you look at other people you see the good qualities in them when you look at other people you can admire them and you feel mesmerized by them but when you look at yourself you don't have those feelings why is that why is it that you can give out all those emotions to everyone except for yourself why is it that you can make someone else feel secure about themselves but you can't when it comes to you listen I am here right now to fix this and literally after this video you will be a step closer to
becoming more confident hi guys my name is Liz and welcome back to my channel okay let's get right into it first things first in order for you to become more confident you have to get to know yourself you have to study yourself and your behaviors and your emotions to a point that when someone comes up to you and tells you oh this is the way you are you can be like yes I am that way and I know why I am that way and I'm working on fixing that because no one can tell you who
you are when you know who you are when I started healing my traumas and I started this whole healing journey I became a lot more confident in myself because before I used to think like oh I'm just crazy like I'm a crazy person and then when I started healing my traumas then I realized oh wait a minute you're not crazy you're hurt and this happened and this is why you're acting that way and then I could heal that and then I could also not listen to when people said to me oh Liz you're just crazy
see for me as well it's very obvious when I see someone that doesn't know who they are and they're trying to fit anywhere and trying to adapt to that person and whatever they're doing they're very easily manipulated you can very easily manipulate people like that and you can spot them like this and when people want to take advantage of you they will see that in you so how do you study yourself you Journal okay now go to internet like go even to my Instagram account it's the wizard list I have Shadow work questions there you
click on them you go to Pinterest you look up Shadow work question journaling questions questions about myself you look all these questions up and then you answer them for yourself that way you will get to know yourself little by little more and more being that helped for me personally was therapy I went into therapy I talked to my therapist and she validated me in a lot of ways I've been gaslighted my whole life and thought that I was overreacting nothing was wrong with me I was just crazy until I started talking to my therapist and
then she told me no you are this way because this happened that this is how we can fix it and she literally made me feel sane if you don't know where to begin to find a therapist then you're lucky because this video is sponsored by Better Health regardless of the sponsorship I genuinely think better health is a good platform because it combines over 30 000 therapists on one online platform and they also give you the opportunity that if you get matched to the therapist and you don't like the therapist then you can just switch with
no additional charge this does not happen in real life and believe me I have gone through a lot of shitty in real life therapists that I used to get from my school imagine your area has limited options you don't know where to look maybe you don't even want to leave your house better help literally allows you to just look out of the comfort for your own home to get matched with a therapist that is the right fit for you so how you do this is you start off by filling out a questionnaire so better help
can understand your specific needs and wants and you get matched with your therapist in as little as a few days then you can start scheduling phone video or message based sessions they also provide you your own online Journal which I think is amazing and you can attend group sessions I'm really not saying this just because of the sponsorship I'm genuinely saying if you're trying to look for a therapist and you don't know where to begin look at Better Health and better help will also give you 10 off your first month at Better Health if you
visit the link down in the description below or betterhelp.com wizard list seeing how to get to know yourself is you literally have to ask yourself why am I feeling this way why do I have these issues why do I have these addictions see I am so tired of people just saying oh it's just mental health whatever it's just that way this is not normal this behavior is not normal like even if I think about myself right when I had my Ed where I would binge and then you know uh the food if I look back
at myself now even in my head imagining myself doing that my behavior was not normal but people will tell you oh no it's just a mental health issue whatever no no I was severely traumatized and I didn't know how to get my trauma out other than doing that had I known that this could be linked to trauma what I was doing and not just because I had an ed I would have gone into therapy much faster I think is read books about subjects that you want to know more about about yourself right so for example
me I had uh obviously the PTSD and Trauma so I read uh the book the body keeps the score guys this book was like what but these things were are actually like scientifically proven that can happen there is is research done on this it's like my brain is wired differently than non-abuse children I was like wait a minute like literally a whole door opened for me so educate yourself on yourself you're the best subject you will ever study you're the best investment you will ever make see people cannot take away your knowledge they can take
