[Music] yo Mark 9 they really don't think we can keep doing this oh maybe I'll move this mic a little bit the breathing the everything yes I like it you hear the breathing does this help in kind of uh meditation I mean how is hearing how is the voice will affect us in how we feel sometimes we use music that's true and um or we Listen yeah to other people you know we have a good microphone so we can listen to each other this I love the microphone it's uh and it's shy yes it's sure
sm70 sure I see they went viral after pandemic everyone wants to start a podcast and they you sure right yes amazing it's a beautiful name sure yeah what are you sure about right the microphone yes I like it and you vision what are you sure about in life are we recording have we started are I'm sure That life is going to be amazing why do we always have the anxiety and is usually from the future for me it's from the future but it's always related to the Past anxiety related to the Past anxiety is like
the base of why you have anxiety is probably because you had an experience in the past where your childhood but the anxiety comes is what's we are always feared of what's what's U things from the things that we Don't know about is always we are have anxiety from the future yeah and your question is why do we have anxiety from the future for the future because you said I'm sure it's going to be an exciting or an amazing future that's because I don't have anxiety anymore I did I don't anymore and you know why I
had a I have a mentor and I think one of the things I'm grateful for in my life is that being able to have really good mentors in life because of um running Mind Valley and being able to work with so many amazing teachers and authors and inspiring individuals and one of this mentors is this University Professor called SRI kumara and he's this guy from India and he moves to the US and he becomes a famous university professor and he's teaching in Kellogg and Colombia University and people are lining up to get into his classes
you have to get on a weight list to go and study with this man and so I this man I Had him do a program for mind Valley and we became friends and we would talk a lot and one of the things he told me is he said you know beliefs shape our world what you believe about the world is going to be true for you right and we see this right now with medicine if we believe something about our health it impacts our health we all know this it's called a placebo effect but I
asked shumar what is the most important belief and he said the most important belief in His mind that any human being can have is the belief of a benevolent universe and what he means by that is the belief that the universe or God is watching out for you so if you believe in God change that line to a benevolent God that God of the universe is watching out for you is protecting you and anything that happens to you is happening not to you but for you there's a meaning for it there's a reason for it
let's [Laughter] see I'll say it again sorry about that that's fine and that anything that's happening to you is happening for you for a greater meaning I have that belief it didn't come easy I didn't always have that belief but I have that belief now and I got to say it puts that anxiety away I don't experience anxiety really for anything right now even for my own death you said the always thatth the Mind can change the body or can cure the body and this is how you started like uh in this journey exactly right
is um whatever you believe in is actually can affect your life your body and can make a change MH exactly yeah and uh we is it something that we have a hope in things and then we manifest them and then they come to us and then our life will change or does it have a direct effect really on ourselves so let me tell you the reality Your mind has a greater impact on your body than many medicines that you take and in some cases a greater impact on your body than even intervention that involves surgery
so we've all heard of the placebo effect you have a a pain a doctor gives you a pill the pill is just water and sugar but the pain goes away why because you believe the pill works but our ability for our mind to impact our body is so so so powerful it can also influence things that Require surgery so there was a famous study um that the New York Times wrote about in 2013 a doctor called JB Mosley he was aware that many men men over 50 go for surgery to remove arthritis pain in the
knees so he wanted to see is the surgery really causing the pain to go away he had a theory a radical theory that the pain was going away because the men believed the surgery helped but the surgery did not nothing so he did an experiment he got 10 men and he told Them all they were going to get free surgery for arthritis of thee these were all veterans US veterans meaning ex-military soldiers eight of the men they got a fake surgery a sham surgery so they put the men under anesthesia they made little slips on
their knee they bandaged it up they sewed it up the men they woke up there was these cuts on their knee there was bandages with blood they were convinced they had the surgery and two people Actually had the real surgery for knee arthritis after a month every single one had their knees cured the two people who had the surgery were cured the eight people who had the fake surgery they were also cured and JB Mosley's work like dazzled the medical community because the medical community begin to realize just how powerful the placebo effect is our
mind over our body and now we see this in a stunning way for example I just Read this study you know sometimes people get sick you're in a hospital this happened to my father recently right so my father was recovering from um from from cancer um and I left my dad and as he was recovering he wasn't getting a chance to walk much so his legs got weaker and so after his recovery period he couldn't walk very far cuz the muscles shrank this happens to a lot of people even happens to young people but scientists
studied the simple Fact people who were in bed they would visualize themselves walking for a few minutes and if they just visualize walking their muscle loss is 50% less can you imagine that 50% less not from walking from visualizing yourself walking it shows just how powerful the mind is your mind can heal you of things that require surgery your mind can slow down illness slow down things like muscle loss your mind has an amazing command over your body and this is Something everyone should realize when you worry about becoming sick you are actually more likely
to become sick you can but if you believe you can to be healthy that your body heals itself if you have a belief that you sleep well and your sleep is rejuvenating you will actually experience the impact of better sleep it turns out it gets crazier Hickman it gets Wilder people who believe that they didn't get a good night's sleep even if scientists Studying them actually show that they slept well the next day they won't perform well if they had a bad night sleep and you believe you had a good night's sleep the next day
