I couldn't stop yawning. We were having an orientation program at our school auditorium, but everything was so boring. I put on my earphones and listened to an upbeat song to wake myself up.
Soon, I just found myself singing along with it. "My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard, and they're like, it's better than yours. " Yeah, right.
"It's better than yours. " Suddenly, I stopped when I realized that everyone was looking at me like I mercilessly kicked a puppy. Whoa, what did I do now?
Just then, my sister Nova pointed to my earphones, and that's when I realized that my voice was louder than intended, and unfortunately, it was the prayer time. Oopsie. Hi, my name is Heather, and I'm your awkward main character who always ends up doing the most embarrassing things ever.
Before I continue, please like and subscribe. I was walking down the hallway when I noticed a guy smiling at me. He was holding a banner which said that he was asking me to the prom.
Holy crispy biscuits, someone actually liked me? I dramatically ran towards him and said, "Oh, my Romeo, yes, yes, yes, I'm going to the prom with you. " But to my surprise, he pushed me away.
"Ew, not you, weirdo. " He was actually asking the girl behind me. Well, that was a little awkward.
The girl was Shannon, the principal's daughter who acted like she was the queen of the world. She snatched the banner away from him and tore it in half. "How dare you ask me out with that ugly face of yours?
" The poor guy dashed away with tears. Shannon had been plastering her stupid face all over the school the whole day, trying to get everyone's votes for the prom queen. I even heard her badmouthing my sister Nova, her ultimate rival.
They had been competing in terms of fame and beauty, while here I was, just trying my best to act as normal as I could. Nova was a year younger than me, but we were in the same grade because, aside from being a goddess, she She also a genius, and everyone was just obsessed with her. When I went to the school gym to see her, I was surprised to see all the boys lining up in front of her.
"Please, Nova, I will do anything. Just go to the prom with me, and I'll kiss the ground you walk on. I'll pay you a million dollars and give you my private island.
" But Nova was too busy to care. On the other hand, no one had asked me out yet. Maybe I needed to step up my game this time.
Later that night, I decided to practice my social interactions. So, I chose my bookshelf to pretend as my boyfriend. While I was kissing it, I caught someone watching me through the bedroom window across mine.
Wait a minute. Was that Enzo? He used to be my grumpy neighbor when we were kids, but they moved out 10 years ago, and no one had lived in their house since then.
I was about to say hi to him, but he raised a banner to give me a message before closing off his window. Rude. During dinner, Mom told us that Enzo's dad decided to continue their business here, so they were staying here permanently.
She also added that Enzo was joining our school, too, and it made me excited for some reason. Later that night, while I was putting out the garbage bag outside, I saw him doing the same. I almost passed out when he turned to face me.
He looked more handsome up close. "Wow, look at you, growing up so fine. Miracles do happen, indeed.
And you're still a waste of oxygen. " "Look, I'm sorry for pushing you on an anthill and stepping on your flowers in your yard. I was just a kid back then.
Can we forget the beef and start all over again as friends, you know? And nothing else. I mean, you're cute, but sorry, you're not my type.
" But he just gave me a look like I was a lost turd in the street and walked back inside. What a jerk. I just focused on my current goal, getting myself a prom date.
But first, I had to get a boy's attention. Most boys loved soccer, so I studied about it all night. And the next day, I walked up to the field where the hottest jocks were practicing and tried to join them.
Soccer is the best. I love to kick balls real hard. Nice kick, homie.
But everyone was acting like I was invisible. Maybe I should try harder. I grabbed a megaphone and walked up to the middle of the field.
Did you know that soccer's modern origins began in England in 1863? But not sure about the exact month and day though. I'll dig into that later.
And oh, my favorite player is Lionel Messiah. Finally, someone turned to me and it was Jacob of all people, the most popular guy in school. Jackpot.
As he walked up to me, I gave him my sweetest smile. Excuse me, but can you move? We're practicing.
