Marvin when's the pizza getting here I just ordered it it should be here any minute hey Daddy want you hear a joke no sure Jeffy what does a gay horse eat what hey what was the final score to the Ethiopian basketball game what eight nothing I don't get it that must be the pizza I'll go get it hello hey there I got you mushroom pizza we were all out of mushrooms at the store but I had a Ziploc bag full of them in my car so I put those on there it'll make you night better
how much do I owe you 60 bucks 60 for one pizza yeah I mean it's $10 for the pizza and then another 50 for the shrooms cuz they're not cheap I don't want the shrooms take them off well okay how about this how about I come in and I eat it with you and then you don't owe me anything won't you lose your pizza job look I don't even like being a pizza man okay come on let's hang out bro pizza's here o it smells yummy oh look at all those mushrooms you guys are going
to be tripping balls anyway you guys watching the game I didn't know there was a game on tonight yeah man Monday night football Cowboys versus Chargers well then turn it on okay yeah I'm actually supposed to be at that game I wanted to get my helmet signed by CD lamb that's actually a person's name not just an outdated video format my favorite animal and Brandon Cooks which is actually not a cooking show hosted by a guy named Brandon I didn't know you were a Dallas Cowboys fan well I'm not but my grandma is yeah I
wanted to get it signed for her I actually had four tickets on my phone to go see the game but no one wanted to go with me wait a minute 1 2 3 4 you guys want to come to Texas and see the game with me it's about to start there's no way we're going to make it oh look it's only a 10-hour drive and we can make it as long as the game goes into 15 overtimes or a player dies temporarily on the field come on come on Marvin let's go Texas would be fun
well you'd have to speed the whole way listen I drive like an [ __ ] I can do it and and I'm a cop so no one's going to pull me over okay guys let's go wait hold on I don't want to go on an empty stomach so let's eat this pizza first everybody grab a slice I'm so scared right now I'm seeing things no no no no don't be scared bro that's just the shrooms my man come on this journey With Me Marvin I want to put a baby in the microwave okay do it
do it I think that'll help wait a minute if I keep looking to the side I think I could look inside my head and see my brain oh what's in there wo daddy do you see this [ __ ] monkey wo wo I see it I see it I'm going to pet Ito let let me see your hand i'm a doctor oh dude your hand is [ __ ] gone man it's gone there's no hand there it's gone it's gone it's gone bro wait wait what is that what is that noise W wo wo wait
are you wearing a wire are you no let me see under your shirt believe you is your wire D it's inside your skin you need to cut it open give me a knife give me a knife I'll cut myself open wait aren't we supposed to go somewhere oh yeah let's go let's go to Texas okay Texas shotgun I want to sit up front okay everybody sobered up yeah I'm never eating mushroom pizza ever again yeah well it's not for everybody okay so I put Dallas into my car's GPS and it says it's 692 M away
and we'll be there at 11:53 in the morning now we have to get there in an hour so I'm going to drive like crazy okay so everybody buckle up all right let's go you know guys we've been driving for a while you want to play Ice buy or something it's dark outside yeah you're right that was a kind of dumb idea ice buy something yellow the lines in the road yeah oh no guys my Hyundai Sonata says it's almost out of gas what what is there any gas stations nearby no nowhere well where are we
I don't know we're in the middle of Texas what can we do I I don't know I hold on let me pull over in this dirt road over here o maybe someone in that scary house can give us gas what if there's a serial killer in there this isn't a scary movie Marvin serial killers don't really exist guys I don't think this is such a good idea well everyone please stop being chicken shits we need gas and there are no gas stations within 100 miles this is our last chance to get gas so we can
make it to that game wait somebody check the score it's 77 in the second quarter oh [ __ ] we really got to hurry up if we want to get there before overtime how do you know it's going to go to overtime it will I want to stay in the car okay princess crybaby you can stay in the car Marvin Jeffy us men can go knock on the door oh Marvin I hate to do this I'm going to be respectful in case of sleeping so I'm not going to ring the doorbell I'm just going to
knock quietly hey hey we're trying to make it to the Cowboys game open up open up I know you're in there oh Marvin I think we woke him up look at that bed head oh look at the chainsaw he must have thought we were Intruders hey there scary man I'm really sorry I woke you up but uh you see that Hyundai Sonata over there yeah the one in stormy sea blue yeah it's mine paid off and everything yeah it's got a backup camera it's got heated seats the works it's really nice now I'm not looking
to sell but if you make me an offer I can't refuse you could take it off my hands Marvin I don't think he wants to buy my car don't ask for gas oh the gas right right yeah so we were driving through Texas trying to make it to the Cowboys game and judging by that American flag next to your door I'm assuming you're familiar with America's team but our car ran out of gas so if you can give us just like a gallon or two we can make it to the next creepy [ __ ]
house oh Marvin I think he wants us to follow him okay uh hey man do you have something I can drink I'm pretty thirsty he does not brush his teeth man I really hope he's not one of those people that gives you tap water and then he's got a fridge full of soda those people are [ __ ] oh what's that that Hawaiian Punch M Marvin that's a cup of blood blood yep I'm just going to put that right down oh look at that that's a human hand oh Marvin we interrupted his dinner how rude