you will perform well and I believe I believe in that especially I believe like if if you uh kind of victimize yourself if you always like think oh I'm going to get sick you actually can get sick right you know and then it's not only you can cure yourself if you believe that you can Cure yourself but you can get sick if you're always you know under that victim mentality under that weakness that that the word is against me and always that negative thinking it can actually bring right you know like weaknesses and sickness to
to you yeah and so so many people people are crazy about biohacking people are spending incredible amounts of money on highly expensive medical devices on procedures is it the procedure or is it the fact that you are Spending that money and you believe that the procedure Works in short everything works if you believe it works your ancestors who worked with Witch Doctors The Witch Doctors actually healed them but it wasn't magic it was because their minds believed it work so you go and you buy this expensive biohacking device for maybe 10 $220,000 is the device
healing you or is it the belief that the device heals you right and that's the fascinating thing about the world today We're beginning to see just how powerful our minds are in impacting our body now you want to know something really wild your mind can also impact another person's body if I think positively of you and I send you good thoughts your body will respond even if we are not in the same room even if we are on different ends of the planet so you want to hear another really radical study okay Professor William broad
at the San Antonio mind Mind Science Center did the study in the 1970s so he took about 700 people uh he divided them into two groups he had one group in a room and they were receivers and another group was in the room and they were senders now the receivers were hooked up to 19 to machines that measured 19 different biological markers okay so you're measuring skin resistance you're measuring heart rate you're measuring reading rate measuring stress level that was for the receivers the Senders were in a separate room the senders were paired up with
the receiver they couldn't see each other they were in different rooms and at a specific point say 2:06 p.m. the senders were told okay think good thoughts about your partner about your receiver and they would think good thoughts they would imagine they were sending energy and at exactly that time the receivers they would see changes in the machines changes like things for for example you Know when you are less stressed you actually have you have actually less skin resistance so they would see that the biomarkers were showing that the person was getting more relaxed that
the person was getting less stressed that their heart rate was get becoming more healthy that their breathing rate was slowing down when they were being beamed through time and space these positive thoughts your mind doesn't just influence your body at a wider level we Are deeply connected even if we are strangers and your mind can influence someone else oh that's stunning that's amazing but to what level we should be um taking this as as a rule to our in our life you know how much we we have to follow the physics we have to follow
the medicine we have to follow you know life by it's ups and downs we have to drive our car let's let's talk about that so firstly you're speaking about it like It's something paranormal no n Harman the physicist said spirituality is nothing more than physics we have yet to find an equation for does science know everything no can science explain God can science explain why prayer sometimes heals people science cannot explain everything but if we choose to live in a world where we refuse to accept anything that science can't explain that's a bloody boring world
now I'm not saying ignore the science and by the way Everything I cited is science I told you about the the arthritis of the N study that was science Dr JB mostly studied that I'm even giving you the name of the scientist so you can look it up the the distance effect okay influencing the biology of another person at a distance I gave you the scientist name Dr JB Mosley there are books on this you can read it up this is science so science can show that the phenomenon is real can science explain it no
we have theories But there lots of things science can't explain we we don't fully understand but we know it's real we don't fully understand String Theory but we kind of know I mean it's literally a theory we don't really really really really understand lots of things about the universe we don't really understand the concept of scotting a scat but we know these things are real so there's a difference between science showing it's real and we understanding how it works Science is showing this is real science is showing intuition is real science is showing the mind
body healing effect is real for example no drug in America can be released unless it's tested against a placebo why because the placebo effect is real but can we explain it no that's what we can't do but just because you can't explain something doesn't mean you can't use it I mean think about your ancestors 500 years ago we used the Sun for navigation we used the sun to grow Food we used the Sun for warmth did anyone know what the sun was no they thought it was a giant orb of Fire in the Sky or
the the god of polo racing across the sky in his Chariot they couldn't explain the Sun but they could use the sun we can't explain body healing but we can sure use it class yes it's true in in the Practical world and especially let's say in the in the corporate world right I mean we struggle with this um you know feelings How to use how to be comp compassionate with each other while the systematic corporate world or the or the business doesn't allow that it's just like they use it as a fashion or or something
that they going to put a flag that we are let's say empowering women or we are uh we have a game room or a relaxing room in our uh it's only big corporation that they start to put it and it's I don't know how much it's like actually they believe in it or just it's a it's Something that uh they you know it's a Cota they have to do it in terms of like being nice with each other or having some uh more uh vacation to other people or you know all all these things in
the corporate world sometimes practically it doesn't work what works for them is longer hours what works for them is that's not true is is um that's what's been tested you know but the the the backlash and the fight of people asking we need to have more compassion Women Rights are are actually helped in that like you know we we can't be 100% equally treated as physically as as we as we are but we should be equally treated right in a different way and uh which open the door that we need to be more compat compassion
at work I mean this is a practice that I do in my business right um but in the Practical world how much we can Implement all this so again let's look at science because there's this tendency in the world to Say all of these is unscientific and this is rubbish I can give you the science for all of this phenomenon so let's break down what you're asking you're asking about compassion at work and you're asking about the the relationship between productivity and output at work okay so let's look at productivity and output pre- AI Germans