Oh, um let me join you then. I snatched the ball from him and kicked it. But I ended up kicking him instead.
Uh-oh. I dashed away from the field before he could kill me. Just then, I tripped and fell face first into some dog poop.
When I looked up, I saw a familiar face walking up to me. It was Enzo. I thought he was going to help me, but to my surprise, he skipped over me and went to pick up a random sunflower on the grass.
What a terrible human being. I went to the toilet to clean up and hyped myself up in the mirror to calm down. You're not a potato.
You're the ripest strawberry. A queen. A rockstar.
You don't need to change yourself for someone's validation. Don't chase them. They should be the ones chasing you.
But then, you're not running. You're literally standing right now, so how could they chase you? Maybe you should start running.
Ah, you're so smart, you little strawberry. As I was blowing myself a kiss and posing like a constipated duck, I noticed someone's reflection behind me. It was Jacob.
Uh how long have you been standing there? Long enough to fall in love with you? Wow, did someone blackmail you or something?
What are you doing here? I'm here to punish you for kicking me. But it was a harmless little kick, or was it an assault?
Oh, no. I'm going to jail. Do you think they have Wi-Fi there?
You're amusing. Want to be my girlfriend? Pinch me, punch me, shake me, throw me away to Mars.
I might be dreaming. But, no. Jacob, the cutest guy in school, just asked me out.
So, of course, I said yes. We finally started dating, and everyone couldn't believe it, especially Shannon. I'm sure Jacob's just using you for some little entertainment, because you're literally a joke and an embarrassment.
Remember, he's mine. He's yours, but he's dating me. Weird.
Go lick some soap, please. How dare you talk to me like that? Don't you know who I am?
You're Shannon, right? Before she could eat me alive, Nova suddenly came and snatched me away from her. What are you doing?
What? I didn't do anything. I just told her to go lick some soap, please.
Heather, just stay out of trouble. You'll never win against her. She's the principal's daughter.
If we continue to piss her off, we'll be doomed. I still need to be the prom queen and graduate as the top student. Just relax, okay?
I got you. I knew Nova wasn't convinced, so I promised myself to behave. I ignored Shannon's death glares at school and focused on the perks of dating Jacob.
But, for some reason, I wasn't feeling the sparks. One night, he insisted on having dinner with us at home, and Mom couldn't believe it when I introduced him as my boyfriend. Are you sure you're not blind or something?
Mom. Jacob just laughed, while Nova went ahead to her room. As soon as Jacob left, she suddenly barged into mine.
Of all the boys, why him? Don't you find it suspicious that he noticed you all of the sudden after all of these years? Why?
You find it impossible for a guy like him to actually like a nutcase like me? It's not like that. I just don't really trust that jock.
I started to realize Nova's warning over the next few days. Whenever Jacob and I were together, he would always ask me to do some weird things like talking to a dog and eating without using my hands. He and his friends would then laugh at me like crazy and it was very insulting.
One time after lunch, I had a little food crumb near my nose and he didn't tell me about it. Everyone thought it was a booger and he'd been laughing with them all day. I finally had enough.
I needed to break up with him. So, I followed him to an empty classroom only to witness something that shook my world. He was trying to kiss a girl and it wasn't just any other girl.
It was my sister. I hid behind a wall to listen to their conversation. Get off me, you jerk.
Come on, Nova. Don't you get it? I only dated your sister just to get close to you.
I don't care. Just leave me and my sister alone. She slapped him before storming off leaving me totally stunned.
His revelation didn't break my heart, but what he did to us was so low of him. I had to teach him a lesson. That weekend after their successful soccer game, I snatched the announcer's mic and dropped a bomb on them.
Hi. Hello. Excuse me.
Um Jacob, first of all, congratulations on the win. Yay. And second, uh we're done.
Okay? This is a breakup and it's not you, it's me. Uh just kidding.
It really is you because you're boring. Your breath is stinkier than poop and your abs are not hard enough for me. So, bye.
