Warzone Moments that can only go wrong

i'm descending in my helicopter [Music] matt give us a good old moby huge slap real quick i got to close my door one two right [ __ ] yeah you gotta close this game and chrissy made noise i gotta play it again slap the dick slide the dick again please is this good nope it's not chrissy shut up man i need another dick slap he's just gonna talk on purpose now no i would never do that what the [ __ ] is rebirth reinforced uh oh there's a new rebirth yeah it's a new one no

let's hear it when when when when when when was there a [ __ ] gnome at the end of that did you hear him slap it and then go whoa my hand hurts i'm slapping my [ __ ] so hard tell me about it been there for context chat matt has a giant penis whatsoever he's got a giant he's got a giant phallic object in his room you got to play bongos on your [ __ ] now all right [Music] bro that sounds like me smacking my stomach it's got my meat i'm ready do not

hit it with a rhythm bro don't stop pov you walk in on your parents matt go ahead do the sound what do you want you want like uh all right i'm going to bed prank them john bring him john you already know where are you uh in the drive-through okay what would you like um lobster bisque we don't have that uh do you have lobsters yes do you have biscuits oh okay i'll just take a raw lobster please we have bats well i'm okay nothing but bats batman working at a batting kit that is a

[ __ ] [ __ ] let's go nothing like a dick dick genies i got dick jeans i got my dick stuck to my jeans please call the authorities my dick snuck my genies my jeans smell like dick this just sounds like the snl writers room like we're just literally oh wait hold on i press c i press c i press c please okay we're good i'm descending in my helicopter bro what the [ __ ] am i shooting uh i told you i got it oh oh that's a three-pointer if i've ever seen one

kill this guy he looks dumb he's getting he's crouched and he's gonna body no he's just sitting at a spawn red crate what the when that fight your trash is not gone go go go go go go go go get that [ __ ] oh my god just keep swimming just keep putting me head on holy [ __ ] puffer if you save up your money and work real hard i don't know if you should buy him back after that dude you sound like my drunk uncle who just walked in at 3am save your money

hey goodbye hey why are you complaining and saying that one huh yeah what do you mean that one 200 what's new not much just got back from south carolina learned me a few lessons there about history oh [ __ ] i don't think they're historically accurate why is it always his story and not her story of misogyny right here can't get over that sneeze to you guys i feel like i sneezed regular no if that's a regular sneeze my name is johnny sins now it might not be verbatim but it sounded like [Laughter] reaction youtubers

be like money money [Laughter] like me watching reaction youtubers be like i love the comments on reaction videos that say bro you talk too much just watch the video no this isn't good i want to steal it once he gets out oh oh [Applause] wait what i mean what wait oh there we go oh canada what the [ __ ] oh my god that's not the lyrics brizzy i'm tired of seeing old people weiner in the gym locker room i'm not i love it oh my god how am i alive what's up yes help i

got you buddy thank you you're oh you're not so bad they're just like oh no smitty stay there i'm gonna land in the helicopter okay i came back and got killed by a [ __ ] pistol somehow because the ground loot is dog [ __ ] skill issue you have a mental issue shut up skill issue i bet you can't even get an erection there's two teams oh my [ __ ] can go in and out no he's not one shot if you ever laugh like that again i will commit a felony on you it's

the clown from uh from my life i'm going back to fight those guys you want me to cluster strike you just tell me when yeah do it don't do it on the helicopter he said do it on the helicopter i heard him don't worry where did the building go i'm back in my tower whenever you feel this if you like join i'm gonna meet read the pacific monthly you could just be out there the whole time if you want okay look at that i'm here to drink beer and kiss you on the mouth come here

coming to the top of the cheeks boys coming let me clean up i'm here to eat a scorpion and die of malignant brain tumors what you doing i'm just running around looking at trees and [ __ ] and he's looking at other career options a little nature documentary oh look it's it's a bird it's called bird watching i got some dog balls sitting in my pocket dog balls hitting in my pocket i feel like he's confessing every time you don't have dog balls sitting in my pocket don't check i don't have [ __ ] any

dog pocket we have an apb for a guy going around stealing dog balls i have six or seven show me the written law i just down three edibles i went all the way downstairs and grabbed my water what is wrong with me what is wrong with him i'll be right back again he'll be right back crazy you hear it now yeah no i'm here i'm here no you're good i'll wait puffer wow first you're quite wait wait when you're waiting all right i'm going in the helicopter going to fly me around new york city not

good guys there's a guy to the left matt are you chasing come on he's chasing come here i need your dick he said [ __ ] this game bro i hope you die in a car accident is that game done no i can speed it up if you [ __ ] guy yeah speed it up speed run okay i'm gonna speed it up wait you come here matt please don't do this don't do so much to live for i'm gonna cry let's hear what's on your mind just wario cries oh [ __ ] bro you

almost made me take out my revolver my sick shooter with that don't do that who was the [ __ ] that made egg salad who said egg salad you decided to put eggs in a bowl and say egg salad who decided to salad with eggs egg salad back to the snow right in here salad god i'm not going with eggs with egg salad big bad hey we can write an egg valley let's do an egg right in the valley where the egg's at man looks like he's got it you do i got it i'll be

piling up i steer it off look at all the tangos take oh you're lucky you got buildings you little enemies man your ancestors would not be too happy about what you just said there i'll be violent no no you said you guys are lucky you got buildings grizzy what's 29 plus 36 divided by two yeah guys he's toasted the definitive way to figure out if anyone's high the obvious answer is 156. i don't know let's check the math on that editor both of you to assume editors [Laughter] don't look at your last paycheck by the

way it's completely accurate it's it's all right it's the agreement i swear you on me a weird word to say bro no i i maybe after three edibles here yeah nope that's just the drugsy [Music] you