okay German people versus American people Americans get on average two days off a year it's pathetic I Don't know how you can you can survive with just getting two week weeks of holiday sorry not two days two weeks two weeks of holiday a year Germans get anywhere from four to six four to six weeks of holiday German worker productivity pre- AG of AI is was higher than American worker productivity and German Workers have better rights Less hours more holidays their productivity is higher this is the reality human beings are not Pure input output machines you
cannot just push a human being to work Non-Stop and say this is going to increase productivity we are human for a reason we're not robots now why I say prei is because with the Advent of AI different countries are seeing different changes in productivity based on how much they're using AI right by the way you know the country with the highest percentage of its population using AI right now is it the UAE not it's Morocco M Morocco you know the second country highest percentage of its population India so which is kind of crazy so different
countries have different AI adoption rates based on cultural attitudes and so on I don't know what's up with Moroccans but they seem to really love AI so if you take out AI there is no relationship between the amount of holidays and productivity now obviously if you give someone six months of holidays we might see um an adverse Relationship but I think American companies would do better if they gave their workers more time off so that's one now we can go on to the other aspects compassion at work and and the fluffy stuff at work there's
so much evidence that that actually matters this is why more and more companies are doing it if it didn't work you wouldn't see Silicon Valley companies adopting these practices and I love the fact that you said that uh being compassion to other Is is actually not doing uh good for others you're doing good for yourself and and the fact that you are treating other with with um with love with compassion is actually you are doing um good things for you CU it manifests itself and it returns back to you and you gave an example a
beautiful example for the worker in the in the in in the restaurant that you tipped her although you didn't have a good um service at that time but you felt like okay I mean Um I have to tip her because she she worked hard although I didn't get the result but how how do we get that for for ourself that that story went viral I didn't tip the waitress because she worked hard no I tip the waitress because in my mind and how I see the world we're all human beings we're all deeply connected and
I could see that she was going through um um a really delicate situation may I share the story for your audience that may not know it So it's a story I wrote about my book uh the six phas meditation and it has to do with compassion I said that compassion is a muscle we can train ourselves to be compassionate the human mind is a really funny thing we are extremely judgmental we look at a human being they do one thing wrong and we label them right so you see you see a a guy who is
maybe grumpy maybe he had an issue with his wife maybe you know his boss yelled at him and he's just grumpy as he's Ordering coffee and you label him forever the grumpy man but that's a really unfair of looking at human beings we don't look at all of the other wonderful moments in this man's life we look at a tiny slice and that becomes the label now I try to avoid that I think all of us should so I was in a restaurant and um Co had just ended and I went to a restaurant with
a friend of mine and everyone was rushing the restaurants cuz they had just opened so I'm we had there standing in line it takes 20 minutes to get in now we get in it takes another 10 minutes to sit down now we sit down and I order my usual omelette with with you know with with some sausage on the side and some avocado and a cup of coffee and the waitress brings the coffee but forgets to hand it to me she puts it on the counter far away and I'm sitting there craving my coffee wishing
I could like just grab that coffee and finally when I Get the weest attention and she brings me the coffee it's gone cold and who wants cold coffee right so I have to ask for another cup it takes another 20 minutes now I get my eggs the avocado is missing so it's a complete disaster so at the end of it we're about to leave and I tipped the waitress this was in Europe the the bill was maybe €0 I tipped the waitress 50 so my friend asked me what are you doing she doesn't deserve that
the service was horrible And I said well there's another way to look at it and that is we just came out of Co that waitress she could be a mother and maybe during Co she didn't have a job maybe she didn't get paid her boss probably couldn't pay her because the restaurants couldn't open and who knows how much she was suffering and now she's finally back at work and she has to walk around with a mask that must be so uncomfortable while we didn't need a mask she needed one and she's Dealing with this massive
influx of customers and the restaurant hasn't expanded their weight staff it's not because she's incompetent she's just busy she's doing her best to serve all of these people who are trying to come to a restaurant cuz Co just ended and that's why I'm tipping her $50 because she's doing her best and because we after months and months and months of having to eat at home we got to eat out and who cares if the coffee was a little Bit cold who cares if she skipped my avocado we got to eat out after 8 months and
that's pretty darn special so you see the reframe so when you stop judging people you stop saying oh that waitress was lazy but you try to put yourself in her shoes people are predominantly good or at least 99% of people are predominantly good but we forget that and we label and we judge and we do this not just for individuals we do this for entire societies we say French people Are rude you know um American people are loud I don't know what are the the judgments on emirati people but we judge and that's a really
not a good thing so that's that's how I like to view life now I want to go back to something you said you spoke about compassion at work is there evidence for that may I share really f fasinating scientific study yes please okay and again I'm Sting the science because I can tell that you're a science-based man and you want to hear The science I have compassion in my work that's definitely yeah yeah it's something I I uh I believe in I but prove me I mean some people proved me wrong I mean provve me
right because it's in the in the Practical world how much it's effective and being Compassion or being really um systematic so there's there's a difference you can be compassion and you can be strict I'm compassionate but strict that means I can I will reprimand an employee of mine And I did once for not following process and making repeated mistakes and putting her on on uh notice that if she repeated the mistake she would lose a job but a few weeks later the employee was involved in a car accident while on vacation not even in a
