Do you exercise? Not much. I'm lazy.
What kind of exercise would you do if you were going to exercise? Do you run? Do you play golf?
Do you uh I can't run very well. I have tendency to black my eyes. But [applause] to kill him.
What do you think, Dolly? I think you should kill him. [laughter] I know the feeling.
My husband does the same thing. Or at least have him nut. Hollywood has a rule that many famous talk show hosts learn the hard way.
Never assume you'll be the one controlling the conversation when you're sitting across from Dolly Parton. All it takes is one seemingly harmless question and she'll steer the entire interview in a completely different direction with a punchline that leaves the audience in stitches while the host is left speechless. Well, not just through Beverly Hills.
This was uh one night a bunch of girlfriends and I were out to dinner. That's when Tom Jones was in the heat of his career and you know how sexy he is anyway, right? and he had this beautiful home in Beverly Hills and we had been to the restaurant near his house and I said, "I wonder what old Tom Jones would think if I just stre through his yard.
" You never did. I did. But the bad thing is part is that Dolly has never tried to be funny.
That's simply who she is. And by the end of this video, you'll understand why almost no one can keep up with Dolly Parton's refreshingly unfiltered sense of humor. Good for me ever since I started on your show.
And you said one time once I got to be real famous, I probably wouldn't come back on the show. But I always will. I'm here about as much as you are.
[laughter] Office someday that you should run for president. That's how much your fans believe in you. And is that something that you'd even be interested in to to run for office?
No. Don't you think we've had enough boobs in the White House? Excellent.
The first thing that makes Dolly different is that she never avoids questions about her appearance. While many celebrities try to dodge them or become defensive, Dolly is always the first to make herself the joke. She's so quick to laugh at herself that most hosts never even get the chance to deliver their own punchline before she's already topped it with something even funnier.
The girls, I pretty have pretty much have to for the girls. Like you said, I I have a joke though. I always say I'd probably been six feet tall if I hadn't got so bunched up at the top.
But what's your excuse? You'd have been what 12 feet tall. you cuz it's tiny little feet.
Tiny little waist. Well, I got little feet cuz nothing grows in the shade. Seem like they'd be heavy though.
Well, they are heavy. That's why I do so many Led Zeppelin songs. [laughter] The balloons getting heavy.
Hey, you're allowed to do those jokes. They are heavy. But to be honest, if they get too heavy, I got some bongo stand.
I just go right to And once the conversation turns to her looks, Dolly rarely stops there. She'll launch into wildly exaggerated stories that leave everyone wondering where the truth ends and the joke begins. Her perfectly straight delivery keeps the entire studio caught between disbelief and uncontrollable malfunction with you because Oh, I said because I'd probably take out the first three rows.
[laughter] But I [cheering] can tell you this, if there is the malfunction, you will not see a nipple ring. It'll be more like a hula hoop. [laughter] For years, many people assumed Dolly's glamorous image was simply a way to attract attention.
But the more you listen to her, the more you realize it was all intentional from the very beginning. Dolly has always known exactly who she is, how she wants people to remember her, and she's never allowed anyone else to define that for her. No, it's a it's certainly a choice.
I don't like to be like everybody else. I've often made this statement that I would never stoop so low as to be fashionable. That's the easiest thing in the world to do.
But I just chose to do this and it's a show business is a money-making joke and I've just always liked telling jokes. Oh my god. But do you ever feel that you're a joke that people make fun of you?
Oh, I know they make fun of me, but actually all these years people, you know, has has thought the joke was on me, but it's actually been on the public. I know exactly what I'm doing and I can change it. Well, a clown.
Well, I actually patterned my look after what they called the town in my hometown when I was a little girl. This woman that used to walk the streets, had all this makeup and hair, high heel shoes, and I thought she was so beautiful. And everybody used to say, "Oh, she ain't nothing but trash.
" And I used to say, "Well, that's what I'm going to be when I grow up, trash. " That's why she's followed one simple rule throughout her entire career. No matter where she appears, what situation she's in, or even during the most awkward moments, Dolly always stays true to the image she's chosen for herself.
To her confidence doesn't come from being perfect. It comes from never being afraid to be yourself. Lot of time in California and you know, they're always prone to have earthquakes.
I never take my makeup off at night. I always like keeps it cuz I thought if I have to run out in the streets, you have to grab a wig and make sure I have to look good cuz you know there's going to be candles everywhere. And I said, I never go out.
I said, the only way would be I'd go out without makeup and my hair done up a little bit is if my husband, you know, had a heart attack or something and I'd have to really think about that. [laughter] I'm joking. Not if I can help it.
It's like I'm very funny. Even like at night if I'm in hotel rooms, I'm always afraid. Well, if I'm on a very high floor and if there's a fire, I always try to like not clean everything.
I'll try to clean my skin, but I'll leave my eye makeup on a little bit. I think now if I got to get out of here in a hurry like an earthquake. Like an earthquake.
That too. I think that if I had all my makeup off and looked as bad as I can look and the building was burning down, I'd just go down with it before I get out looking like [applause] brimstone. And he thought I was Jezebel.