away anything from you they can make you feel this small they can make you feel stupid but what they cannot take away from you is what you know in your intelligence so work on that dedicated to something see confident people always have something that they're dedicated to whether it's a goal whether it's a hobby whatever it is you know if you don't have any dedication or any stability in life all your other uh things in life will also not be stable or you will also not be dedicated to other things in your life like for
example you don't have a dedication in your regular routine you'll probably also not have the dedication in your relationships and friendships because you don't even care about your own life why would you care to create a life with someone else obviously people like that will not be confident because what is there to be confident about why should you be confident literally if you're constantly not doing anything you don't have any goals you don't have anything that you want to do or even Hobbies you you'd like to engage in how should you be confident if you
even go out with a group of friends what will you talk about you have nothing to talk about that's why you need to find dedication in something so you can be dedicated to yourself so you can be dedicated to your family to your loved ones but be dedicated to something in your life and to yourself first surround yourself with people that you look up to I read this quote recently and it was about um if you want your ego stroked then you should hang out to people that look up to you but if you actually
want to learn something in life and evolve then you should hang out with people that you look up to there's one thing and I need you to understand this your friend group is you if all your friends around you are insecure you're gonna also be part of them and you're not going to be able to get out of that insecurity first thing you're sharing your energy with these people and you guys are exchanging energies constantly by hanging out with each other so their insecurities come to you they take your insecurities and it's just a cycle
like this but who breaks this cycle you know who breaks the cycle the person that actually starts to have friends that are confident and it may not feel good to you because you may be like oh my God no I feel so insecure around confident people but that is actually when you have to get uncomfortable because you have to look up to them and see and see and look at them and think what can I learn from this person why does this person love themselves so much it's not about looks I'm gonna tell you because
I have seen people drop that gorgeous Moses you're actually in fact I will say this the most beautiful people I know are the most insecure most insecure and then I have people that are not that socially beautiful but them the way they walk talk and act hottest people on earth I I like I'm literally I'm I find them more attractive than my physically beautiful friends because you know why as well there are rubs off on you their confidence rubs off on you so when they walk in somewhere and they feel good about something you automatically
start to feel good about yourself too go hang out with people that you can learn from I'm not saying ditch all of your insecure friends but start having other friends that you can look up to that you see like oh you know what yeah I want to learn from them I want to see why they feel that way and how I can feel that way another thing is start thinking more with your heart instead of your ego this way you will stop taking things so personal for example when I get his comments or negative comments
I say oh okay nice they're speaking from their perspective it's okay these people can have their opinion me not before maybe I would get offended but now I think like yeah but they're seeing it from their perspective how can I be offended at that when you start thinking more with your heart and you start to see people as damaged Souls as damaged adults that need to heal their inner child then you actually start to be very compassionate and you become like a lot a lot less like taking things personally you don't really do that anymore
see everything in life that happens is your perception of it you're watching this video right now with your perception of me I can say the same sentence now it will be perceived differently by 10 people that watch this if they are listening with their perspective what their parents taught them what their culture taught them that's how they are listening and my responsibility is to know that it's not my job to fix them it's not my job to heal them uh it's just my job to share my truth and whoever is willing to listen will and
whoever is willing to doubt me they will what does it matter at the end of the day another thing is stop trying to be someone else the issue is when you try to be someone else you will always be the Lesser version of them they are already someone and you're trying to be them but why are you not unique why do you think that you're not special why do you think that you have to be like them I mean you can get inspiration from people but to blatantly copy them and like want to completely look
like them try to behave like them talk like and walk like them this goes back to the first thing where I said you have to know who you are because otherwise you will behave like this you will try to be someone else when you try to be someone else it will maybe you will succeed at really trying to trying your best to look like them but at the end of the day it will make you more insecure because at the end of the day what you're telling yourself is you are not good enough and that's
