and that's how like wrap your face like the sun down there will absolutely nuke you really yeah and this is probably like I don't know this could be [ __ ] 3 in the morning sun just never goes down how much food do they have up there as much as you

could possibly want they had a full like dining facility the setup there is unbelievable and they never had any Wildlife up there ever there's Millions upon millions of penguins M but there's no food source in the interior are ligers real yes liers are real they also have some weird growth thing going on whatever regulates growth doesn't work on them that's a liger yeah they're so huge they're like way bigger than regular look at the belly on that guy though yeah they're [ __ ] giant dude whether it's the male tiger [ __ ] the female

lion I think that's how it goes apparently when it does happen one of the sides is supposed to get the gene for regulating growth from the woman but it doesn't get it from the woman or it doesn't get it from the man because the man's a tiger the man's a lion however the combination was but because it's a male and a female they make this new thing that doesn't know when to stop growing so just keeps growing I think they can appear in the wild but they don't live in the wild together yeah but they're

two animals that are from different part different continents you know what I mean so somebody had to put them together at some not only that they're not viable so they're hybrids and it's a hybrid that's not viable even though a lion and the tiger probably look more similar they're not the same thing that baby's a hybrid so those hybrid babies they can't reproduce yeah they can't produce more ligers exactly so it's a they're one lit animal if a [ __ ] gorilla didn't exist imagine seeing a gorilla be like Jesus Christ what the [ __

] is that thing 6' 600 lb hking shoe hairy black beast with a giant chest and enormous arms and pounds on his chest runs on all fours and like [ __ ] fangs when they fly through the air at each other and Clash smash into each other and fight holy [ __ ] man if you didn't know that was real I know and you ran into a gorilla you'd be like what the [ __ ] and by the way they didn't know mountain gorillas were even a thing until the early 1900s they were a legend

yeah yeah yeah when was the discovery of mountain gorillas they think those giant chimps in the Congo are are hybrid no they don't anymore because they have DNA they they're they're the only chimpanzee species or subspecies I guess you'd say that they found that has a Crest on its skull like a gorilla 1902 bro damn yeah do gorillas ever eat meat or they're just they're just vegetar not gorillas no gorillas are we are closer to chimpanzees than chimpanzees are gorillas there's a location in the western Sahara Desert of morania called the rot struct structure it's

also commonly referred to as the eye of the Sahara and what's so spectacular about this is that it just so happens to match to what Plato had described as the Lost ancient capital city of Atlantis Plato had described Atlantis as made up of concentric circles three of water two of land which matches the rot structure it also is said to have an opening to the Sea at the South and if you look at it from satellite imagery you can clearly see that water had ran through it and what people don't realize is that Sahara Africa

up until about 4,500 to ,000 years ago was totally green it was tropical it had one of the largest networks of rivers ever known to exist it was said to have mountains to the north and you just so happen to have mountains called the Atlas mountain chain but it goes further than that turns out that the Sahara Desert is one of the least studied places on Earth there's so much that points to that possibly being Atlantis what the [ __ ] is the purpose of those arms and there's the only animal that I can think

of that developed that way and was that uh was he a plan eater no T-Rex oh T-Rex yeah I'm think T-Rex was they they don't know if T-Rex was a predator or if T-Rex was a scavenger they think by the shape there's some some talk that by the shape of his bones he might have been doing was using those bones to crush giant dinosaur bones and that like he might be surviving on on dead things yeah and that they had some speculation that they might have had had they don't want know what they really looked

like cuz they don't know the skin color they had some speculation that they might have had faces like vultures like red [ __ ] up really brightly colored faces just to let you know they're disgusting like when you see vultures it's not a coincidence that they're the grossest [ __ ] looking animal on the planet and all they eat is dead [ __ ] and they're big vultures are [ __ ] big man that's a big animal flopping around with these giant Wings redac stupid bird yeah if every animal in the world had to fight

who do you have winning everything in the tigers tiger beats a grizzly bear wait it's a it's a big cat tiger over Bear yeah big cat tiger over a lion yeah oh interesting yeah bigger this just tigers are the Kings that's the real king of the jungle it's not a lion and they're piss lions live in the savanas Anyway by the way don't they do they live in the jungle they call him the king of the jungle but jle are they actually in the jungle thank you it their real habitat is the open Savannah where