different country and she didn't have personal insurance and I was in a different country and my I called up my father and my father wed all the money she needed for her medical bills and we never asked for that money Back that is strict but compassionate nobody knows about that I didn't get any favorable employee reviews about that but that is what we mean by strict compassionate they're two completely different things now again let's talk about the evidence for this in the workplace I was interviewing sha AER the Harvard researcher okay and sha AER he
studies happiness and how happiness actually boosts productivity and there are again numerous studies of this Doctors Prime to be happy are 19% better at making diagnosis positive sales people are 55% better at closing a sale so sha AO did this this this experiment he was invited to a company um I believe it was somewhere in Omaha I remember the CEO of the company's name Gary Baker and Sean said Gary was a numbers guy Gary told me I don't believe in this this fluffy crap okay but you do what you need to do improve the culture
of my company so Sean created this one Protocol he said I want all the employees to do this before you start work at 9: a.m. in the morning take out your iPhone and set a timer for 2 minutes in that 2 minutes write a letter of appreciation to one of your co-workers you could say hey John you know that presentation you did yesterday amazing research and I love that you prepare so well and you're so good at speaking 2 minutes sha AA said if it's less than 2 minutes it feels you know it It it
doesn't feel serious if it's more than 2 minutes it's too much work so 2 minutes so they had all the employees do this in things started changing so fast this company was doing 650 million in Revenue in 18 months Revenue shot up to 950 million the number of applications that they were getting from people who wed to be new employees went up 270% Google flew down to see what they were doing and Gary Baker he would now take according to Shan AER his sales People off the sales flow to do a little circle of appreciation
all because of showing appreciation now why does this work I think there are so many different theories everyone wants to feel appreciated everyone wants to feel acknowledged it seems that when we feel compassion from our co-workers when we feel happy and appreciation makes us happy our productivity goes up so many theories we can't really explain why but we know it Works okay I'm going to be a little bit tough on you so I I like T go ahead okay and we have people who needs hope in their life and then especially in business and they
struggle in their life in general uh it's either because life is tough anyway on everybody and they are more compassion and they are more uh soft and tender and they have they have also traumas that they been through and kind of these words resonate with them so much and and they feel like this Is the only um cure or way or or the the the they going to reach their goal through that through these theories and these words but the people who are good at it is somebody like you who's professional in that and somehow
it's like you know it's like who who needs the gym usually the the the trainer he doesn't need a gym because he's the most fit person and who needs a gym is is the person who Actually are struggling from from overweight and and they need a gym and they need to move but these two people feeds each other but the it's always who's winning is the I don't know how to explain it you get my point I think what you're saying is that they are they are people who are compassionate comp compassionate but life isn't
working out for them exactly exactly and and so the people who are gravita towards these words are mainly People who needs it the most but they are not the most successful in in achieving their goals in general sometimes sometimes so I I I want to State um what I believe is a commonly mistaken belief right so firstly no one is saying that you just have to be nice to succeed in the world there's a difference between being nice and being compassionate compassionate means you understand you understand that we are deeply connected species you you Understand
that not everyone may be as privileged at you people have different backgrounds different economic backgrounds they they might even be be be coming from different circumstances maybe they were abused as a child maybe they went through a devastating breakup maybe they have um uh some type of non-neurotypical brain condition and they perceive the world differently you got to understand that understanding that I believe makes You a better person because human beings in a way we are like ants we are a social creature you take a human being and you make him live by himself in
a forest and he goes insane we are ants we live within a society and for a society to be cohesive we must be compassionate with each other but if you look at ants ants have their regimens they have their roles they have their their their duties they work together but they know what their duties are right so people who are Compassionate but they are flip fluffy they don't have Clarity on their goals that don't have Clarity in what they're trying to build they may suffer you need both now in my writings I call this the
merger of the Buddha and the badass the Buddha and this is not a religious term it's a archetype it's the spiritual core the badass is the entrepreneur The Hustler the Builder the Creator the person creating things you have to have both but there's a Great Dogma in spirituality that says that to be spiritual you have to be all squishy and gooey and soft of and calm and just rooted in the present that is not true Ken Wilbur who's one of the the most cited academic of our time a dear friend of mine in a teacher
on mind Valley wrote a famous essay called egolessness and the essay actually says your ego is good don't give up your ego and he says this in the essay I quote him ver him the great spiritual sages of The world from Moses to Jesus to patma Samba were not feeble-minded Mose they will move us and Shake us who rattled the world with the force of their ambition and ego from bull whips in a temple to subduing entire continents they created revolutions that lasted centuries think about the great spiritual teaches you follow Buddha was he just
meditating under a bod tree no he instigated instigated a social Revolution Jesus Jesus was a badass he Brought a bullwhip to a temple Moses he helped his people flee the Egyptians Muhammad Muhammad conquered so much territory in such a short amount of time that the Roman Empire was completely dazzled yet all of these spiritual teachers were deeply rooted in their spiritual being they were spiritual badasses they were compassionate they were kind look at their sayings read their books they were all deeply loving compassionate individuals but they also Stood up for their beliefs they stood up
for their people and they left and they were badasses that is who we want to to to model so you can you can be both you're saying of course you have to be both so you can be a politician um you know who's badass as you using this term exactly but still compassionate yeah you can prison 1 million person but be compassion to a a young child who needs help well when I Say badass I don't mean imprison one people why would you do that unless there was a reason for it I mean badass as