Everyone erupted into laughter as I walked away like a boss. Nova couldn't stop squealing about it when we got home. Of all the embarrassing things that you did, that was my favorite.
We then decided to go to prom together and to be honest, that sounded better. As Nova left, I caught myself glancing at my window straight to Enzo's. He was walking back and forth in front of his window while reading a book and he was making me dizzy.
Well, if he wasn't so grumpy and arrogant, that would have been attractive. It It only been a few weeks since he joined our but he had already formed his own fan club and I wasn't surprised. Suddenly, he stopped and looked straight at me.
I slowly and pointedly pulled out my chair, sat, leaned on my study table, and opened the book in front of me while making eye contact. Then I wrote something on a piece of paper and showed it to him. He looked amused for a second, but then he rolled his eyes at me before pulling his blinds closed.
Wait a minute. Why was I smiling? The next day at school, I found out that Shannon got mad because Nova accidentally ruined one of her posters.
And now they were having the cat fight of the century. I threw myself between them and pushed Shannon away. Oh, please Shannon.
No matter how hard you try, my sister's going to win that crown. You're just a plain pancake with a thousand layers of makeup. My sister is way prettier than you.
She's a natural. Natural? Let's make it artificial then.
She grabbed a bucket of dirty water from the janitor's cart and splashed it on Nova's face. To get back at her, I grabbed the dirty mop and slapped it on her stupid face, taking everyone by surprise. Hurt my sister again and I'll slap you with a cactus next time, you filthy creature.
You're going to pay for this. You'll see. That's right.
Run home to mommy because that's all you can do. As expected, the principal suspended both Nova and me for two weeks. And that also meant that we couldn't attend prom.
Nova tried to negotiate with the principal, but of course she'd side with her awful daughter. If my sister couldn't be the prom queen, then Shannon shouldn't be either. And I had to do something about it.
After carefully planning my revenge, I put on a mask, gloves, and a hoodie, and some props before heading to Shannon's mansion at midnight. I hid behind some bushes as I waited for their front porch light to be turned off. Suddenly, someone popped in beside me.
Fancy seeing you here. Holy puppies, what are you doing here? Did you follow me?
Judging by your outfit, I knew you were about to do something stupid again, so I just came to warn you that trespassing is illegal, and we should just go home. Why do you care anyway? You're just my grumpy neighbor.
Just then, two scary black dogs started barking behind us. Oh no. I know I'm not exactly pageant material, but do I look like a bone?
Please don't answer that. Just then, the dogs started chasing us. Enzo grabbed my hand and led me to the back of the house.
We then entered an open window and ended up in the kitchen. We can't stay here. We're going to get caught.
Don't you think I know that? Remove your shoes. We can't leave marks.
They can trace us through shoe marks. I watched that one episode of CSI where the serial killer was caught because of his Adidas. Can you believe it?
Suddenly, someone walked in. Enzo was quick to cover my mouth and pushed me against the wall to hide. As he was on high alert, I couldn't help but think how close we were right now.
I could even feel his heartbeat racing, or was it mine? She's gone. Now, tell me, what exactly do you plan to do for revenge?
Watch me. As we finally reached Shannon's bedroom, I took out my fake crocodile balloon, and while I was blowing it up, I noticed Enzo staring at me. What?
Nothing. You're cute. Oh, wow.
I didn't expect that from you. Sorry about being grumpy. Those were just the times that I had my period.
I continued blowing up the balloon to hide my blush, and when it was huge enough, I threw it beside the sleeping Shannon, waking her up. I started taking Polaroid pictures of her as she screamed her heart out, making sure I got her worst angles. Enzo and I were chuckling as we fled the scene.
We then headed to the school to put up all Shannon's ugly, no makeup pictures all over the school. I got home still on a high about what we just did. Enzo was an amazing accomplice.