they can hunt mammals such as gazel antelopes and zebra they may also cooperate to catch larger mammals such as Buffalo giraffes and even crocodiles yeah so that's a [ __ ] name the the tiger is the king of the jungle and they live in the [ __ ] jungle that's a really interesting the K the jungle that's like what I've seen from tigers have seem to be more aggressive they go for the throat they go for the kill whereas lions are more I'll just pound you and play with you yeah CU like kitten it's it's

like the difference between a wol and like my dog Marsh it's just this massive lion and to have him charge me on foot it was pretty terrifying so you talking about something that's twice the size of a normal lion I would say like a yeah yeah 25 to 50% larger I mean the paws were just it's just I'll show you on my phone I can send it to you guys but it's just huge huge big black man unbelievable animal so that's when he's Tred yeah so that's see see the dark in his back oh my

God that's just a picture of picture but that's the time he pops up when uh we go to check on him oh my god dude he's so big huge huge and there's some pictures you you'll see in a second of him on the ground when we're doing the workup is that him right there yeah putting a collar on him Jesus he's jacked I mean just a massive massive animal do you guys know how look at the size of his sack yeah he's hung Jesus they used to be a North American line that was even larger

than the African line significantly yeah significantly crazy yeah and that was not that long ago right like when the last 15,000 years ago or something like something like that I believe it was definitely coexisted with human beings what about uh giant sloths I've had probably 3 years of research into giant sloth there is in my opinion one location on Earth it's in high Peru where nobody goes it's a bowl of mountains impenetrable the only way in is a helicopter in the center to me that that ball is going to be like a primordial Eden all

of the cultures surrounding it have old stories of giant slots Mana Pugi I believe is how it's said it's the South American name for giant sloths they all have different names for it but they all have these stories of these giant sloths right they were all hunted to Extinction however they've handed down these Traditions but nobody except for you know a tiny handful of like far out tribal people have ever really got into this impenetrable ball and I think if they're anywhere they're in there wow I saw a documentary once about this scientist that was

essentially risking his reputation trying to find a giant sloth somewhere maybe in the Amazon some somewhere probably Peruvian Amazon that's where I'm thinking too there's a photo I have on my Instagram of a whale that's on a wall in an old Italian church it was from like 2017 or 2018 I was in rll and there's this church that's it's so old the church is a thousand years old but it's built on top of another church and they don't even know how old that church is there's like a glass floor and you look down you see

the old church they don't they have no idea how old it is but they had a painting of like the whale from the from the Bible who is it job who was it Jonah Jonah Jonah that's right Jonah so look at this F this is this Ancient Ancient church but there's a photo of a whale that's in is it in that where's it's around the same time I know I put the photo on Instagram it that's the church but in that church this is the whale doesn't look nothing like a whale the whale looks like

a monster dragons so that's what it's like their drawings was like they came back and described those [ __ ] mercenaries couldn't draw so the guys who came back the savages the [ __ ] animals that were hacking off heads in the Congo one day he goes it's just going to be the right Wind and Fire is going to start in the right place and it's going to burn through La all the way to the ocean and there's not a [ __ ] thing we can do about it I go really he goes yeah we're

just we just get lucky he goes We Get Lucky with the wind he goes but if the wind hits the wrong way it's just going to burn straight through LA and there's not going to be a we could do about it cuz these fires are so big dude when you're talking about like thousands of Acres that are burning simultaneously with like 40 mph winds and the winds just blowing Embers through the air and those Embers are landing on roofs and those houses are going up and they're landing on bushes and those bushes are going up

and everything's dry and once it happens it happens in a way where it's so spread out that there's nothing that can do there's nothing that can you just have to evacuate right nothing nothing that can do you just got to get out of there that's [ __ ] horrible it burnt 40 I think 40 houses in my neighborhood Jesus Christ dude is crazy that's awful it's dry all it takes is a good wind and and fires but it it happened three times and army ants build a bridge to invade wasp nest yeah look at that

and see the see the eggs they're carrying the WASP eggs out of the nest oh my God what a bunch of creeps and everybody that commented was like there's a rope in the middle of that that's not real there's no rope no look you can can see right through it that's what's crazy is that it's just allt that is just bodies that is just ant bodies how are they doing that I don't know how did they swing imagine how [ __ ] strong the ants at the very top that are hanging onto the board holding