in being able to go against societal expectations being able to make difficult decisions so again let's look at the science right so there's a really interesting phenomenon that I think is worth talking about since your audience is 90% women I believe women make better political leaders and I want to State the scientific evidence why let's look At at at at Evolution so I was just interviewing a a doctor by the name of Dr Mindy pels and we were speaking about a theory called the grandmother the grandmother hypothesis right and it states this menopause is a
construct of evolution for a very unique purpose do you know okay we are mammals do you know very very very few mammals actually experience menopause it's human beings orcas and pilot whales that's it human Beings orcas and pilot whales some say elephants experience it but it's only a few creatures and the one thing that all of these mammals have is they are deeply intelligent and they communicate with each other whale songs whales communicate over the distances of the sea human beings we have our language so why is it that when animals get more intelligent menopause
happens right and again for the men who are listening menopause simply means that at a certain Point in a woman's life she's unable to conceive she's unable to make baby well the theory is this at a certain point Evolution said okay women your job is no longer to make babies we're going to put a stop there because making babies if you're an animal or if you're a human 20,000 years ago is risky you could die we're going to put a stop there because we need you to be alive now Evolution didn't do that for men
men can continue making babies until they Die sperm quality can go down if you're like you know over 70 but theoretically you can still ejaculate why did Evolution stop women from making babies Evolution was inventing grandmothers because grandmothers were designed to stay alive to keep the wisdom of the tribe remember Evolution primarily happened before the Advent of writing the wisdom whether it's making fire knowing what berry to eat knowing how to nurse an injured child that knowledge Had to be locked up somewhere and it was locked up in the brain of the Elder woman but
it gets even more intriguing when a woman goes goes through menopause her brain literally changes she becomes more compassionate more loving she becomes she develops a greater sense of empathy but she also develops a an irreverence in other words she's I don't care what everybody thinks I'm going to do what is right Evolution was not just inventing grandmothers for knowledge Capture they were inventing women as Leaders I believe you go back thousands of years tens of thousand of years women L Human Society now is there evidence for it in modern times well during the pandemic
something really interesting happened Harvard did a study on female politicians and in fact I was noticing something similar and I commissioned my team to do a similar study both studies showed the same thing Co was a really interesting experiment right you Countries had to shut down and the job of all politicians was keep people alive and prevent spread of this disease while creating as minimal damage to the economy as possible using an index such as the return to normaly index some countries like Malaysia horrible Malaysia was bottom of the G50 in the return to normaly
index but some countries like New Zealand did extending well now what was the common factor among the countries that did Astoundingly well women leaders if you take all the countries in a in and everyone is having a similar problem Co the primary problem women leaders outperform men like crazy now was this because of the grandmother hypothesis and the unique advantages of a woman's brain I believe so it's not popular to say that but I believe that when it comes to politics women do better because government and business are different I know people like Elon Musk
said let me control the government no I don't think Elon Musk truly understands the the the the the the reason for governance politicians are company are designed for ruthless efficiency governments are designed not for ruthless efficiency but to give everyone everyone an equal footing right so if you're sick you don't have to go bankrupt so if you happen to be a different skin color your life isn't Going to suck and for that particular utility of governance I think women make better leaders and so that is why I believe that compassion is so important and in
our political leaders especially compassion is an advantage and I believe women are stronger in taking decision not to stay in a place where they are not comfortable in and and Corona you gave an example in Corona is Corona is like Show them an example is like there's a disaster but I'm still here and nothing happen right so why don't I look for a better opportunity in my life and that's why they can be leaders or they can change their work or or they can divorce or take a different decisions yeah so men are more focused
on doing the the job and accepting more whether it's harder or it's uh tougher or it's mentally tougher they would say okay I don't want to you know nag about mental Things and and about um uh my uh how I'm happy you know it's more how I'm making money how I'm provider but the women are more like caring on that uh part yeah do you have more women audience as well my audience uh on mind Valley is approximately 60 to 65% women the I think men needs more as well because I believe women are more
aware right of spiritualities of taking care of uh probably I mean you correct me if wrong but they do more yoga they do more Meditation meditation so so probably men needs it more than men these days well definitely men men need balance in their lives as well right I think when it comes to male to to men as well men are not having an easy time and that's definitely something we're talking about why did Trump win Trump won because if you look at the Democratic party they're all about they're all about minorities they're all about
rights of women they're all about um um LGBT rights but White men are suffering their income is going down more and more of them are having to live with their parents they're having it economic um injustices happen to them and no one is talking about that so men really need support and our world as it's constructed right now doesn't really help men as much as it should men are blamed for a lot of things that they don't deserve to be blamed for okay does the woman needs uh to wear the trouser okay to be a
leader So so what I think you're asking is do women need to play masculine masculine role in the workplace yes no no and I think this is actually a big misconception so I was speaking at the world government Summit here in Dubai in 2022 and this was the subject of my speech it was why women need to understand that there are certain feminine qualities as CEOs as Founders that give them an edge it doesn't mean don't follow anything guys Do right masculine and feminine are different ways of perceiving the world but they're also simplistic simplistic