why we have to try to be like them because they are good enough and you're not so it's really sad if you're doing that to yourself kill the part in you that feels embarrassed don't feel embarrassed kill the part in you that feels embarrassed why are you embarrassed of what of who to do what I literally stopped that whole thing of like feeling embarrassed or whatever or like even like oh I know I can't post that because that's embarrassing embarrassing to who who am I embarrassed stuff people no why should I be embarrassed with you
guys the end of the day I am much more stronger than anyone else because I can stand in front of the camera in front of millions of people and talk about my vulnerabilities now I want the people that are judging me to do the same talk about your abuse talk about your traumas go stand in front of millions of people and let's see how people react and how you will deal with the Judgment you have to be incredibly strong to stand in my position I refuse to feel embarrassed I will not be embarrassed not of
people not of anyone I'm not embarrassed I'm happy to be who I am and I think that everything I'm doing is a great thing another thing is speak up for yourself this is something that I have learned to do more and more and I think I'm quite good at it when I don't like something or I didn't like the food or I just didn't like something and people ask me did you like it I will say no I did not like it I'm not really about it I'm just being honest I did not like it
and then you said oh okay is there something else we can do next time I have a bad service for my nails or hair or whatever and they asked did you like it I said no I didn't like it and then they say okay how can we help you then like how can we fix this then I say okay let's do this this and we can resolve it like this I used to be the person I was such a people pleaser that even if they cut my hair imagine I say I want to trim right
they cut it till here I will go cry in the mirror and say oh it's nice and then I'll go home crying more you know like it and from but for me now it's like no I'm paying for a service I want a nice service I'm not really a difficult client but if I really don't like something or it was not what I asked or even the food was really not nice I will say it it was not nice I would still pay for it and it was not good but that's it so start speaking
up for yourself this even shows like imagine your um your inner child right when you grew up you could never speak up for yourself and now you're the adult that speaks up for yourself imagine how proud that would make your inner child imagine your life that it's okay to say no like no I don't want to do it no I don't want to come no no I I can't make it no I don't want to do it that with you no I don't want to go there I also had like a lot of people ask
me like oh can you promote this blah blah I said no I can't I I don't do that you will realize people really don't get offended by you saying no they just move on with their life and they forget about it so don't think it's a big deal it's okay to know to whatever you feel like you don't want to do don't be afraid to take up too much space see there's not such thing as you are taking up too much space or you are too much you're not too much everyone around you is just
not good enough and they're not matching your Vibe see for example with me when I used to go out and stuff I would always like not wear makeup or not try to wear makeup because I didn't want to look like I was trying too hard but why would I not try like why would I not do that why do I not want to look cute or look good you know because I was just afraid of the attention and all these things but why not I would also look at myself it's if I saw myself walking
in a room I would look at myself I would think whoa she's so gorgeous stop like dimming your own lights to make others feel better because at the end of the day they it's not that they will feel better it's just that they see you as less okay it's not that you're doing them a favor they just don't care about you another thing is admit when you're wrong and be willing to learn see these days people are just like oh no I'm so right like I know everything we don't know anything like we literally as
humans we don't know anything I was watching this interview I don't remember from who it was um but this guy basically said that if we would use our body the same way we use our brain we would only be able to lift a finger because we don't use our brain at all literally we humans don't access the capacity of their brains and if they would they would be extremely powerful stop thinking that you know everything and that that you don't have to learn anything anymore and all these things no like the one of the most
confident people they're always willing to learn and highly intelligent people as well and they also say Hey listen I don't know enough about this subject I don't know what I'm talking about I I cannot answer this like admit when when you don't know how I do this for example is if I don't know enough about a subject I say yeah I don't know anything about that and when the person is telling me I tell them can you teach me because I want to learn and that's also how I'm become more confident because I have more
knowledge knowledge about the world about myself about people around me they wired your mind with positive affirmations I know I've said it 100 times but this is because it actually works I listen to positive affirmations myself till this day I listen to my own uh meditation affirmation video that I uploaded the one about beauty and confidence I listen to it myself and every time I listen to it I feel so much more confident and I literally find myself more attractive you believe in your mind is the most powerful thing that's the only thing that will
