people I think and you've written about this they've idealized your marriage they sit there and look at it but you have always been very clear out and very honest that marriage makes work it takes daily work and that it is not always glamorous and you have had some very unique strains but there's also the strains that any of us who are in a relationship or married face whether it be whose career goes first or who takes on the child care labor is there one piece of advice that you would give for people who are thinking
about how you put in that work for a partnership that's lasted about yeah it's not really one piece of advice it's to me it's a philosophy it's an Outlook um you know in in this age of we want everything now we want everything quick we you know when life is everything but that we have to understand that marriage is never 50 50. um and you know you sort of wonder how that idea kind of got out there um I have found that if you stick with it you know over the course of your entire relationship
you may have 50 50 over time but if I look over my marriage if I were to judge it in year five or year 10 there was never 50 50. somebody was always giving way more someone always needed a different kind of thing you have to evolve with it um and so yeah there were times when I felt like I was 70 percent in and he was doing 30 percent because of the choices that I made in the terms of how I wanted our family to look I had to take my foot off of my
career gas pedal never putting on the break but slowing up a little bit those are the natural compromises that are required and I feel bad when I see young people giving up on their relationships because there's there are periods of hard there are periods of discomfort so I think it's important for us to be honest in those conversations not to glamorize what a partnership feels like because then young people quit too soon they quit before or they've really you know played out the full scenario