archetypes but feminine leadership has a lot of advant that we're only beginning to see so first we got to understand that the world of work emerged after World War II primarily from the US which won World War II and the way we design work the 9 to5 the corporate hierarchy is very much modeled after the US military because what happen is you have All of these ex soldiers come back and they start companies and so they model what they know the hierarchy of the military which was predominantly men in World War II so our corporate
hierarchies until recently have been very male dominated and designed for men now women have different different schedules women have different ways of viewing work and it's only recently that we're beginning to see the advantages so for example feminine qualities are more Nurturing feminine qualities are more democratic women are more likely to create a consensus and listen to everyone in the group before making a decision feminist qualities are more empathy women listen better than men now all of these are scientifically proven through different studies I'm not just making a label I'm not saying women are this
and men are that these are scientific qualities because our brains are different for example if you look at SAT scores and math scores for SATs in 19 out of 20 countries men do better than women in math but in the vast majority of countries women do better than men in verbal in communication right this is why women often do really really really well in jobs which are related to nurture to care to communication men do really really really well in jobs related to science and engineering so let's go back to feminine Qualities here's one study
Gallup did a poll of 10 million employees and they asked the employees a simple question does my supervisor or manager care for me as a person okay supervisor manager now employees who said yes my supervisor cares for me as a person and that's a very feminine quality nurturing caring they were the most engaged at work they contributed more to to uh profitability per employee they stayed longer in the companies they rated their companies Higher all of these good things corresponding to one question they felt cared for earlier I cited the Sha AA study on appreciation
at work how one company increased its revenues by almost 50% by implementing a culture of recognition and appreciation 2 minutes a day that too is a feminine quality empathy listening appreciation nurturing all of these are feminine qualities women need to bring this in the workplace don't walk into a workplace And try to model your male boss when you graduated school I mean maybe he had some good qualities but feminine qualities really really really have a huge advantage in work today and when you can balance both masculine qualities Precision directions um logic and The Feminine quality
intuition empathy you gain an advantage now here's another crazy study which I think is worth talking about professor John molaski of the nework College of Engineering did a study on CEOs and intuition so we often think of women's intuition women are in most cases seen as being more intuitive than men have there been any studies that show that women are more intuitive I don't know but women intuition is a more feminine thing so per Professor molaski does this study and he has five cards and the CEOs have to guess which card he's holding up so
the odds of guessing correctly are 20% now what he found is some CEOs are Guessing 23 24 25% accurate they were using their intuition M and this and these CEOs they tended to have higher profitability in their companies right so this shows that there's a correlation between intuition and profitability and women do intuition better so this is another feminine quality that you don't want to tune out feminine qualities have an incredible advantage in the workplace and women more women should be aware of this recognize this and know that they Don't have to wear the pants
in a workplace and be men they should be women the world needs that more great another question which everyone ask and especially it's a it's a kind of debate or discussion we had it a lot I I've been interviewing Love is Blind Habibi and uh it's a show in Netflix and all the topics they were like about man being the provider woman wants to work or doesn't want to work and uh that debate whenever A woman says like I want to have um a man who just provides me all the luxury and life and I
don't want to work um although that's this is against feminist at the same time a lot of people agrees on that uh a lot of women were agreeing on on that topic so and then if there is a man say that you know I will take care about you I'll take care about everything and but you need to slightly I want to direct the let's say that Company that it's called our home it sometimes seen as a toxic Mas anality in in in one place and another it seen as like oh he's great he's a
masculine man and we love him so it's really you don't know where to draw the line and there's very different opinions on on that Set uh and different cultures right you know in in the Arab war is more leaning like woman likes to be U more um looking for a provider in in general I don't want to generalize you know but it's Mostly like that in in Europe maybe they are looking for or a different uh where do we draw the line well firstly everything that you said is a matter of personal choice I know
men who are stay-at-home fathers while the mother is working and bringing in most of the money that's okay who are we to judge I know women who don't want to work they want to stay at home they want to run the house take care of the kids and take care of their husbands and they Are incredible women who are we to judge everyone should have a right to create their relationships whichever way they want without needing to worry about what fit fits the societal Trend now among men I I remember having this debate with with
men I know what's the ideal type of woman to marry the Muse or the the entrepreneur okay now both of these are different types archetypes of women and of course there's everything in between that we simplifying it so I have a Friend he's built a company that has done 10 billion in Revenue his partner whom he's been with for over 30 years okay five kids 30 years three decades they have the most incredible love life they are still like in the honeymoon period and she says Vision it's because she is my muse I do the
work okay my job is to wake up in the morning and run the company and make things happen her job is to take care of our our our our family but I could never have built my Company to billions in sales if I didn't have her by my side she is 50% of all the success of my company because she nurtures me she gives me fuel she's my M she inspires me now this couple so cute this guy they they're now you know they're older right now they're in their 60s they're retiring and he's they're