the hole holding a giant rope of ants all bunch of egg Ste you see right through it look at that it's unbelievable nuts it's really nuts what a crazy organism yeah it's and the fact that they're the biomass of ants I think the biomass of ants on Earth is equal to the biomass of humans oh really I thought it was actually more I thought there was more biomass of ants than there are of human beings wow is that true Buffalo are so dumb they just running if you shoot Buffalo one goes down and the other

ones look and they go right back to eating like you have to literally go out and yell at them to get them to move they had these areas that they would call Buffalo jumps yell at them these Buffalo like oh where do I go just off the cliff everybody there's a thousand fat [ __ ] behind you pushing you off the cliff imagine being the first Buffalo to get like really close he's like running up to the cliff he's like oh oh oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] he turn the dumbest [ __

] giant beast on Earth so they're just all over the place and they destroy the land they're so big there's so many of them and they're wild they even have wild domestic cows that grow out of control and the males become like super ferocious like you know like a bull like a bull doesn't want you riding them well they have a thing in Australia called scrub blls and what it is is a domestic cattle like domestic cattle but that went wild like Generations ago with dragons are probably giant crocodiles there you go and there's some

people that went to the Congo in the 1800s that said they saw crocodiles bigger than their boats 40ft boats and crocodiles were bigger than their boats about crocodiles is they don't they don't die they just stay alive until something kills them so they keep growing so if you got a crocodile it could be 300 400 years old and that would be like a 60ft crocodile and they might have seen those back they that old and that's when people had guns right so the people with the guns are probably killing all the ones that are really

big so those ones that are really big they've been eating other crocodiles they've eating everything they cannibalize each other they eat everything that moves so to get to that point is so hard that when you whack those dudes the ones that are left are like 30 years old 50 years old like you'll probably have smaller crocodiles it kind of makes sense that's probably what dragons were probably were a bunch of people that never experienced crocodiles before and just got [ __ ] up by these 20 foot Crocs have you ever been around a Belgium malam

those are the dogs that they use in war and police dogs and they're [ __ ] scary little meat missiles and they look at you like this yeah they're always thinking and you can't just keep one of those [ __ ] in your yard they're too smart they're working dogs first of all they climb fences like a chimpan they just go right up the fence and over it they can do [ __ ] where they leap through the air like you can't [ __ ] believe they really can jump that high right I'm talking like

12 ft in the air they they run jump off a guy's back and then leap through the air like climb over walls that are like 10 ft tall just by running up the wall yeah it's it's it's insane pretty wild that's that's a wolf it's a same it is wild but these dogs in particular are bred they're so intelligent but that's closer to a wolf yeah look at him running up the [ __ ] wall he's he's basically a monkey got it figured out and then he's hanging on it it's crazy they are planning on

starting with I think a 100 mammoths and putting them in this place called Pine not pin Park uh something like that this park in Siberia um that they've been doing this experiment on as to what happens when you add meapa back into the Arctic tundra to offset carbon emissions wow and so they're using what DNA they're using elephant DNA and mixing it with something else they're taking Indian elephants and they're using crisper technology and they're using existing Mammoth DNA and they're making an embryo and then they're implanting it into the Indian elephant and 22 months

later in Indian elephant's gestation period She will give birth to a mammoth physically and morphologically identical to a mammoth but has used all of the DNA from the closest living relatives in order to get there a real Mammoth a real Mammoth first woolly mammoth will be launched 2024 what yeah next year next year end of next year oh my God I live for 2 weeks uh in the bottom of the sea oh Jesus the scariest thing I saw one night I was taking a dump the way you do this if you have to go number

two you go into the pool and there's a what we call a gazebo which is just a little Dome that has air inside and then you just go down and you have to swim I don't know it's like maybe 10 15 ft it's not that far like with no tank no and you're 60 ft down it's night you can't see a thing you're alone in the ocean and then you hold on and you just take off your Trunks and you just let it rip and then you finish you put your mask back on and I

took a big breath and I went down and I open my eyes and my mask in the darkness with my flashlight and I saw like right in front of me this huge eyeball the size of a saucer this big staring unblinking right at me and I freaked out I just tore off for the pool and the habitat I jumped in there I surfaced I'm screaming and my crew come running like I've been bit by a shark or something what was it it was a goliath grouper oh I've seen those things before they're enormous size of