manifest and our mind is wired negatively first so the person that your mind will do is it will go to the negative side and think negatively so to put on some meditation or some affirmations on your phone and listen to to it positively it's not a bad thing it's not something crazy it's good for you it will help you it will rewire your mind imagine you say an affirmation every single day I am powerful you say that just every day even if you don't believe it I am powerful I'm past awful and Powerful you look
at yourself in the mirror you say I'm powerful I'm powerful what will happen you will start to be powerful feel powerful and attract powerful people trust your ability to bounce back from anything I said this in my previous video about an interview that I watched from Lisa Nichols where she said true confidence comes from your ability to bounce back from anything so basically she was like when I do something I think about you know what even if this thing fails I can bounce back from it I can do it again I know I can do
it again and that is actually true confidence if you see when you do something it doesn't have to be perfect if you're waiting for it to be perfect you will never even start because perfect does not exist and you will not be happy but if you think to yourself you know what I'm going to try this thing and maybe maybe this thing will not work out but at least I tried it and when it fails I will try something else that is when you have to reach true confidence in yourself and in your ability this
thing is be authentic and humble every confident truly confident person I know is themselves authentically they they just are the way they are they they just don't try to like oh I can't say that because otherwise I will not fit in no they just say what they want and they're obviously not rude but everything they say is their opinion and what they feel like and that's it they're authentically themselves and they don't try to be someone else also they're humble I have not this is actually being insecure for sure if you think that you're better
than anyone you're you're 100 insecure humble person doesn't need to be surrounded by only celebrities all only big names isn't that no a humble person can sit with someone on the street sit with them and have a lovely conversation and can sit with big names and have the same conversation they don't care because they don't have to prove themselves to anyone see there's confidence in them but when you have people that are not humble and like use like oh I'm famous I'm this and that what's Fame at the end of the day what is this
it means nothing tomorrow if people stop watching you yeah that's it you're not famous anymore for example honestly I love my fans but whether I have them or I don't have them tomorrow my life does not change my confidence does not Shake because I don't take my value from being an online personality that's not who I am that's not who I am at all actually if you base your worth on the validation of other people and on oh yeah so many people like me I have so many likes this and that you will crumble and
you will crumble fast because when those people leave what do you have at the end of the day that's why you need to be strong in yourself with or without I love myself and that is all that matters another thing is exercise join a sport do whatever listen first of all you will not only physically look better you will release dopamine in your head which is the reward chemical of your brain I literally had a personal trainer and when I was training with him oh my God like I felt like a thousand bucks like literally
my coughness shut up like crazy every time I completed a workout you know why as well because maybe at the time when I was there I didn't want to be there I didn't want to work out but the fact that I completed it I felt so proud of myself and then I started to think like oh this what more can you do that obviously will make you more confident about yourself also if you don't want to exercise join a sport that you like doesn't matter what it is do it once a week or whatever do
life exercises like uh Pilates strength training all these things go for walks there's so many things you can do to get your body moving and last but not least I need you to understand that God the universe life whatever you believe in wants you to win God wants you to win why would God put us on Earth give us this life to just make us suffer that is not love okay and I believe God is love so I believe whatever I do God has my back and he wants me to win he's like come on
let's come on he wants me to do good and he wants you to do good as well and make you feel more confident the fact that you're protected the fact that life God wants you to win they want to see you do good they're rooting for you if you feel like you have no support God is rooting for you he's rooting for you I believe we were put on Earth to suffer I don't believe that I really don't I believe that we were here to learn lessons and to evolve but I believe that we have
support we have protection but you have to ask God for things you have to ask him hey can you help me with this whatever you know and you have to believe that it will come this is the big issue as well right we only go to God or we only ask him things when things are going wrong but do you ever talk to him when things are going right and you're just happy repeat this affirmation in your head life wants me to win God wants me to win repeat that in your head and I promise
you you will not fail hey guys thank you so much for watching this video I hope you guys learned something and I see you in the next video bye