retiring in Hawaii and he's building a house which faces the direction of the son so that on his wife's birthday the son is exactly Exactly like where it needs to be to create this gorgeous Panorama of the house that's love and that's the Muse relationship now there are other types of relationship where like I enjoy being with women who are entrepreneurs whom I can discuss ideas that excites me I find that sexy discussing ideas talking about new technologies I like that type of woman I love nurturing my woman I want to be nurtured by my
woman but at the same time I'm attracted to women who are Entrepreneurs in building something so I'm attracted more to the the the entrepreneur archetype that's my choice no matter what choice you you you pick pick one that works for you and again there is no right answer and your choices might might vary depending on the stage of relationship you're in so I think it's so dumb so absolutely dumb to force men or women to fit into one box it's true who we are to judge and that's the right thing and each person has his
Own views his own taste and his own like what um he's looking or she's looking for and this will bring another question how we can attract love and attract uh our partner oh that's interesting question what what what can we do cuz like um I know we get distracted in in life and especially men they get distracted looking for job and this and they miss opportunity on the way they miss uh uh looking at themsel what they want from Inside and and then they they miss the opportunity to to find the partner it's a it's
a very lonely time for many people right people are getting married later and later fewer and fewer people are finding Partners until they're much older like in their 30s and everyone's complaining about it now the first thing is stop freaking complaining about it because your mind creates your reality what you complain about you amplify what you praise or what you appreciate Appreciates so first first advice would be this recognize that the world is changing do you know today in America and I'm speaking America because statistics are often most readily available for America but what applies
to America tends to be trends that affect the rest of the world today if you go back to your parents generation most people met through religious events like church or or or uh prayer or they met through college or they met in the Company today 62% of married couples in America met online right and online is a polite way of saying dating apps and so firstly get on a dating app a lot of dating apps right now are awful and they're all about squeezing money out of you my the founder of Tinder is a friend
of mine and he sold Tinder and the guys who bought it it's all about squeezing money out of you but there are many other apps that maybe a little bit more more more useful so use the apps reality Is 2third of modern relationships are coming from these apps so who are we to say I'm not going to use a dating app now the second thing is this this whole idea about soulmates is BS I don't buy that I don't buy the you complete me thing rather I think our goal as a human being is to
work ourselves to be the best human being we can be because we will attract someone who's at our level and if your level right now is low that means you you're broke you're in bad Health you don't have discipline you don't have Ambitions you're more likely to attract someone of that sort we attract like attracts like that's not a metaphysical statement that is just how attraction works you attract it to people at your level but all of us have our own responsibility in our hand we can climb up that level we can learn to take
care of our bodies we can learn to create goals we can invest in self-improvement the whole mind value Philosophy is spend 20 minutes a day every day making yourself a better human and this adds up as you focus on yourself as you get better and better and better you're able to access a larger and larger and larger percentage of the dating pool so the more you climb up the easier it gets the easier it gets the easier it gets this applies to men and women and so I don't believe we should be obsessed with finding
the right partner Definitely get in a dating app use it like don't don't say dating apps are bad or I don't want to go on dates go on many dates think of it as a learning experience your attitude and the date really matters but focus on improving yourself so the quality of the dates you're getting gets better and better and better and I believe eventually inevitably you will find someone but you got to work at it just like you got to work at everything else that's that's Great work on yourself does that has to do
with manifestation as well can we manifest the uh so relationship yes I don't know 100% okay so I have a friend Katherine woodw Thomas she wrote the book calling in the one okay the official program for calling in the one is part of Mind Valley so Katherine claims that with the right mindset so she takes you to a program at 49 days and you every day you're doing something a form of forgiveness you're focusing on Your goals and she says you manifest a relationship in 49 days so here's a crazy story we had a girl
in our team her name is AA she was working on the videos of this program but as she's working and editing the video she's also listening to the program before the end of 49 days she meets a guy moves in with him now they're married right so this this type of philosophy works now is it magic is it manifesting or is it simply the fact That you're working on all those broken parts of you maybe from bad relationships in the past that are holding you back maybe it's that I don't know but I have seen
over and over and over again this happened I 100% believe in this and I believe that if you don't love that person that person doesn't love you so sometimes you actually want to go and have a date with that person but you're not convinced from inside CU you're not ready and you just want it For the for the shape of it for the image of it or just doing it so you're not ready you did not prepare yourself and you did not like open your feelings you just want to date a nice person or a
beautiful person and then it doesn't work and you know how you know you know how you know if you're dating the right person I I think there's a French philosopher I can't remember his name but he said this he said he said true love is really rare it's really really Really rare but to know true love it's when you're away from that person and you're away from that person and you grow fonder for them and immature love when you're away from that person you drift away from them true love is really really really rare but
if you can find someone and you're when you're away from them you do everything you can to want to be back with them you will travel across the oceans you miss them but if you're with someone and You're away from them and you're like wow this actually feels pretty good maybe it isn't true love now again that's some dead french guy who said that I'm not saying it's rooted in sence but I think that's a pretty interesting in measure podcast CL last question unless you want to say anything else no whatever you want marriage right
okay so love is we all need love mhm and we all need family but no I don't think we all need love well We all love is is a is a natural Human Condition one can gain it for themselves you don't need someone else to love you and you certainly not everyone needs a family we need people around us we don't need kids necessarily we don't need family we need people who who we can have tight social bonds with friends yeah that's a new that's a that's a relief for a lot of people that we