Speaking of him, I turned to look at his window, and my jaw dropped. He looked like he had just had a bath, and then I realized he was shirtless, and I could see his abs, his very defined abs. Holy yummy macaroni.
Just then he turned to me and caught me drooling all over him. I immediately pretended to be doing exercise by the window. Exercise is important, you know, especially at midnight.
Not that you need that information. Like look at your body, you obviously work out. Uh I mean, you you look healthy.
You look healthy, too. He then gave me a smile and shut his window. Ugh, that was awkward.
The next day at school, the whole building was filled with Shannon's screams. And when I couldn't help but laugh as we watched her tear off her pictures like an idiot. We became closer since then, and soon I just found myself falling for him.
One day when I came down, I saw him in our living room. What was he doing here? Hey, Heather.
I want to ask you something. Oh my gosh, was he finally going to ask me out on a date? Is Is Nova home?
I came to return her notes. Oh, so they were close, too. Nova?
Yeah, she's here, definitely. Uh this is her house, too. Let me get her.
I went upstairs and told Nova that Enzo was waiting for her. She went down and they kept talking. I even heard them laughing and for some reason, it sounded annoying.
Enzo and Nova continued hanging out with each other. Of course, if he likes someone, that would be her. I shouldn't be surprised at this point.
I decided to distance myself from him. I would act busy whenever he approached me at school. I didn't want another Jacob situation.
I had to get over my crush before it was too late. But it wasn't easy, especially since every time I spoke to Nova the past week, she would be like, "Enzo this and Enzo that. Did you know that Enzo is excellent at math?
Oh, Enzo prefers salty food, too. " So that weekend when Nova asked me to hang out with her and Enzo as a favor, I told her I was busy. Busy planning on stalking them.
They went to the park to feed some ducks and I was extremely jealous. Suddenly, it looked like he was about to kiss Nova. I jumped out of the bushes and screamed, "Stop!
Don't kiss! " What? There's a There's an insect.
There, it's gone now. Well, hey you two. Such a coincidence to see you both here.
Are you spying on us? I'm no spy, you dork. I thought you were busy.
I was. Anyway, I just realized that I need to go home. I left something in the kitchen when we went out and I needed to make sure it didn't burn or something.
That's why I've been acting anxious. That's right. I need to go home.
But I hope you guys enjoy the rest of the day. Bye. Ugh, that was a disaster.
But when Nova got home, she kept insisting that I was jealous. Fine, I was jealous, okay? But it was just a crush.
You don't have to worry about it. I'll get over it soon enough. Just Can you please try to not bring him up every time?
Heather, there's nothing going on between us. Every time we hang out, we talk about you. I asked you to come with us today because he said that you've been avoiding him.
What? The guy is in love with you, you fool. Her revelation almost made me pee my pants.
Thank god I was able to reach the bathroom just in time. I was expecting Enzo to talk to me about it, but to my disappointment, all he did was shut his window and avoid me at school. Weird.
The day of the prom finally came and Nova and I decided to crash the event and everyone was so hyped up when we came with our iconic outfits. Shannon was about to throw some fit, but then the announcer came up on stage to finally announce the winners. As expected, Jacob won the prom king and Nova as the queen.
Deserved. This is unacceptable. She was disqualified because of her suspension.
Shannon tried to snatch the crown from Nova, but some people picked her up and threw her out. Serves her right. I was about to look for Enzo among the crowd when I suddenly crashed into the table of drinks.
Everyone turned to me as I bathed in orange juice. Just then someone approached me and started wiping the juice off my face. Enzo.
You silly girl. Wha- What are you doing? Taking care of you.
Why? Because I like you. I like how weird and awkward you are, and how loud your personality can be.
I'm drawn to how real you are. I'm in love with you, Heather. Everything about you.
Well, I guess I like your abs. He chuckled and finally asked me the ultimate question. Will you be my prom queen?
I thought you'd never ask. Everyone then cheered for us as we finally kissed.