a cow oh my God oh my God we we had gone deeper down the Amazon Rabbit Hole than like anyone had ever gone we found this place place the floating Forest where you're walking on on rafts of floating grass and you're walking past Treetops so there's a forest underneath the lake but you're walking on the surface of it and the anacondas love it and we see two anacondas one of them is so big that I would say was probably 24 25 ft gigantic that was an 18-footer then there was like another like a 16 footer

on it and my first response was we have to catch this snake and so I jumped on it I just didn't think about it I just jumped on the snake oh my God and and so the snake and you know I always say like you know pick or it didn't happen but this was the middle of the night I jumped on the snake and as I'm holding it the one measurement I have is that I was holding on to the snake and my fingers couldn't touch that's how that's how big this thing was and so

it D what it dragged me to the edge of the grass what that big oh my God there's a there's a group of people that say that Dragons Were Real and I'll explain so around the same time periods in you know China South America Africa all these different Rome all these places images depicted people fighting dragons right and every every Dragon was slightly different but it was all a giant scaly animal that could fly the group that says this basically they're they're saying the evidence is the reason there's no fossil of dragons is because they

had bird bones and they were actually very delicate animals but a handful of these small more small a small population of these giant flying lizards existed and basically encompassed all these different countries where they all depicted fighting dragons in their own way and they were all killed off by you know Knights or whatever it is and then didn't fossilize the science is saying that if there were lizards big enough to fly around and eat people they didn't have bones that could fossilize and that's why you know that's why all these human populations around the world

have depictions of them because they did actually exist have you ever seen these uh these Great Pyrenees dogs that they run with the Sheep yes yeah they're they're they're well they're cool in a much different way they basically think they're sheep so sheep in the wilderness are one of the few animals that are still guarded by humans you I've heard mixed things about these dogs ability to to deal with Wolves you know and and it has to do with the fact that wol there's more than you know there's a group of wolves so if they

can draw one of these dogs off you know they wolves can wolves can kill them I know that some people in Wolf country what they'll do is on the Great Pyrenees they'll put they'll put spike collars on them so the you know the Wolves can't get a hold of them cuz these dogs are big like they're a lot bigger than a wol than most wolves how big are these dogs these these Great Pyrenees dogs where they we about yeah 150 160 that's what I was thinking I that's a big dog yeah you know um but

I don't know how well they'll do with the wolves and man there stories of wolves getting into these domestic sheep and killing like hundred if you had to be eaten by any animal what would it be oh the bigger the better over quick uh no not shark I don't like that because I don't like my head being here and the evils under here like just there's this thing that I follow about sharks on Instagram this person found a tiger shark a 18f footer or some [ __ ] right she somehow gained this thing's confident it

had like a fish some fishing line and like took it out and then somehow she ran into the thing again in the ocean and she was petting it like a [ __ ] lap dog trying to suggest that this thing knew her knew her and was happy and respect I mean the way they cut it together and of course the music always takes you emotionally where they want you to go but I was just watching that whole thing going like it's good that you did that but I don't think you're at the I can now

this tiger shark has talked to all the other sh no no no Bill's cool if you're seeing a chimpanzee a lion tiger or bear in a cage they were they had to um they got to be on fentanyl they on all these drugs uh Natasha Daly wrote a really amazing they're on fenel oh yeah the ones in Thailand put chimps on fenel oh they put them in cages like this so that they don't grow any muscle and any chimp like Michael Jackson's chimps there were three of each cuz after a year you can't hold a

chimp in a tuxedo it's going to rip your face off right just beat your ass yeah so after about a year they send it off to experiments there's one actually in a zoo in armadilla Texas one of the chubs I know where all Michael Jackson's [ __ ] animals you know where all of Michael Jackson all them I mean a lot of them were sold for experiments elephants are kind of spread out yeah one of them they were sold for experiments The Chimps were CU lipstick what kind of experiments I mean chimp experiments Space Odyssey

sequel living in the Michael Jackson Neverland Castle to getting experiments done on you and you don't understand English and you're like what is happening like I thought I had the life the [ __ ] life now I'm strapped in and they're