don't need the kids okay that's great cuz I want to ask you how difficult I mean It's complicated to have a family it's complicated to to have a forever marriage uh life it's something that you need to keep on investing uh in your life to make it happen right it is complicated I mean I had a bad experience so that's why and I've been through a divorce as well um but I'm very close friends with my ex-wife we were together for 19 years and no one is saying it's easy right but the thing to understand
is that here's why it's Complicated it's because we've created the society where there is this rubbish rule that love has to be forever no love is not forever the average American and again I mentioned I'm quoting Americans because that's where we have the stats right the average American will be in three meaningful relationships in their lifetime now what this means is you're going to die with one person but you're going to have two breakups you're going To have twice as many breakups as the person you're going to be with but are those breakups bad if
if if you if you go through life knowing I'm going to be with three people and if you're with someone maybe a College love or in early love and you break up it's okay odds are you're on the right track there's two more coming your way you see the breakup we've created all of these movies all of these stories all of this drama around the breakup we have to even that word Break no it's a gentle party when two people are no longer having as much fun as they want with each other when two people
are no longer growing together you should be breaking up to release both of you one of the most dangerous vows we make is that vow which I believe is rubbish till death do us part no you should never make that vow you should promise to be with someone as long as you're growing together as long as you're happy Together as long as you can truly support each other as long as you wake up and you and and they going to be days when you're like oh God this person irritates me but that but as long
as you are growing together I think that's the measure you're good but at a certain point you feel you want to break up or you want to change the relationship structure maybe you want to go for ethical non- monogamy no one's to judge there's nothing wrong with that so we Have to stop seeing breakups or divorces as a bad thing so much of the stress and Trauma that people have through breakups is self-inflicted because they have been trained to see it as a bad thing when it is not remember that quote I started this interview
with from Sri Kumar ra believe in a benevolent universe everything that happen s to you is happening for you not to you the breakup is for you because maybe you had to learn something and you're going to be Even an even more amazing partner to your next love when you understand that breakups are not a bad thing love is not as dramatic and life is so much more beautiful CU we're going to have you know three at least on average three great people enter our lives and journey with us for a moment and I think
that's a really beautiful way to look at it yes it's true vishan I really enjoyed talking to you I really enjoyed so many new and uh revolutionary words that you Said really I mean changed a lot my my perspective in in many things especially breakup uh thanks a lot and uh I heard you're living in Dubai which is great I you know that what are your plans he in general well I'm looking to create the world's biggest event for Mind Body Soul relationships and The Human Experience and it's happening in Dubai jentan 112 it's called
future human and and if you let me to I'd love to share a little bit about it yes go ahead so future human is Designed to look at the most important things we need to learn as human beings that are unconventional that the world doesn't teach us that we need to thrive in this rapidly changing world because the world is changing fast societal patterns are changing AI is changing the way we work is changing future human explores that and we bring in the most amazing teachers I've curated every single teacher with my team Marissa Pier
Steven Bart all of these incredible Names now day one is about work and you're going to learn all of these different things to help improve your work so you can save one day a week from how to optimize your brain with new biochemistry to the thought patterns around what's happening at work to some of the unconventional beliefs like what we've been sharing here too how to introduce and think about AI day two is about longevity literally we're about to hit Longevity uh a world where you can live forever it's called reaching longevity escape velocity but
the problem is while it's very possible that you could live to be three four five even a thousand you can't really halt aging you can't hit paes on Aging today we can slow down aging by about 40% so you can age 6 years for a normal person aging 10 years that's what the best biohack is are getting but how do you get there how do you age only 6 years for a normal 10 Years right we look at these topics and you're going to get the right exercise regimen the right food regimen be bringing in
some of the best speakers on health such as Dave asprey who's the father of biohacking and day three is my favorite day three is all about manifesting it's how to take the ideas in your mind and fine tune your mind to such Precision that you're a spiritual badass and you can move to words your ideas with freedom and then around all Of these incredible topics and incredible teachers is a layer of community we are releasing an app that will understand you and introduce you to maybe your new best friends or even even your next soulmate
I want to say that so that's that's what we're building four things Master work master your body master manifesting and gain some interesting new people in your life so it's happening Jan 10 1112 at the Expo Center and everything we do at my Company is really unique for example our app is so good it is the world's one of the world's best apps for changing human lives so good that Apple just selected it and it's in 200,000 Apple stores around the world if you go to the Apple Store even in Dubai Mall and you open
up an iPad there you will see our app on the on the iPad pre-installed by by Apple so if we're so good at building these things imagine the event the event is it's like the apple of event if Apple Could create an event it's this and that's what we're excited to bring to Dubai this event is going to grow to maybe 50,000 people every year it's going to be one of the most popular events in Dubai but I want to invite your audience to come at year one and experience it amazing can't wait to see
it thank you and also happy birthday happy birthday it's coming soon so oh yeah yeah yeah I'm turning 49 thank you for reminding Me I'm uh I'm about your age so happy birthday and thanks a lot and congratulation on all this work thank you thank you man thanks one on one for [Music]