They thought I was going to hell in a hand basket. You know, they thought I was running around with the boys. And I thought, "No, ain't no way I'm sleeping with no boys cuz I don't want nobody to mess up my makeup.
" smear my [applause] lipstick. And of course, I looked cheaper then than I even do now. [laughter] But anyway, and Judy didn't look any better.
So, we checked in this hotel and they thought we were hookers. [laughter] So, we went out looking around in the city. Perhaps that confidence was born from a childhood that was anything but easy.
Growing up in a large, poor family, Dolly had every reason to tell a heartbreaking story. Instead, she turned those memories into hilarious anecdotes that make people laugh while feeling for her at the same time. That means everybody works.
We all worked because you have to. I think that's why people in the country have so many kids. You don't want to hire help.
So, [laughter] easier to breed your own, I guess, huh? Would you like to have 12 kids on? I don't know.
I'll talk about it later. Okay. [laughter] No, I didn't mean they're not involved.
No, this wasn't an offer to go to stud. This was just [laughter] in the mountain. Your hair is very blonde and you got a lot of very big.
Yeah. Well, I tell you what, working in the fields like we used to, we used to bail a lot of hay, so I saved a few bales to use for hair after. A lot to be said for getting out in the field.
That's great. They just That's just a way of life in the country. Go ahead.
I was just going to say mama, she could get pregnant just having daddy explain the advantages of the pill to her. [laughter] Also shaped the unique woman she would become. Dolly has never been embarrassed by where she came from.
In fact, she speaks about her hometown with enormous pride. Whenever someone tries to tease her for being a country girl, she always has the perfect comeback one that leaves everyone laughing, including the person who started the joke. Called you a hillbilly.
If you had have, it would have been something very natural, but I would have probably kicked your shins or something, [laughter] you know, forever. Yeah, that was one of the greatest compliments that I've had paid to me. And you might know they picked the flattest stretch of ground ever.
No curves, no heels, straight straight away. That outlook on life is reflected in her decades long marriage as well. Instead of giving the romantic answers people expect, Dolly describes her husband using the most unexpected comparisons and amusing statistics imaginable.
Ironically, it's that playful humor that helps explain why their relationship has remained so strong for so many years. How do you know? Well, I need freedom.
The man gives me freedom. So, why get married? Well, why not?
I mean, if what you want most is freedom, why have a husband away someplace to see six weeks a year? He doesn't go on the road with you much. Well, how many in 365 days a year?
How often do you see Carl? Well, we've been married 48 years. We've been together about three of that.
Three? Not really. Actually, I'm home a lot.
Have you Jennifer Anderson for a while? You know, I love her to death. My husband is crazy about her.
Oh, really? Yes. And he was more excited that I was going to do a movie with her.
I got the chance to write all this music. I think he kind of fantasizes like a threesome with [cheering] Hey, good to Of course, fame inevitably brings rumors, but rather than holding press conferences or arguing with the media, Dolly almost always chooses to make the rumors themselves seem ridiculous. Just a few witty remarks from her are often enough to completely change the direction of the story.
Bert Reynolds. Any truth? Oh, no.
We were No, Bert and I were too much alike. You know, he doesn't wear lipstick. No, but he we both wore high heels.
He always lifts and his shoes. We at that time we both had a roll around the middle and he wears a toupe and I wear a wig. So, I said I said I don't want to fight with him over who's fighting over the wig glue and over the high CMA show this year.
They didn't nominate me in any of the categories because I think they thought I would be in jail and I wouldn't make the show. No, but honestly on the CMA they asked me to make mention of the show and I will be performing and a guest on there. But I'm not going to go to jail.
I hope I don't Google myself because I pretty [music] much know what I'm up to. And if I don't know, all I got to do is pick up a National Inquir magazine. She's also remarkably open when it comes to money and knowing her own worth.
Dolly never pretends to be overly modest or shies away from uncomfortable topics. Instead, she talks about them with her trademark wit and honesty. Strangely enough, the more practical and straightforward she is, the more audiences seem to love her.
Ollie, that's her song. [cheering and applause] Yes, but she made it so much more. I always told her, you know, people say that's Whitney song.
I said that's okay. She can have the credit as long as I get the cash. [laughter] I'm not going to about Whitney making me $6 million.
At this point, you might think only inexperienced hosts get caught off guard by Dolly. In reality, even the most seasoned interviewers have found themselves struggling to keep up with her lightning fast comebacks. They begin the interview expecting to lead the conversation only to end up chasing after Dolly's jokes instead.
I'm not going to get time to talk to you. Not going to get any time to talk to you. Please.
I got Well, this is true story. up in Pigeon Forge. And I know you asked me why they call it Pigeon Forge.
I told you that's because it's where Pigeon's Forge at the Pigeon River now. There you go. Yeah.
Thank you. But seriously, in Pigeon Forge many years ago, back when I was a kid, they had a bear in a cage. You know, we're famous for the bears and the Smokies.
And they had a bear in a big cage up there and people would stop at this market and they would buy Cokes for this bear. It was in the cage. tourists would take pictures cuz Gatlinburg, that whole area for years.