of us yeah I think we should be going now oh oh no no thank you we already ate mushrooms we're good oh have no Jeffy you're not going to eat a hand okay okay we can knock that off yeah yeah yeah guys stop we should get out of here I know Marvin I'm just trying not to piss him off because he has a face on his face Hey listen I would love to eat that hand but I actually don't like my hand cold so could you just put that in the microwave for me holy [
__ ] that that is that is the other hand and the whole arm okay yeah yeah you can just put that in the microwave and we're going to get the [ __ ] out of here run to the car no he'll be expecting that let's go to that creepy shed over there they might have gas door close the door close the door okay I think we're safe oh Marvin he's crying now I feel bad should we open the door no look for gasoline yeah you're right oh cheer up buddy we'll be out in a minute
oh okay yeah yeah yeah it's okay buddy uh daddy there's more food over here what are you talking about oh my God what the [ __ ] oh my God no no no no this is not good guys it's already halftime we really need to get moving look at this oh sweet Jesus he killed his grandmother and ate her eye out with a spoon oh God that is so metal oh look at this leg oh yeah yeah this guy is a psychopath he is eating good tonight this is Applebees for him look we have to
get out of here before he eats us I think we're probably fine I mean he has enough food to feed a whole village no look at this look there's a bucket of Bones down there we got to get out here so look for gasoline yeah we really do need to hurry up but it is only 10 to 7 so it could still go to overtime come on look for gas okay Marvin look a gas can that could get us halfway down the street okay then go put it in the car so we can leave it
looks like he was working on this truck huh I guess our boy's a mechanic he's not as stupid as he looks if we were having engine trouble he could have helped us oh my God guys hi okay Marvin I like our hiding spot under the truck it's awesome it's very comfortable down here reminds me of being a little kid playing hide-and seek of course back then if I got caught I didn't get murdered grandma oh he just realized what he did that's sad oh never mind he thinks he's at chili eating baby back ribs oh
no he's coming this way shut the [ __ ] up Orin you're the one doing all the talking shut up don't don't he put the chainsaw down oh he's having a snack while he works on his truck boom who the [ __ ] gave this guy a dri license oh look his shoes are untied try to tie him so that when he runs after us he trips and falls yeah it's a great idea Marvin the only problem is I I don't have legs I've never had to tie shoes before Oh [ __ ] he dropped
his [Music] snack thank God Marvin I really thought he saw us oh wait where's he going oh oh looks like he's going to play his claw machine cookie big cookie 25 50 come up here cookie oh no Marvin he's trying to win Jeffy in the claw machine [ __ ] [ __ ] I hope he keeps losing come on baby come on baby come [Music] on oh yeah oh yeah I got it this time [ __ ] [ __ ] grandma [ __ ] there it is this is it I'm going to get you Cookie
I'm going to get you this is it this is it right here oh [ __ ] oh [ __ ] this is ried this is grand how many goddamn quarters does this man have get you I'm going to get you those are my last two quarters [ __ ] [ __ ] no [ __ ] I'm get you no give me a wait while he's playing the claw machine why don't we grab his chainsaw and hit him with it good idea Marvin oh come on I got have two more quarters somewhere two more quarters one
two come on thank you Grandma come here come here big cookie I'm coming I'm coming oh my God I got it big cookie you're all mine yes come here come here [ __ ] [ __ ] son of no come here [ __ ] [ __ ] Grand [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] Grand [ __ ] okay kill him with the chainsaw but Marvin he's crying and he just punted his dead grandmother's head like 60 yards he could have been in the NFL but we have to save Jeffy but I don't
have any more quarters just open the door to the machine and get him out oh okay I guess I could try that Gra grab gra grab come on I'm going get the gas can hurry up and pop the gas drink up Frank Sinatra I named my car Frank Sinatra you know like Frank Sonata because I drive a Hyundai Sonata in stormy sea blue heated seats paid off cookie cookie cookie missing someone took cookie [ __ ] [ __ ] oh no oh no he's coming run now hold on I got to get every drop have
you seen gas prices these days come on come on come on come on come on I can hear a little bit more in there drink up oh he's getting real close he's getting real close okay screw this drive off drive off wait no I have to pee can I use this guy's bathroom no I'm getting the hell out of here but first oh man guys there's only 2 minutes left unless the Chargers get a field goal there's no way it's going into overtime but they do have the ball oh back up put it in reverse
put it in reverse no I thought I was going to drive forward right into his house of course I'm going to put it in reverse I'm not stupid see that backup camera I love this car so much that's so useful go go go go it's doing Collision detection cuz he's in the way go okay fine good thing we got away from that [ __ ] all right now let's get to the game hold on let me check the score oh no guys the game ended the Cowboys won 20 to 17 wait it says the game
was in Los Angeles not Dallas wait so you're telling me we drove to Texas for no [ __ ] reason yeah that says the game was at the Chargers damn it okay fine let's turn around Jesus Christ sorry about that guys you would think I would know where the game was because I'm the one who bought the tickets but no well I mean they play in Dallas next week if you want to see that no okay damn could have just said no thank you there's someone at the door can you get it it's not my
house but we could go together that could be fun you know like friends hello wait hold on how the hell did you get here vro vro oh he fixed up his truck do you have any quars oh he just wants quars yeah hold on I'll get my wallet yay [Music]
