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RH DA DISCÓRDIA

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2.69M745 Mots3m readGrade 2
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Porta dos Fundos
Hi, everybody. Good afternoon. -Hi.
-Good afternoon. -How are you? -All good.
I imagine that you're a little worried. It's Monday. HR of contention.
But, you know, that's not what today is about, it's just a dynamic to get to know each other better. It's supposed to be fun, it's supposed to be light. Is that all right?
How will it work? Each one holds a small board, then writes a good thing about a colleague in it. I'll give an example.
Easy-going and fun -Vinícius. -Really? You bring joy to our team.
Thank you, Dr. -Now it's my turn, right? -Now you go.
Concerned about health. Pedro. -Me?
-Yes. Why is Pedro concerned about his health? Because he gets at least three sick notes a week, which has started to become too much.
Swollen fingernail, sick note. Scratchy throat, sick note. Sometimes I call him, worried: "Pedro, what is it?
" And he says: "Nothing, I got a sick note, staying at home". It rains sick notes. So, he's a guy concerned with his health because he's always getting a sick note.
Cool, uh. Really cool. -Is it me now?
My turn? -Now it's your turn. Attentive.
-This one goes to Vinícius. -Me? -Me?
-That's it. Two boards already. This amazing colleague who's so attentive to other people's lives.
Good listener too, always listening to what we're saying, then comes to a meeting and says it was his idea. What was the last time? Was it in the bathroom?
In the bathroom. Look, it's all right for you to criticize but let's focus on constructive criticism? That's meant to improve.
Sounds good? -Sounds good. -I think it's cool.
Can I go now? I was listening to you and I liked the game. Now I'm ready to participate and I'm writing something that you're going to love.
Lovely. That's for my pal Vinícius. Holy shit, today.
. . -You are lovely.
-Three. Because he's so nice to everyone, he's loving, he does everything to please, especially our boss. He's been trying for a month to win a Chevrolet Equinox 0km.
And he's said that if he wins he'll give the car to the boss. It's a lot of love. There's so much love that.
. . it drips from his mouth.
Spreading lots of love. I don't need a car because I live near work. And I said I was going to take a break.
. . I know you live in the suburbs.
And where is our office? In Ipanema, that hasn't changed. Ihhh, Ipanema.
I have relatives who live nearby. This one is a player. He plays and plays.
. . Look, it's about writing a good thing and waiting for the colleague to finish speaking.
-Right. I like that dynamic. -It's not your turn.
-By the way, can I go again? -Please. I really liked it.
Now I think I. . .
Starting a Monday with this dynamic is so nice. Made. .
. Dr. .
. -this wonderful person, sweet, innocent, HR person- . .
. stay. .
. . .
. late. .
. . .
. at work. .
. . .
. to screw. .
. . .
. her. .
. -tan tan tan tan- . .
. her husband! What's that?
! You have to put the name of whoever did this! So, who is it?
Pedro knows too. -Is it Bianca? -Bianca!
You, Bianca? Such good dynamics. You made me run after everybody's shoe number.
"I want to play a Secret Santa of flip-flops". And I helped you out. What did you do?
No, wait a minute, dammit! You must write it on the board otherwise, you'll ruin the game. Let's do it!
Great! Give me the board here. I have two boards now to write a lot of things.
She. . .
. . .
stinks. Didn't I tell you? Here, hold the board.
You must hold it. May I explain myself? Don't I have the right to reply?
No, you don't. Give me this. You are eliminated and you cannot speak without holding the board.
Come on, you guys! Fake sick notes three times a week, you steal everybody's idea and you flatter the boss all day long. He wants to give him a Chevrolet Equinox.
He already said: "if I win I'll give it to my boss". And I'm in the wrong? For God's sake!
You're so preachy! Preachy! Preachy!
Preachy! But I take showers. Brazil is seeing what's going on here!
[telephone rings] [voice off] Attention! Pay close attention. Close the Tik Tok dance tab.
Everybody loses 20% of food stamps. I didn't know I couldn't dance. Sorry.
I really didn't know, people. I didn't know I couldn't, okay?
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