They would put Cokes and peanuts in the Coca-Cola cans or whatever the bottled Cokes were then. So anyway, this bear was just getting bigger and bigger. But they were doing that and they were just selling all kinds of stuff at this market and this poor bear was just drinking them all.
And one day some redneck, they put gasoline in a Coke can. Can you believe how bad people are? And the poor thing just went crazy and it broke out of the pin and it started toward Sevirville because Pigeon Ford's about 8 milesi from Sevirville and it just ran all the way down, you know, and it was just going down there and then you know all of a sudden it just fell over.
Oh no. Dead. No, it was out of gas.
[music] I love you. You sure you just can't stay for a little bit? No, I can't stay.
Another reason audiences adore Dolly is he has quirky habits, embarrassing stories, and awkward life experiences that she's more than happy to share with the public. That openness makes the distance between a global [music] superstar and her fans almost disappear. And I thought, well, I need to I'm going to go in my purse and this guy wouldn't leave me alone cuz he was just sure I was playing hard to get and that I was really after it, right?
Definitely was after it. So, I didn't know how to get him off me. So I just said I just pulled my gun out and I just said, "If you touch me one more time, I'm going to shoot you.
" And so he backed off all the time, especially down on Santa Monica in LA. One year I thought, "Well, this would be a great night for me to get out and not be noticed because there's so many look alike, so many Dolly Partons walking around. I can just go out.
" Yeah. Seriously, I went into this club and I had kind of overexaggerated my own self, you know, made my beauty mark bigger, my eyes, bigger and the hair a little more. and I got down there and they were having a Dolly Parton lookalike contest and it was mostly drag queens and so I went in and I got in line with everybody else but somebody else won.
[laughter] Perhaps Dolly's greatest gift is her ability to find humor in the very things most people try to hide. Her age, her weight, the pressures of fame, even criticism from others. Nothing is off limits when it comes to material for a joke.
Instead of letting life laugh at her, Dolly always laughs first. It's tough to go out well too much. I always say that I weighed 120.
I'm just saying now that I've lost the plenty. Yeah, I have one of the smallest waist I've ever seen. Well, I don't know if it's my waist a little.
It's just my just in contrast. I Yeah, maybe. I sympathize with anybody with weight problem for any reason.
Remember, I used to tell you when I tried to haul ass, I had to make two trips. [laughter] Maybe you should just tell him ass. Exude confidence in everything that you do.
Do you always feel that way? Well, I'm confident in myself. I often say I'm comfortable in my own skin no matter how far I've stretched it [laughter] as the years go by.
Just because I was proud, not being conceited, but I went on and on about it a little too much. And my dad said, I said, "Dad, don't you think that's great? " He said, "Yes, I do.
I am very, very proud of you. " He said, "Because I know that to your fans, you may be some sort of an idol, but to the pigeons, you're just another outouse. " [laughter] And that's exactly why she's become almost impossible to replace in Hollywood.
Dolly has never claimed to be perfect, but she's also never let anyone else define her value. Behind the glamorous appearance is a remarkably sharp mind that knows exactly when to be serious and exactly [music] when a single oneliner is enough to bring an entire room to life. My assistant asked me something, and I'm going to blame it on her because I wouldn't have had the nerve otherwise.
Is it all you? Well, I can't show you here right on television. I get asked that question.
I always answer that by because people are in awe of the whole thing. You know, a lot of people say I have. A lot of people say I haven't.
I always say that if I hadn't have had it on my own, I'm just the kind of person that would have had me as a maid if I hadn't a soprano. You mean mafia? No.
But if you're talking about my voice, I would say I'm a soprano. That Molly's greatest appeal has never been limited to her music or her iconic appearance. What truly makes millions of people love her [music] is the way she turns everyday conversations from food and work to surprisingly deep life lessons into something light-hearted through her extraordinary sense of humor.
By the end of every interview, people remember more than just Dolly's jokes. They remember the feeling that life somehow seems a little simpler afterward. Favorite food?
Well, that's easy. Potatoes. Every diet I've ever fell off of has been because of a potato.
either French fries or mashed potatoes or baked potatoes. Potato potato potato. I never met a spud.
You make a joke. I said I've got at least 3,000 songs and three good ones. They're Mike.
So you talk to the left. What is your pre-show ritual? Well, I I uh pray and pee in that order.
Love that. Me too. Me too.
On that note, yeah, I saw you in my bare feet. And your bare feet. That's the only time you'll ever catch me out of my high heel.
That's right. Out of your high. That's your bare feet.
That's the only time I like politicians, but I think of myself as a diplomat. If that's the kind of people that tell you to go to hell in such a way you look forward to the trip. [laughter] Many celebrities earn admiration because of their talent.
Dolly Parton has accomplished something even more difficult. She makes every person who talks to her completely unable to predict what she'll say next. That rare combination of intelligence, authenticity, and effortless humor has made her one of Hollywood's most captivating personalities for decades.
If you enjoy Dolly Parton's completely unpredictable [music] wit as much as we do, be sure to subscribe to the channel and let us know in the comments which moment made you laugh the hardest.
